Family Matters
ev14363
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
neighbor kid keeps coming over and we don't have kids
My husband and I recently moved into a very family friendly neighborhood with the plans of starting a family ourselves. We're currently just renting this house so we know we won't put down major roots but would also like to stay in the neighborhood once it's time for us to buy (very large neighborhood). Both houses to our sides have young kids (ages 6-10 maybe?) that play together.
When we were moving in neighbor kid on the left came up to us and pretty much started telling us his life story. He kept getting in the way of us unloading boxes kept walking into the garage and started to walk into our house until I told him no. Eventually we closed the garage and I didn't see the kids for awhile but then a few hours later I heard them walking around our backyard/patio before moving to the front again. Later that afternoon they had toys in our driveway. I asked one of the kids on the right to move the toy and he moved it and acted like he knew better. We had people coming over that evening to help unpack our things and the chatter box kid ambushed everyone coming in.
Fast forward to the next day and I return home from some errands and look over to my passenger side and see chatterbox standing at my car waving to me. I wasn't feeling well so I didn't say but to move his bike from our yard before I went inside.
I want to lay down to ground rules early so come summertime we aren't be bombarded. I don't mind kids being around but want them to respect our space. Any advice for how to handle this? My first thought was the address it with chatter box since my husband and I haven't met either set of parents. I get the impression chatter box is looking for attention and I don't mind talking with him occasionally but I want him (and his parents) to understand that our yard and driveway are ours and if the kid wants to come into either he has to be invited.
A few other tidbits - I think the house we're renting had been vacant for a month or more so I'm guessing it's possible the neighbor kids were making free use of the space. My husband and I are also coming from an apartment complex with no kids around so we're even more unsure of how to handle this. I don't want to be mean neighbor lady since I'd like to have a friendship with neighbors but I also want them to keep tabs on their kids and keep them out of our space.
Any suggestions??
When we were moving in neighbor kid on the left came up to us and pretty much started telling us his life story. He kept getting in the way of us unloading boxes kept walking into the garage and started to walk into our house until I told him no. Eventually we closed the garage and I didn't see the kids for awhile but then a few hours later I heard them walking around our backyard/patio before moving to the front again. Later that afternoon they had toys in our driveway. I asked one of the kids on the right to move the toy and he moved it and acted like he knew better. We had people coming over that evening to help unpack our things and the chatter box kid ambushed everyone coming in.
Fast forward to the next day and I return home from some errands and look over to my passenger side and see chatterbox standing at my car waving to me. I wasn't feeling well so I didn't say but to move his bike from our yard before I went inside.
I want to lay down to ground rules early so come summertime we aren't be bombarded. I don't mind kids being around but want them to respect our space. Any advice for how to handle this? My first thought was the address it with chatter box since my husband and I haven't met either set of parents. I get the impression chatter box is looking for attention and I don't mind talking with him occasionally but I want him (and his parents) to understand that our yard and driveway are ours and if the kid wants to come into either he has to be invited.
A few other tidbits - I think the house we're renting had been vacant for a month or more so I'm guessing it's possible the neighbor kids were making free use of the space. My husband and I are also coming from an apartment complex with no kids around so we're even more unsure of how to handle this. I don't want to be mean neighbor lady since I'd like to have a friendship with neighbors but I also want them to keep tabs on their kids and keep them out of our space.
Any suggestions??
Re: neighbor kid keeps coming over and we don't have kids
So, I am get interested in what advice you get.
In your situation I would probably tell chatterbox to go home and keep his toys out of your yard (nicely). If he doesn't, I would talk to the parents. Just explain you don't have kids and moved into a house from an apartment for the privacy and space. While chatterbox is such a doll, you'd hate to run over him or his toys so could they please ask chatterbox to not be in your yard uninvited. If you don't get this under control by summer you're going to be a prisoner in your own home.
So, I went to the parents on both sides and asked them if they wouldn't mind keeping their kids off our property and asking them not to allow them to freely come in/out of our gated backyard. One mom was great, no worries, the kids were never a problem again. The other mom flipped out on me a bit and insisted her son could play wherever he wanted because the dad had mowed the lawn while the house was empty. I tried multiple times to reason with her, to no avail.
I called the police and talked to a community service officer who said to give them a ring if there was any trouble. The police issued warnings the first two times I called and on the third I believe the parents were issued a ticket. Haven't heard a peep from them since. The father even came over and apologized and said that if we ever had any trouble to talk to him directly.
Maybe his parents are nonattentive, busy or don't have time for him.
You'd be surprised how common this is -- we had more than 1 kid in our neighborhood who was in that same spot when we were all growing up together.
Perhaps he also simply likes you and your H.:) It doesn't hurt to be a role model for a kid or a good friend to a neighborhood kid. You never know.
The next time you find toys in your driveway, just return them & tell the kids (preferably in the presence of their parents) that since you don't have kids of your own, you aren't in the habit of looking for things in the driveway when you are pulling and out of the driveway and would hate to drive over their toys and break them.
When he comes over to chat, if it's a bad time, just go "Joey, I would love to hear all about that more but we are busy, maybe we can talk later" And if possible make 5-10 minutes later for him. But if they get too annoying, you will have to talk to their parents and just lay down the law.