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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Mommy's to be...daycare question.
Hi Ladies,
Wondering how all mommy's to be figuered out the daycare decision when it comes to the littles ones. We are wanting to start a family but we are trying to plan to prepare and we looked at daycares, places, quality, costs, etc. A friend of mine uses a daycare she is not so happy with but says there aren't many "good ones". Another friend of mine has one she loves but says she pays $50 a day for both her daughters. The whole idea of daycares is a realistic one but it makes me worry. I would love to be a stay at home mom but realistically it's not possible. Anyone else go through these worries?
Re: Mommy's to be...daycare question.
Yes, we are trying to decide our plan now. My work schedule varies and I only work one or two days during the week, and the days rotate every week. We dont want to have to pay for a FT spot at a daycare when I want to be with the kids on my days off.
Idealy we are looking into a nanny or a sitter who will watch our son the weekdays that I am working. Some friends I work with have recommended a few local in home daycares that charge as little as $35/day per child. That would be perfect too since we could right it off. We do have a few people lined up so far who will watch him but still looking into the dc route.
So many that I know of won't take infants at all. My dad is retired and my mom is semi-retired, so they will likely be our daycare. But most of my friends have either in-home sitters or take their kids to a home daycare.
When I was in college I was an after-school nanny...and I wasn't in an education field or anything. I knew lots of teachers and nurses-to-be that prefered parttime jobs like babysitting/daycare. Maybe you could check w/ the local colleges and see if there is a job board you could post on when the time comes. I heard from a friend of mine the other day that her son's daycare has internet video monitoring, so her or her husband can logon during the day and see what the baby is up to. Not sure the price of that place, but seems like a nice "safety" feature.
Otherwise, I would say churches tend to have nice daycare programs. A few of our employees have their kids in local church programs. The "class" size is small and there's plenty of adults to kids, more one-on-one time it seems.
Deb, I have heard a lot that it's either pay fulltime or nothing. I have a friend who lives north of Tampa and the only daycare in her small town has this policy. Which is such a disservice. Hopefully your friends/family will make a nice support system on your work days.
When I had my son I worked full time for Disney, so we utilized the Disney YMCA daycares - which I loved! (although I understand their toddler rooms are a bit crazy lol). I think we paid about $35/day.
Last fall I left Disney and briefly flirted with a part time job. Unfortunately, there were very few daycares (besides Disney) that I would even consider. There's a nice one by us called Ladybird Academy, but a I would have had to pay something crazy like $140/wk for two days of daycare!
We have thought long and hard about this. I cant afford to stay home because I make way more and we need my salary. Also I just dont trust daycares. Our Co is 24/7 so we can bid any open shift. I just went back to midnights and Jerry just went to Days so someone will always be home with the baby.
Good Luck its a tuff decision.
I went the daycare route for many reasons. My main one being that there are more adults in the building then one single person at home with 2 or more kids (regarding an in home sitter situation). I felt more comforable with that. If someone gets frustrated, tired, sick then there is always someone at daycare to cover for them. Not the case with in home care. I also wanted my son to be around lots of other kids. Of course a lot comes along with that (ie..GERMS!) at times. He started at 14 weeks old in an infant room at our daycare. He got lots of attention and rocking time. The ladies in the room were like grandmothers and I never once (aside from the first time leaving him which was like having your heart riped out of your chest!!) felt guilty for leaving him there. OUr daycare does have part time options. They are however based on their choice days/times. He is currently going 2 full days a week, but they have to be Tues and Thurs. It's not flexable at all. But its working for us right now. We pay $76/week for those two days. I do have to pay the $76 even if he misses a day. Which sucks, but I do get why! He was there for probably 6 mns before he ever got sick. Now that he is in a toddler room things are a bit different. The kids are bigger and more aggressive. When I picked him up last Thurs he had a bite mark on his cheek...yes some little shit bit my sons cheek! But I have to be aware that that is the kind of stuff that is going to happen with a room full of one year olds! He hates when I leave him now (though this also happend when its family watching him) lately and cries and cries and my heart gets riped out daily as of late! THis is a new phase that I was sure having him in daycare since he was 3 mns old would avoid. I was wrong! He just started this at 15 months old and its still as hard as it would have been as an infant.
Its a tuff decision to make, but give it lots of thought and weight all of your options and you will make the one that is best for you!
Yes definitely! We also don't think we will have a second until Lily is in pre-k cause of the crazy costs! The one we are going to is Ladybird, it is crazy expensive though....HOWEVER...when I looked around at all the "nice" ones in town they were all similar rates. I'ld rather have something close. (I can get from work to home to daycare literally in five minutes) and something safe and secure that I am comfortable with. I believe it's $220 a week. It's amazing that I still come out on top working as a teacher! LOL
Something we also had to think about was all that my job covers such as insurance, etc. If we had to pay insurance on our own or go with DH's company it would be so expensive that I could not afford to stay home. With me working and insurance covered we are better off. Though part of me wishes I could stay home... I know I am going to be doing the right thing for our family. Plus, I love teaching and will have summers off, etc.
I definitely agree with the daycare rather than home daycare. Same reasons...more people, don't have to work around family's schedule, certifications, etc.
I'm late on this, but I agree with Ebi and Jen. My daughter is in daycare and I love it! I like the daycare center better than in-home daycare because there are more people, more regulations, etc.
I say that I would like to stay home, but when I really think about it, taking Rylie to daycare really isn't that bad. If I were at home, I'm sure I wouldn't be focusing on her 24/7 and the girls at daycare are. She is already learning so much there and I like the fact that she is with other kids. She loves going there too. She is so happy when we go in every morning.
It is a tough decision to make, though. And you definitely have to find a place that gives you good vibes. Good luck!
Also coming in late...
I don't know if my situation would even help you b/c (I think) I lucked out with our arrangement. For the months that mil is at her other home (up north), I take A to an in-home babysitter. She and her 25 year old daughter work together and there are 3 boys (about 10 months older than A) and a little girl (about 6 months younger than A - but she's not there everyday). The cost is $100 a week and she came highly recommended by 2 women that I work with (their sons are 2 of the kids there) and about 3 other teachers have had there children there within the last 5 or so years.
I'm able to stop by at any time I want, I get daily reports, and A seems to thrive in that environment.
I have always been fearful (because of news reports, and I know that it doesn't happen at every daycare center, and it can happen at in-home places too), but I never wanted to put my child in a center until he was able to speak and "report" to me what happens there. To me, too many people, can leave a doubt as to who may have done something inappropriate or unprofessional. With one (or two) daycare providers... there is never a question as to "who or whom" (never can remember which word is right here) is responsible.
When all is said and done, just make sure you go with whatever makes YOU and DH comfortable. Be sure to listen to your gut.