I am so so happy my sister is having a baby. Super pumped, my 1st sister to have one. My bros have kids, but its just different.
But, here I am, feeling horrible. I am just I guess a little jealous. She is my sister just below me. I'm the oldest daughter. Well, she got married before I did, no big deal. Just my Mom got to experience that 1st thing with her. Whatever, no bigs, it helped me out a little. My sister is now having a baby and I just feel so happy, yet so sad. I don't know why. I guess I just always hoped I would get to experience these things with my Mom as her 1st. Sounds very selfish and I don't even like feeling this way. She is being induced. I don't know maybe I just needed to get this off my chest.
Re: Feeling a little jealous.
One thing that I was irrationally upset about was that DHs family has 12 kids (6 boys/6 girls). My family had 2 kids (1 boy/1 girl). All along, we've wanted to be team green and thought it would be exciting to be the "tie breaker". Then my sister had a boy. Such a silly thing to be upset about, but it was something I was looking forward to. She's now expecting a girl, which means I get my tie-breaker hope back. Let's just hope she doesn't have a third before we have our first!
I guess what I'm saying is, it's okay to be jealous or upset over something that may seem silly. Feelings are feelings, you can't really change that. What's important is that you're not holding those feelings against your sister.
dx: Unexplained IF (mild MFI)
TTC since May 2011, 1 year trying, and then 3 TI, 2 IUI = BFN
IVF #1 (May 2013): Antagonist Protocol:24R, 18M, 15F w/ICSI; 5dt of 2 early blasts, no frosties = BFN
IVF #2 (August 2013): Lupron Stop Protocol:
28R, 23M, 15F w/ICSI; 5dt of 1 partially hatched blast, 7 frosties = BFP
EDD 5/23/14, blighted ovum (6w6d), D&C (8w6d)
FET #1 (April 2014): transferred 2 5d blasts = BFP
C.J. born 01/09/15
B/w 1/8: betas 17,345, progesterone 25.6
Now my Sister is starting TTC next month and I just have a feeling it's going to be easy for her and I'm super nervous she will get PG before DH and I.
TTC 19 months ~Started RE in March 2014~
DH was not ready for IUI so we waited
~Started acupuncture in May 2014~
~~BFP 7/6/14~~~EDD 3/14/15~~It's a girl!!~~
"I DO NOT love that you think so many things revolve around you. I know you're bitter. I get it. But I'm over your feelings." The best person on the internet ever!
BFP 2: 7/7/2014 Beta 7/8: 115, Beta 7/12: 638, Beta 7/16: 3793, Beta 7/21: 21,625
Cinnabun and Junebug say, "Go Wildcats!"
Though you can be SO happy for her it still hurts inside, she has something you so desperately want. Be happy with your family, but its ok to sob like a child on the way home (then eat ice cream).
((hugs))
4/11- 12/11 Provera, 3 cycles clomid 50mg, all BFN (HSG-all clear)
Dec 2011 DH S/A shows zero count - dx Azoo
TESE 4/13/12 - Sperm found!! 5 viles frozen
IVF ICSI #1- (Lupron protocol) 5R 2F 2dt- 2DP & 4CF - BFFN
IVF ICSI #2- (Antagonist protocol) Started stims 7/26
ER 8/8 11R 9F 3dt - 9BF & 7BF (+HPT 8dp3dt)beta 1-184 beta 2- 1699 TWINS! EDD 5/1/13
LAP Transabdominal Cerclage - 4/15/13 only possibility of carrying my children to term
IVF ICSI #3.2- (Antagonist Protocol) 7/26 start stims (same day, a year later from J & Z's stim start date!)
ER - 8/7 19R 9F 3dt of 2 8BF embryos. (+ HPT 7dp3dt) Beta #1- 82.8 Beta #2- 821 Beta 3-7254
Colin born via c/s 4/7/14 (36w5d) 6lbs 14oz - 8 days in the NICU
TTC #2 - IVF 4 - July 2015 (Antagonist Protocol) 7/10 start stims
15R 8F 5dt of 1E blast grade BA & 1 blast to freeze!! (+hpt 6dp5dt)
beta #1-52 beta #2-62 Beta #3-6.5 - CP
FET - 9/18/15 (+hpt 5dp5dt) beta #1 -225.1 beta #2-2468 beta #3-21,352
10/29 - U/S shows 1 bean! HR 151 EDD 6/7/16 It's a BOY!
5/18/16 Jacob born via c/s (37w 1d) 9lbs .8oz 19in - 6 days in the NICU
Baby E born: 2/16/2014 at 12:56pm. 5lb 15oz
In Christ alone my hope is found. He is my LIGHT, my STRENGTH, and my SONG!
T-TTC since Dec 2008. PCOS/nonexistant cycles(anovulation) and endo. HSG in '10 revealed both tubes blocked. Lap surgery in Dec '10 to correct. Failed Clomid/IUI and injectable(Bravelle)/IUI cycles so far.