Pittsburgh Nesties
Luckystar2
member
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Kids and activities
Do you and your dh agree on the amount of activities/sports your kid does?
What do you feel like is too much for your kid? Do you limit things?
Dh was really into sports growing up and I wasn't. So we really differ on our opinions on this.
Dd likes some things but honestly it tends to be a struggle to get her ready to go places so this is just another thing to struggle with. Dh and I work so its often a lot of running around to get to things too.
When dd started school I really didnt want her to do any activity for a while so she could focus on school. Then I agreed to her doing 1 at a time. She's currently doing gymnastics and a soccer skill class (both Saturday) and dh has her starting swimming soon.
What is really getting to me is he spring stuff. He wants her doing T ball which is 3 days a week!! I had no idea it would be so much for one activity!! And he also wants to try soccer too which is I believe 2 days. I think it's too much! Seems anyone I talk to who isn't into sports agree but the sports enthusiasts think its fine.
I also hate the thought that we will be rushing around like crazy after work trying to do this stuff. I know when she is older she may choose that but at this point I hate starting this so early. And dd likes hitting a ball and has done some skill classes but I fear with her strong willed stubborn personality this many days of sports is going to make her dislike this stuff and burn her out.
I don't know...just venting. Dh has agreed to stop soccer if it gets too much. But when it comes down to that I'm not sure if that would happen
What do you feel like is too much for your kid? Do you limit things?
Dh was really into sports growing up and I wasn't. So we really differ on our opinions on this.
Dd likes some things but honestly it tends to be a struggle to get her ready to go places so this is just another thing to struggle with. Dh and I work so its often a lot of running around to get to things too.
When dd started school I really didnt want her to do any activity for a while so she could focus on school. Then I agreed to her doing 1 at a time. She's currently doing gymnastics and a soccer skill class (both Saturday) and dh has her starting swimming soon.
What is really getting to me is he spring stuff. He wants her doing T ball which is 3 days a week!! I had no idea it would be so much for one activity!! And he also wants to try soccer too which is I believe 2 days. I think it's too much! Seems anyone I talk to who isn't into sports agree but the sports enthusiasts think its fine.
I also hate the thought that we will be rushing around like crazy after work trying to do this stuff. I know when she is older she may choose that but at this point I hate starting this so early. And dd likes hitting a ball and has done some skill classes but I fear with her strong willed stubborn personality this many days of sports is going to make her dislike this stuff and burn her out.
I don't know...just venting. Dh has agreed to stop soccer if it gets too much. But when it comes down to that I'm not sure if that would happen
Re: Kids and activities
Ah, welcome to the world of kids and sports. You have only begun to experience the ridiculous crazy world we now live in. Seriously, its nuts and I would tread carefully b/c you could go down a road very quickly of overbooking yourself and you & your kid will burn out.
For us, while I love team sports we are trying (operative word) to not let it run our lives like I see it doing to so many of our friends. At 4-5 yrs they did one thing a season + a class at our church. So Caileigh would do gymnastics once a week & then one evening a class. Until she went to kindergarten and she didn't do the class. In the summer its swim team, and that followed into the fall when she was in 1st grade. Last spring she did softball until she broke her leg. That would have coincided with swimming but it didn't since she couldn't do softball anymore. Honestly, right now is the first time she is doing 2 sports - swimming & she starts basketball games this weekend. But practice is 1 X a week and swimming she goes when she can - 2X a week. For us its not bad. I think any one that says that they need to practice 2-3 days a week at Tball or soccer are NUTS!
Keira is 5 and does gymnastics 1 day a week. She may do lessons in the spring and then she'll swim in the summer or stick with gymnastics. Eamon is 2.5 and has no activites.
I'm a firm believer in not overscheduling myself or my kids. Its just too much esp. b/c both my DH and I have after work activites & would like to also have a life. Plus, I already have seen first hand how truly awful some parents can be when it comes to their kids & sports and I really don't want to go down that path. And I played division 1 sport in college so for me not to want my kids to get caught up in it, is hard for me b/c the benefits can be great.
I'm not sure how old your DD is but I would suggest picking a # of days she can do things and that's it. Whether its sports or something else.
Rant over
How time flies! Caileigh (9), Keira (6) & Eamon (3)
I totally agree with trying things out to see what she likes and we have done that. Dd has done swimming lessons on and off since she was an infant. And on and off gymnastics. She did 2 years of dance which was done during daycare so that was easy. She has done 2 sessions each of soccer skills and baseball skills. So it's not like she hasn't been exposed to any of these sports.
Dd doesn't seem to overly love any of them. She really hated her first year of soccer and baseball but has since enjoyed it a little more. But I'm concerned that starting tball at 3 days a week is going to be not fun for her. She likes hitting the ball but practice and games are not just that.
The other issue with dd is that she hates getting ready to go anywhere so we literally struggle every morning getting her to go to school. Adding going to activities to this drives me nuts. Even if she likes the activity it's still generally a fight but its torture if she doesn't like it.
Dh and I both agree that we don't want to be those people who are never home because of kids activities. We want our kids to try new things but not all at once. Our oldest is 4.5 and she does dance class once a week this year. Last spring/summer she did t-ball. We are going to have both girls take swimming lessons next month. But I consider that more of a life skill than an activity. So next fall each girl can pick one activity. So dd can either stick with dance or try something else.
