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Our Little Raspberry-Born 3/27/12
We Said I Do 09/06/09
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Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Win and Whine Wednesday
in GP Moms
Add as many wins and whines as you would like here!
">">Our Little Raspberry-Born 3/27/12
We Said I Do 09/06/09
We love our Frankie Dog (5yo pit) and our Paco Kitty Dx Endo 12/09 Lupron 3/10-9/10 BFP 08/11 Bday 3/27/12 Lap Surgery 2/26/13
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Re: Win and Whine Wednesday
Whine-it isn't until 3. So late.
Win-Today is payday and grocery shopping!
Whine-After the play date so we are going to be out late.
Whine-I have homework tonight. One of my classes stresses me out because no matter how hard I try the teacher nitpicks every little thing and I cannot get an A in this class. It is frustrating because I am learning so much from the class and trying so hard but every time there is something.
Win-I am starting week 3 of the class and it is only 5 weeks long so not too much longer.
Our Little Raspberry-Born 3/27/12
We Said I Do 09/06/09
BFP 2: 7/7/2014 Beta 7/8: 115, Beta 7/12: 638, Beta 7/16: 3793, Beta 7/21: 21,625
Yesterday here in Colorado a family dog bit a 1 year old baby. The baby was air lifted to Children's Hospital, with severe injuries. When the neighbors were asked how the dog was one neighbor said that the owner had said the dog was aggressive towards other dogs.
That turned a light bulb in my head and got me thinking. My dog is aggressive with other dogs. If she sees a dog she goes nuts and if the dog barks she gets in defensive mode.
I obviously never leave DD alone in a room with my dog but accidents can happen at any moment.
I am thinking that I need to get rid of my dog. I love her and it hurts me so much to think of doing it but, I love my daughter more and if anything happens to isis because I didn't pay attention to the warning signs I would really hate myself.
Sorry for my big whine but that's all I got. :'(
I tried taking her to petsmarts training and that was a huge fail.
Whine: I have to sub in kindergarten ALL.DAY tomorrow. This happens sometimes when they are short on subs. They cancel all my music classes and have me sub. I love teaching kindergarten music but also love having a different group of kids every thirty minutes. I'll be with the same kids all day. Lord be with me!
TTC #1 since July 2012
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EDD: June 25, 2014
Baby Girl born via induction June 26, 2014
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@bridget0117 - It would be INCREDIBLY unfair to your dog to give her up just because some OTHER dog who was stated to be dog aggressive bit a young child. That situation has absolutely no bearing on your dog, whatsoever. Dogs are individuals and they react differently.
You owe it to yourself and your dog to properly train her and work with a behaviorist (this is NOT just a trainer) to sort through aggression issues and get her more comfortable in a multitude of situations. I'm sorry, but pet owners who jump straight to thinking of getting rid of their pet (even though they just love them so much!) without DOING everything they can first make me really angry. I've see way too many people dump their "beloved" pet at the first sign of an issue without taking the time or making the effort to correct it.
B/w 1/8: betas 17,345, progesterone 25.6
I thought about giving her up because of what happened with the other dog but never said I actually would. Even if I do decide to give her up it wouldn't be an easy decision and I hope I won't get flamed for it because we obviously did what was best for our family.
Like I said, we tried the petsmart training and it was a fail. With all the other dogs around she couldn't even stay still. She almost bit a dog because he smelled her butt area.
This is my first dog/pet ever. I have absolutely no clue what I am doing but I am trying my best . I actually never even knew the difference between a trainer and a behaviorist. I have even been told that my dog has separation anxiety but I never knew how to try and take care of that.
After researching, I found a behaviorist in my area that I would love to give a try. The classes won't start for a few months but I'm not giving up on her just yet.
DH and I will work hard with her and if we see no change then we will decide what to do.
Honestly, I never knew aggression issues can be worked on and fixed until @dangermuffin23 suggested it. Just like a FTM I am a FTDO and trying my best at deciding the best for my pup. I do LOVE her very much and I know it's unfair to give her up but if at the end nothing works I might have to and at least I can say we tried everything we could.
Yes, it comes down to doing what you feel is best, but I truly don't believe considering giving up a dog because she's aggressive to other dogs and has never shown the least aggression to a person is justifiable.
I know families who have a dog or dogs with issues, some of whom have had children in the last couple of years. They educated themselves on dog behavior and worked with a behaviorist and/or trainer to get past the worst of the issues, if possible. If not possible, they do their utmost to keep the dog out of whatever situation may set them off, and obviously never let the child and dog(s) interact without supervision (that is extremely important in EVERY family, not just households in which the dog has a known issue).
There are ALWAYS options to try next.
What kind of dog do you have? When does she become aggressive? Who told you she might have separation anxiety? Have you every experienced anything to lead you to believe this might be the case? There are wonderful books available for helping to understand dogs/dog behavior/separation anxiety/etc.
