May 2012 Weddings
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ILs Getting a Divorce

Hi ladies, It looks as though my ILs are heading towards divorce. Their marriage has been shaky for years and in October my MIL told my FIL she wasn't happy and they came up with some things they could work on. She kept up her end of the bargain but he did not. This weekend at the family business Christmas party they had a huge fight and she told him it was over. She moved out and she has been living with us since. I am doing my best to listen and be supportive. DH is handling it alright, he was expecting it to happen as they have been quite clearly unhappy for years. We're all quite sure FIL has been having an affair but he is not admitting to anything. Just looking for some happy vibes and any advice you have about dealing with a divorce, especially around the holidays. We are trying to remain neutral to both sides. Even though MIL is staying with us, we have told FIL to call us if he needs anything. I can't imagine how hard it must be to end a relationship after nearly 40 years together... April would have been their 35th wedding anniversary. Thanks in advance ladies!
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Re: ILs Getting a Divorce

  • I'm so sorry to hear this. I have no advice but I'm sending happy vibes!
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  • We went through a similar sotuation with my parents a few years ago. The whole thing started 1 year before the wedding. And lasted until Thanksgiving 2012 when everyone finally made up. The whole family actually spent the holidays away from each other in 2011 and it was hard but just make sure YOU and your H still have a good Christmas. Just because they are going through this doesn't mean uou can't still enjoy the holidays. Try to keep things as close to normal as you can and don't let your family feel like a second family because they have no drama currently.

    Just remember the holidays will be gone faster than you know and soon it will just be normal days. Good luck! Sending lots of vibes and prayers your way. You can make it through this.
  • I'm so sorry to hear this, especially at this time of the year. My parents are still married but they've definitely gone through some major ups and downs; they were even separated while I was in college. 

    I would say to just try and be there as best you can for both parents, but at the same time stay out of it. I don't know how your ILs are, but with my parents, that is always difficult. It will be very difficult at first, but will eventually get easier. Good luck, sending lots of nestie vibes your way! 

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  • Divorce is so sad to families :( My parents did it when I was so young and it effected me through my entire life! Sending positive nestie vibes your way

     

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  • Divorce is so sad! Especially if you come up with things you have to work on and 1 and not both comply or work on it. Sending positive vibes during this hard time.
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  • Thank you for your kind advice and vibes!! Sorry to those of you that have gone though this. It's not an easy road!
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