Where to start?

BostonTerrior2008 · February 2014

Hi ladies! I apologize already, my I pad will not post paragraphs, so sorry for a massive paragraph this will be. Ihave lurked here a few times in the past and see that there is some good info that you give. I am trying to get our family on a budget, and am finding it hard to even begin. Please bear with me, I feel stupid when it comes to this and i am trying to seek advice. I tracked our spending for two months and we noticed that there is nothing we can cut in our spending (we went out to eat twice in two months, and had a pizza party with our child's friends) besides that I have cooked everything from home. We have not gone to movies, extra curricular things, decreased driving times, by reducing number of trips to the store, unnecessary trips to places, we really do not do much. It is almost depressing. We do have one huge expense that was our choice this year - tuition for private education. We are trying to do school of choice (again) next year, our school system we live in is horrible. If we can not get school of choice, I do not know what we will do. We can not move at this point in time. I have read Ramsey's TOtal Money Makeover, and I understand the concept of it, but my question is how do you begin doing it, when as soon as you get paid, that income is gone already just to keep up on bills? By the end of the month, there is nothing left after all bills are paid and food on the table, and gas for cars. Do you default on a bill? That does not seem logical. How do you "pay yourself" if there is no money for essential bills?sorry if I sound dumb. I have been on a job search for a few months now, with no luck. I have been substitute teaching infrequently, BUT I am picking up another part time job in a few weeks (I am going through the interview process, know the hiring person -my former boss- and he said that I will be hired, I just need to go through the process). This will help, though it is just min wage job. So, I will have income over the summer to supplement DH. I like the concept of DR, but was wondering if there is something similar/better to refer to? I am so sorry for all the questions, like I said, I feel at a loss with this. I truly appreciate any suggestions, as I said, I do not feel knowledgeable when it comes to budget.

crystaldbl · February 2014

Check out your cable/ internet & cell phone plans. See if you can cut back any in those areas. Use coupons when grocery shopping. What about using your tax refund to pay for school? Check with the school about any programs they may have to help in financial hardships. I have a friend who gets help from the school with her kids tuiton. She also got a discount on tuiton for becoming a member at the church the school is associated with.

BostonTerrior2008 · February 2014

We do not have cable. Use a tv antenna for basic channels. We have and will again apply for scholarship, in case we do not get school of choice.....but last year we were awarded barely anything, I will be seeing what more I can do for next year. We do belong to the adjoining church. Internet, I called our provider and got it reduced $20/mo and will call every six months to renew that rate. I do use coupons, and buy what is cheaper generic vs. name brand. Cell phones, we could look into that. I have a basic old school flip phone, no data, DH has an I phone that he needs for work and gets a discount from his employer. Could look into that a bit more.

vlagrl29 · February 2014

If you can't cut anything because you are already being frugal which it seems you are, honestly you need more income coming in. Can the part time job be a full time job for you? That would help. I'm the type of person that would rather work more so I can stress less about money.

Xstatic3333 · February 2014

vlagrl29 said:
If you can't cut anything because you are already being frugal which it seems you are, honestly you need more income coming in. Can the part time job be a full time job for you? That would help. I'm the type of person that would rather work more so I can stress less about money.

Ditto this-it sounds like your best approach is to increase your income. If you already work with kids, why not do some babysitting? Maybe you could find some jobs through church connections. I'd also look into other private schools that might have scholarship programs, and perhaps charter schools. If some of your bills are CCs and you have a good payment history, you could also call and ask about interest rate reductions.

Two blogs that I read give pretty good tips about extreme frugal living. You might find them interesting. They are sixfiguresunder.com and frugalfarmer.com. Like I said it gets pretty extreme, but it's interesting and you can take or leave what you want.

BostonTerrior2008 · February 2014

Thanks ladies.....my H and I just talked about trying to get our car insurance lowered. We pay a lot for that. We will look into that, I feel we pay too much, considering neither of us have had a ticket/infraction in over 10 years. But we are in a high rate state. . I should have a second income soon, more steady than what I have now, and between my two part time jobs and DH's job it will help. I will admit a lot of the debt occurred because I was very sick. In the span of fthe past five years, I had to have eight major surgeries, and two minor, and many very expensive medications, I was in and out of doctor offices almost weekly (co-pays add up fast also).....DH's insurance was ok through work, but not the greatest, even afte hitting the deductible we still had to pay 20%)...after all said and done H and I estimated that we spent nearly 30,000 in my medical bills alone, not including prescription, co-pay, etc) let alone DD's health issues. we also had a major issue with one if our cars that we had to pay a lot for.....due to life's unfortunate events, we had to rack up two major credit cards just to get by, not loose the house, pay utilities, and put food on the table, and meet our child's basic and health needs. Not the best thing to do, but we did what we thought that was the right thing at the time.....I wish we would have asked to take a loan from my parents instead, but what is done is done. During that time, I could not work, so that hurt tremendously. In the past year, I am finally to the point where I can work, and be more productive for our family. Hense why I am looking for a second job.,,,,,and will continue to search for full time work. I know that things will get better, but just need to get this budget thing going on the right track. I now want/need to plan better in case if something like that happens again. I want to have a fresh start and starting by taking baby steps to get rid if the rest of the lingering credit card payments (we were able to get all medical expenses paid last year

