Relationships
bnnunley
member
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Comparing myself to his ex
I've been with my guy for a little over a year and about a month before we started dating is when he and his ex broke it off, she ended it and had cheating on him basically the whole time they were together. I had met her before they had broke up.
Now that we're together I always feel like I don't measure up to her, she thinner, has longer hair and she has really pretty blue eyes. She seems to be successful, she's still in college and said she never makes bad grades and she is a manager at a clothing store (which I shop at, so we see each other often).
We know a lot of the same people and apparently she's not a nice person at all so I don't know why I do this to myself.
I was shopping once and she told me she still talked to my boyfriend mom which made me feel more crappy.
It's so bad that I look at her Facebook and Twitter all the time and I feel so ugly.
Why do I feel so inadequate compared to her? And how do I stop.
Now that we're together I always feel like I don't measure up to her, she thinner, has longer hair and she has really pretty blue eyes. She seems to be successful, she's still in college and said she never makes bad grades and she is a manager at a clothing store (which I shop at, so we see each other often).
We know a lot of the same people and apparently she's not a nice person at all so I don't know why I do this to myself.
I was shopping once and she told me she still talked to my boyfriend mom which made me feel more crappy.
It's so bad that I look at her Facebook and Twitter all the time and I feel so ugly.
Why do I feel so inadequate compared to her? And how do I stop.
Re: Comparing myself to his ex
You have a you problem. You are comparing yourself to her. You are not her. She may be what society deams beautiful but that doesn't mean you aren't gorgeous too. She is no longer with the guy, you are. And there are good reasons for that. He must see a lot of good qualities in you.
Work on your self esteem. Find things you like about yourself & are proud of. Remind yourself of those things. Remind yourself daily if you need to. Also take a break from Facebook and Twitter. Stop looking at her profile because it does you no good. Finally, if you must shop where she works avoid talking to her about anything. She says something be polite, change the subject, walk away.
This is the true minority.
Have a look at the couples that seem to be "odd" in pairing -- maybe she's way taller than he is, he's way heavier than she is, etc.
If your bf wanted a thinner lady, or one with blue eyes or whatever his xGF had, I am sure he'd be dating her instead of you.
Not to worry.
Some therapy for you; you have a tiny little self esteem and insecurity problem; nip this in the bud. Life's too short to be worrying about the xgf's appearance.:)
I'm going to go out on a limb and say that you feel this way because you're young. It's the hormones. They make you crazy.