My brother asked his GF to marry him on Christmas, she said yes. I always thought they would wait until 2015 to get married, when she was finished with grad school, but they planned it for June 28, 2014. She was going to take 2 years off after graduation before going to grad school and she was going to dedicate the first year to planning the wedding, and the next year to study for the LSATs. Somewhere along the way she decided to only take 1 year off...
A few weeks ago, at my parents' for dinner, she said to me that when looking into applying for scholarships and grants for grad school they seem to award more money to people who are MARRIED. Her parents have said they are going to pay for her graduate school education. Because the deadline for applying for these scholarships and grants is BEFORE their wedding she said that her and my brother have been talking about going to the court house BEFORE their wedding...
Ugh I just feel so weird about this because I know that my mom would FREAK out, and my grandparents wouldn't understand. Plus I would feel their wedding in June just wouldn't be as special because they are ALREADY MARRIED.
I understand people do this all the time for all kinds of reasons, but this is just a lame reason and I hope it doesn't happen...
Re: Getting Married Before Wedding...
I'm not a fan of it, but just a thought, this is really only uncommon in the western world, I know latin America requires a civil wedding to happen before the church wedding, and from my understand it is the same in most of Africa. It's very acceptable everywhere but the western world to have a "church" or "family" wedding that's later then the legal wedding. (This thought has helped me from being too judgemental when I hear about people doing this here.)
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Eww so tacky! I don't understand why people don't just go ahead and move up the wedding instead of having a wedding at the courthouse then having just a big party.
Also, I'd decline going to a wedding if I knew the couple was already married and if I was family, I'd be side eyeing them then entire day. Especially if they did a full on reception (dress, cake, first dances etc.) the jig is up people, you're already married!
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This reminds me of my boss's neice. She and her H got married at the courthouse. A week later they went to Mexico for the wedding. The wedding was already planned, but because they had to jump through a bunch of hoops to get legally married there, they went to the courthouse. Now, this where it gets interesting. The MOB had been planning a reception the following week for the people who couldn't make it. Okay, this seems fine. BUT it turned into everyone wanted her to wear her dress again, and wanted pictures. Well, it turned into a full blown wedding..ceremony, reception. The whole bit. I was floored for sure. Now that was tacky!
I don't know why people feel the need to go to the courthouse to get married and then have a wedding. You already had your wedding. You don't get another day just because you want a big party and a pretty princess dress.
Their event in June would not be a wedding - it's a vow renewal. Your wedding day is the day you become husband and wife. You can't have a wedding if you're already married unless you get a divorce.
For some reason, this is my pet peeve. You get one wedding. One. If you choose to do a quick JOP for whatever reason (financial, insurance, military etc.) you don't get a do-over. I think it's so tacky to have a pretty princess day after you're already married, and to expect people to play along and buy you gifts because of it... Just, no.