Other than the time investment, classes are expensive and we just to have funds to support multiple activities for multiple kids.
Right now we have private swim lessons and H is doing 4 weeks of skate lessons. We need to ask the kids if they want to do spring soccer or try another sport instead.
I really want H to take piano lessons, but I have been hesitant to add it into our schedule. T has been asking for Gymkhana, so that would either be before or after a spring sport. Not at the same time.
T does a soccer skills class and a Spanish class at daycare, but since they don't cost us any time, I don't really count them.
T-ball and soccer at the same time sounds like too much to me. I don't think that much commitment will be fun for a 5 year old.
We have this same problem with T. Mornings are hell in our house. We've tried everything, and it's just not getting any better.
She's been taking gymnastics since a few weeks after school started. She really likes it, but I'm not a fan of the fact that it's smack dab in the middle of our Saturdays. We'll keep doing it though because she likes it and it gives her some exercise. She took swim lessons over the summer. I think one activity/sport at a time is enough for us and her.
I'm also not a parent that wants to run every night and all weekend long for kids' activities. I've seen a lot of people do it and drive all over Pittsburgh for games. I think that's too much for young kids.
Needless to say, we are sticking to the one thing at a time for right now, due mostly to my laziness. Not sure what we'll do later on if things overlap or he shows an interest in more than one, we'll cross that bridge when we get there.
Jake - 1.15.08
Liam - 5.17.11
Outside of karate classes that Gavin didn't start until he was almost 6, flag football this past Fall was our first experience with an organized sport. It was through i9 sports and was Saturday mornings only - practice from 9-10a and game from 10-11a. Gavin LOVED it. We want to sign him up for the Spring session, but are waiting to find out DH's work schedule. It's just too much for me to entertain 2 other kids at a field for 2 hrs, and I'm not leaving Gavin there by himself.
That said, I would stick with the swim lessons and ONE sport. I think adding a sport that meets 3x a week is ridiculous at this young age, unless it's something she likes and is the only thing you're juggling. (And yes, I say that for selfish reasons as well!)
As much as Gavin loves getting out of the house (he sulks when I won't take him grocery shopping with me bc I want to be alone and get it done faster!), there's also something to be said about time at home or at the park playing.
Good luck with your decision!
My three sons!
She will have 4 weeknights that she has stuff and then Saturday game. At least it's just a few months. I'm going to see how it goes. Maybe she will only like 1 so it won't be an issue again. And I'm going to push for 1 thing a session again. I'm hoping if its too much for dd that she can express that to him. Maybe he will listen to her since he clearly won't ever listen to me about this.
I agree with Amy - what is your evening schedule like without all of this? 4 nights and one Saturday for a 5-yr old? Like I said, there's something to be said about having home time, no matter boring it is!
I usually just state what I would/wouldn't do and leave it at that, but I'm going to share that I hope your DH realizes that this is a LOT to expect from a child, especially one who struggles to get out the door as it is.
I truly do applaud your DH's commitement to being involved in DD's life and I'm sure he feels it will be good time spent with her, but I'd hate for you all to make the commitment to doing this, then have her fail bc she's just not physically ready to take on so much. You know your DD best, but I don't want her to feel bad about herself because she's just not ready, you know?
My three sons!
We are not sports people. We don't want to be crazy running around splitting the family all the time to attend events for multiple children. We have decided we were not pushing sports but that if they want to try them we would let them. Adam is not a super sporty/physical kid.
I kinda pushed him into Little kickers soccer in the spring which was only sat for 2 hrs for 10 weeks. I wanted him to try it out and be on a team and get some physical activity in. I can't say he was thrilled, he did ok, or as well as most of the kids. I don't think his heart was in it- but he wanted the trophy. We declined fall because of school starting and the baby and all the new routines we needed to start. I asked if he wanted to do it in spring and he says " no thanks. I already have a trophy."
I would like for him to do swim because it is a life skill to have, but up to this point he WILL NOT agree to go. Even so it is only a week or 2 at our pool in the summer when school is off the table.
Currently we have Kindermusik Thursdays at 4:30. And CCD Tuesdays at 4:15. and I need every min of my mon and wed for down time and house and shopping. I am enjoying not having a sat place to be.
We started Adam in Kindermusik at 6 months because he was a stay at home only child and we wanted him to have interaction. I intended to drop it when he started preschool because we wouldn't need the interaction aspect. He really enjoys it and has wanted to continue. We are able to do it so we do. It only goes to age 7 then you pursue private lessons.
We have signed up Ian he starts tomorrow, but DH will be taking him Tuesdays at 9:20 am while Adam is in school.
.I really can't imagine doing more, I am not sure how people that work "normal " hours and have more than one or two kids do it.
Married, September 23, 2006
I am assuming that it will be quick dinners thrown together as soon as I get home. Dd and I get home a little after 5 so I'll have a little time. Assuming dd can get herself ready.
I'm fully expecting this to suck but it isn't forever. And if it is too much I will absolutely push to stop soccer. But unfortunately this is the life dh was used to and finds nothing wrong with it. Whereas I didn't and I think it is WAY too much for a 5 year old especially our dd. honestly I am hoping this blows up in his face a little. I've tried talking to him about this stuff. He is over the top with everything and it drives me nuts. He pushes dd way too much. I appreciate he is an involved dad but again we are very different in parenting styles.