Family Matters
beckerkoszarek
member
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
My Mother in Law woes
My MIL hates me for not wanting kids and everything inbetween. I thought as much prior to our wedding but it became crystal clear the day of our wedding, and even in our wedding photos. I invited my MIL to be a part of wedding planning in hopes we could bond but it just ended in her saying "we'll...it's not my style" and that her daughters wedding was perfect. It was very uncomfortable, but I cheerfully pushed through. The weekend of the wedding she avoided me like the plague and hunkered down at a table for the rehersal and reception and only left it for drinks. She just talked about her daughter and never mentioned her son or I. She missed our first dance since she was busy with hr daughter and son in law and table. I saw this all happening but thought, "maybe I'm just miss reading it". However at the brunch I was informed that I was not the only one who saw this. I felt horrible! We just also got pictures back and in every candid photo she has the most angry look at me and so does her daughter. She also has a habit of getting me alone and cornering me to tell me that I have to do this or that, it's very scary. I don't know what to do! Help?
Re: My Mother in Law woes
As to her cornering you, next time put your hands up in front of you and start talking very loudly. No matter what the subject is. NO MIL we aren't having children, talk to your SON!! I need to use the ladies room, NOW.
And as for her cornering you?
You tell her this exactly:
"Buzz off and go the hell away. NOTHING is open for discussion with YOU and if you do not like it, piss off."
And let her call the cops, the feds, the Attorney General, the Supreme Court and whoever else she wants to whine to, in reply to your comment above.
I am serious: you tell her to shove off. Stick up for yourself. Don't be a wimp, a patsy or her footstool.
And another thing:
Your H needs to step up and take your side. I don't see any evidence he is doing so, so you have 3 problems:
The biggest one being your H, since he is supposed to be an adult and a team with you
The second one is you: STAND UP FOR YOUR RIGHTS
THe third one is HER: you need to put her in her place.
Stand for none of her divisive nonsense. GL.
Put none of her photos in the album.
If you really want to get a good laugh and bust her balls, do this:
Get every single photo where she is pouting, ticked off, looks like she ate last week's sushi for dinner, is flying the flag, has something stuffed up her netherregion, etc...
Get 'em all, including those submitted by the guests.,..
Get as many as you can. A few hundred is nice.
And go to Shutterfly and make up a "mother's photo album" with NOTHING but her pissy face fotos IN THEM.
Crop all the photos before hand and make sure ONLY her making a face is in the photo.
This album will be "her" mother's album. A gift to her, at no charge of course.:)
That'll take the wind out of her overblown sails before you can say so much as "Everyone say 'Cheese'!" hehe
C'mon, OP...fess up...
If he told and he brereched confidence, he's bad news. He can't go through life telling tales out of school; you should be furious -- AT HIM.
If the 2 of you told her or you did? Well, ya might have known there'd be fallout. Learn a lesson and tell her nothing ever again.
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
I'm serious. DO it. Maybe that will be a nice wake up call for her to stop being such a right nasty git about everything.
PS: This gift is best given when there is a lot of family gathered --- Christmas would be a lovely occasion! She opens the gift and everyone goes "so what did you get, Ma? Let's see....."
She can't be permitted to do a number on you. I urge you to take a stand on this.
I personally can't figure out what the end to what means any of this divisive nonsense is -- it proves nothing, it solves nothing and life is too short for this kind of thing.