Trouble in Paradise
lizznjohn
member
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Hubby's snoring is ruining our marriage!!! HELP!
There is no escape! Everywhere I go, I can hear him snore! I can even hear him snore OUTSIDE!
Doesn't matter which side he sleeps on. We don't have health insurance or the $$ to see a specialist. He has been once before and they weren't able to do anything.
He feels like it's my issue to deal with, I disagree. Im not the one keeping me up!
Anyone have this issue? How are you/did you deal with it? I haven't gotten decent sleep in over a month. Please help!
Doesn't matter which side he sleeps on. We don't have health insurance or the $$ to see a specialist. He has been once before and they weren't able to do anything.
He feels like it's my issue to deal with, I disagree. Im not the one keeping me up!
Anyone have this issue? How are you/did you deal with it? I haven't gotten decent sleep in over a month. Please help!
White Kids Love Hip Hop.
Re: Hubby's snoring is ruining our marriage!!! HELP!
Yikes. My DH snored for a week and it made me about ready to lose my mind. I HATE snoring. Honestly, it's both of your problems. He's being kind of an ass by not caring at all that he's keeping you up. You have three options
A) Elbow him in the ribs every time he wakes you up. And if he gets pissy tell him it's not YOUR fault he can't sleep through it.
C) Find a way to fix it. New pillows, nose strips, ear plugs, quitting smoking, losing weight, (if either are needed) etc.
Best of luck!
Nestie Bestie with the lovely RockABye
Yikes! My husband snores all the time. But if I fall asleep first, it rarely wakes me up. I think only a handful of times. I usually kick him out to the second bedroom.
I think it's crappy he says it's your problem, but he can't exactly control it either. The only thing I can suggest is sleeping in different rooms and/or trying out some alternative remedies... I don't know of any offhand, but can you try to look some up online?
Good luck.
come up with a plan to get health insurance and/or save up cash to pay the doctor directly.
you are adults - you need health insurance.
do what you can to get a job (either of you) that has health insurance.
then have him go see a doctor.
what are you going to do it one of you suddenly needs your appendix out, breaks a leg/arm/wrist/foot...?
When you've been married this long, you need a ticker to remind you.
Baby Boy M - 08/01/2013
Get health insurance. Immediately.
I got insurance through Blue Cross/Blue Shield for $100/month when I was between jobs. Everyone that can pay for these new-fangled internet phones but can't pay for health insurance are really misguided and hurting *everyone* by not having coverage. I know it's not that easy for everyone (pre-existing conditions), but you are doing yourself and everyone in this country a disservice by not having it.
Sounds like he has sleep apnea. DH has the same issue. I used to wear ear plugs, then he started sleeping in a separate room...then I just got used to it. We heard that there's a mouth piece that can help.
He needs to get to a doc for a full checkup. And see another specialist; don't stop until you get the help you need.
Try a sleep clinic, also, through a teaching hospital. GL.
My partner snored badly. Even though he had approval for a sleep study, he wouldn't go - for over a year. He snored so badly, I had to sleep on the couch on another floor. I hated him for not being willing to deal with it and it did some serious damage to our relationship
He finally went and got a sleep study and they found that he had sleep apnea. They had him try a night with a CPAP machine and came home dancing for joy. He said it was the best night's sleep he had had in ages. He said he felt completely different.
He uses a CPAP machine now and we can sleep in the same bed again. And I don't have to worry that he is going to die in his sleep.
If you don't have insurance, figure out how to get it. If you can't, figure out if you can state health coverage. If you make too much, call your GP and get a referral to a sleep clinic. Then call the clinic and tell them about your situation. Find out if they will do the sleep study on a sliding scale. Save up, make it a Christmas present to each other.
Bravo!
This precisely!
Agree!
DH has had his CPAP since May and it's wonderful. He sleeps through the night, I sleep through the night, and we are both happier people. I heard from many people that the CPAPs were loud and it was worse to sleep with them than the snoring, but that has not been my experience. We've had two difference machines, both were quiet. He's in bed, with his machine on and running next to me and it's a light white noise.
The University (Wake Forest) we use for most of our health needs does have an income assist/uninsured program for most of their doctors. You can find CPAPs on CL according to my mother. Thankfully we are insured and insurance paid for his CPAP.
Sleep Apnea is dangerous to allow to go on untreated and can cause heart attack, stroke, and other issues. Most of the time snoring is a symptom of a health issue.
What kind of specialist did he see before and what did they try?
We went through Breathe right strips, cutting out alcohol, tsp olive oil before bed, aromatherapy from http://www.snoringshop.com/, an MRI with a trip to the ENT, finally got one of these http://www.strongdental.com/suad_patient.php. It's not cured, but it's better.I agree with the PP's he really should see someone to rule out sleep apnea which can be very dangerous. I would also recommend him trying the breath right strips. He may not even realize that hes actually not sleeping that well and when he tries them he may sleep better.
I also recommend for you some kind of white noise machine like a fan, I can't sleep without mine and my husband doesn't even snore. I just wake up a the littlest noises and that helps to block it out.
I know your pain. My husband used to snore so loudly that it drove me crazy.
He already sleeps with fan blowing in his face to help him breath better. Through trial and different things. He sleeps with those breathe right strips and a pillow that props his head up a bit more it really made a difference. So much that I can tell if he's using a different pillow to sleep. I am a light sleeper so I also sleep with ear plugs. It's helped and I know sleep well.
Snoring doens't automatically mean sleep apnea... not that it should be ruled out, but that's not always the case.
I'm a light sleeper, and my husband does snore. He isn't a "small" guy, however he isn't obese, but i'm sure that probably attributes a little to his snoring, anyway I sleep with ear plugs in. I hardly notice it anymore. Not good if it's putting THAT much of a strain on your relationship.
As other people have suggested, try saving money to see the specialist, or get some insurance. Until then there are some naturopathic remedies you can try, search them out. There's mouth guards, nose strips, different pillows etc. Not that you need to try everything under the sun, but maybe something will help.
Good luck, I suggest ear plugs for yourself
This. My dad has sleep apnea. Snoring, especially really bad snoring, can mean sleep apnea, and it's dangerous to just let it go. Sleep apnea is when the person stops breathing periodically while sleeping. The solution is a special breathing machine at night but it would be better than him passing away because it's untreated. A few years ago a pro football player died because of this. Please, get to a doctor.
Edited to say that after finishing reading the replies I see that this a repetitive answer but should still be checked out because of the seriousness of it.
Sleep apnea and strokes are 2 of the maladies he can get.
I suggest a sleep clinic stat -- universities sometimes run them -- and a CPAP machine for him.
Look into getting one; call your local teaching hospital --- try the cardiology and pulmonary medicine department -- they can best advise you where one can be obtained.
If he is overweight -- and I will bet he is -- I suggest he lose weight asap. That alone may resove the snoring problem.
Until then, he needs a doc's evaluation. Again, try a clinic. GL.