Cleaning was always a weird thing when I was growing up. Mom was very unstable at the time and there'd be weekends of just yelling and crying and trashbags throwing out everything. I was a very messy child, procrastinated cleaning up anything and there's more to it than that, but close enough. Luckily, that's all done, but it's taken me moving into my own place with FI to realize that I don't need a spotless house, just a relatively tidy one.
When we started dating, FI always spouted off about how clean a guy he was, how his room was never ever messy and he could never live in the mess that my room was normally in. I feel terrible because I kind of brought that lifestyle with me when I moved in with him (I tried so hard to stay organized... our place is just tiny though), and he's told me that he just kind of gave up cleaning after a few months. Which I told him I understood, but I try to keep my clothing mess to my side of our room and out of his way, and I do what I can when I have the time... then he had to change jobs and his days off, so we don't have days off in common anymore. We resorted to a chores list so that we each had a checklist to get done while the other had to work, but that's fallen by the wayside...
So now he just doesn't do any housework at all. It's been at least two weeks since he cleaned the kitchen, and he's started laundry but just leaves it around... so now I'm messy, but he's just on a while new level of messy. And it's driving. me. bonkers. So I've started trying to do at least one chore every evening we're home, just to keep it under control. Every time I mention it, he gets a total attitude and says that I have no room to chide him with how unorganized I am... but now he's in the extreme and has just thrown in the proverbial clean house towel! And I don't really blame him...
How do I get this back under control? It's stressful and disheartening and I just want a tidy house, not a spotless one.
Re: Getting FI to Clean Now That I'm Onboard