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vlagrl29 · February 2014

I'm so sorry about all those medical bills! I thank god every day our family is healthy because that shit's expensive! Could you not put it on a medical loan where the interest was 0-1%. That would have been much cheaper than credit cards.

Regarding car insurance - have you been with the same company for a long time? I was with american family since I was 17 and we just switched everything to state farm a couple years ago because it was so much cheaper. The more you stay with an insurance company the more expensive it gets over the years because of rate increases. We are the same way with health insurance. We buy our own and switch it every couple years to keep costs down.

hoffse · February 2014

My suggestion would be to drop the private school until you guys can increase income/lower debt and get back on your feet.

I know it's not what you want to hear, but it sounds like the single largest discretionary expense you have right now.

Look, I get it - because I attended school in a terrible public school district. My school district was dealing with a massive influx of immigrants during a time when most teachers in the district didn't speak Spanish. It took a lot of time/energy from the teachers, and it generated a lot of hostility in the student body because the social groups were so very different. I watched more than one student be taken to the hospital from fights. We were searched by the police (with dogs, no less) on a semi-regular basis. And I still went to Vanderbilt for undergrad on a big scholarship. And then I went to Vanderbilt again for law school, also on a scholarship.

You know what? I wouldn't change that school experience for anything because it taught me a lot about the world. I was a serious racial minority (as a white girl) when I graduated, and that's something a lot of upper-middle-class white folks never experience and therefore can never understand. Not to mention it taught me to deal and get along with people of all different backgrounds and upbringings.

My mother spent a LOT of time with me getting me ahead academically. I don't think I actually learned anything in school until 4th grade. And then not again until 6th grade. I had a handful of really spectacular teachers over the years, but at the end of the day the vast majority of them were kind of terrible and spent more time trying to discipline than teaching. But you can still have high academic standards and expectations as a parent if the teachers are bad or distracted - there's no reason you have to just leave it up to teachers.

If you are working part-time, try to arrange your shifts so that you are home with your child during the afternoon, and work to keep him/her ahead yourself. Financially, this should absolutely free up some cash. And perhaps you can go back to private school when your finances have stabilized.

I just want to point out that attending a bad public school is absolutely not a death sentence academically. If the parents care about education, kids will do just fine, and they might learn some valuable life lessons along the way.

MommyLiberty5013 · February 2014

What are the loans that you have? Mortgage? Cars? Tell us what you owe and the rates and payments...you may be able to refi for a lower rate and therefore a lower payment.

Is your DH able to put his antennae out for a new job in his field? Maybe he could also try for a higher paying job.

moonprincessd · February 2014

Maybe instead of private school, could you do home school? Home schooling isn't just at home anymore. There are groups out there so you could still work while your child is at "home school" (usually a teacher with around 5-10 students). Otherwise you might just have to go to public school.

Another option is to become an extreme couponer. It takes a LOT of time, so I don't mess with it. I do clip coupons and I often go to Rainbow on double coupon days, which is awesome. I've gotten things free a few times when they matched up with store sales. I just don't go out of my way to get multiple coupons of the same item.

Another cheap grocery store is Aldi's, you have to use your own bags though. They also don't take coupons, but in general their items are a lot cheaper compared to those in Walmart or grocery stores. So if you don't want to spend time couponing, Aldi's would save you some money.

vlagrl29 · February 2014

Is it possible to move somewhere where the school districts are much better?

KatieCutie05 · February 2014

The key to the Dave Ramsey plan is the budget, without that nothing else will work. You need to do more then simply track expenses, you need to tell your money where to go each and every month and then stick to it and make sure you follow it as best you can. If you do that budget and you are spending more then your bringing in then you need to get your spending down. The great thing about the zero based budget is that every dollar counts. Do the budget!!!! The forms are in the back of the book.

strickland8052 · February 2014

So sorry to hear about your medical issues! Maybe you should try listing all your expenses here? You could be overspending on something, and other nesties might be able to help make suggestions. If Dave Ramsey isn't making sense to you, there are some other good money folks. I prefer Suze Orman. There is also a Smart Couples Finish Rich book that is supposed to be really good.

Where to start?

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