Google NILIF (Nothing In Life Is Free). Sometimes establishing yourselves FIRMLY as the ones in charge of absolutely everything in the dog's world can help calm aggression, because the dog learns that YOU will handle and take care of every situation and she doesn't need to get worked up. We use NILIF with our Boxer (we're first-time dog owners too!!) and she has been a DREAM. She knows she gets nothing without doing what we want her to first. That doesn't mean you make the dog jump through hoops just for a pat on the head, but it means you decide when to initiate playtime (not when the dog comes up to you with a toy), you decide when the dog gets to eat her meal (we make Zoey sit and wait until we say it's okay to eat; she'll sit there forever), you determine when to give love and cuddles (and this can be as often as you want, just make sure it's YOU calling the dog over for it and not her asking for it).
If she DOES have separation anxiety, "I'll be Home Soon" is a fantastic book for helping understand and cope with it. If you're not sure she has SA, she's probably not severe enough to need meds, just a few environmental cues/adjustments to make her feel more comfortable. But for other dogs, meds are a lifesaver. I know a couple of fantastic dog owners whose dogs need anxiety meds ALL the time because their anxiety is so severely crippling in all situations. The meds, along with dedicated training with tons of positive reinforcement help the dogs get through stressful situations to them without going nuts or shutting down.
I could go on longer, but I think this has gotten way long enough, lol! PLEASE message me anytime to talk about things you can do. I really, REALLY don't think you need to even think about giving up your dog.
B/w 1/8: betas 17,345, progesterone 25.6
I too, don't think I need to give her up just yet. I am going to try those books you mentioned and try that out.
I have a 3 year old shar pei. She's very sweet but she gets jealous whenever she hears someone talking cute to DD and runs over all crazy. She pulls me all.the.time and basically takes me on walks. She takes trash out of the trash can when we aren't home. She rubs her nose on the carpet and has made herself bleed. She scratches doors after we lock the door. She also is aggressive with my younger nephew, she will bite him but not bite down and hurt him but she does get angry. I know he messes with her so I try not to think she's bad because of that.
I honestly think that with the right trainer or behaviorist she can be an amazing dog I just never really looked into it other than the petsmart thing.
In our case it ended up that he was just aggressive with unleashed dogs when he was on a leash. We just avoid those situations because clearly it stresses him out.
Our Little Raspberry-Born 3/27/12
We Said I Do 09/06/09
Shar peis can be difficult, but it sounds like NILIF will be a HUGE help in many ways, especially in her excitability when people are paying attention to others.
Start teaching her a "leave it" command to apply to things like the trash can and anything else you don't want her getting into. She'll learn what's off limits. Getting a different trash can with a locking lid or stashing it somewhere she can't readily access will also solve that problem.
Try either a Gentle Leader or an Easy Walk Harness for going on walks. These redirect the dog sideways when she tries to pull. Using one of this along with stopping dead and/or turning around (no more forward motion like she wants) until she STOPS pulling, are how you train a dog not to drag you on walks. It takes a lot of patience and time. Some walks you might not even make it a block. Keep the leash SUPER short so she can't get away from your side and teach her a "heel" command so she knows she is expected to walk BESIDE you and not pulling ahead of you.
Working on commands at home like "sit," "stay" and "come" will all help get them stronger in her mind so she'll listen when you tell her to do something outside the home, too.
And KEEP HER AWAY from your nephew!! If he's antagonizing her and she bites him hard enough to cause damage, she's the one who's going to be punished for it. If he can't be taught how to properly interact with her, then he is never allowed near her. PERIOD. That situation sounds like a disaster waiting to happen, and she's given obvious signals that she does not like whatever it is he's doing. Nipping him is her escalated signal that he needs to back off and leave her alone. If necessary, establish somewhere she can go when she's feeling overwhelmed that NO ONE is allowed to go bother her in (a crate, a bed in a corner, etc).
B/w 1/8: betas 17,345, progesterone 25.6
I did start hiding the trash lol. We also tried Gentle Leader, it didn't work. Right now we have a choke chain and it works sometimes. She is so strong and if she even smells a dog behind a door she goes crazy! I read somewhere that making them walk beside you or behind you shows them we are the boss. We have been trying that and I always walk out the door before she does.
She really knows and understands when I say leave it or stop or no but it's like when I'm not home she doesn't care. I try to make her wit for a treat and she starts jumping and running so I don't give her treat.
I will honestly try everything you mentioned and take her to a behaviorist and give it my all. My house wouldn't be the same without her.
Thanks so much lucky
I'm MORE than happy to help when it comes to pet advice!
One last thing: if she's getting into trouble when you're gone, then in my opinion, she never "earned" the right to free roam of the house. Zoey had to, in essence, earn her freedom when we're gone; before that, she was crated whenever we left.
We did make sure to properly crate train her and always give her a special treat when we closed her in it. Once she was around a year old and we'd worked to train her on a lot of things, we started letting her stay out of the crate when we'd go on quick trips from the house. There were some incidences (a chewed up remote control or papers if they got left on the couch instead of a table), but it didn't take too long for her to earn the right to stay out of the crate whenever we left, no matter how long. We KNOW now she won't bother anything while we're gone.
B/w 1/8: betas 17,345, progesterone 25.6
Absolutely! Old dogs CAN learn new tricks!! You have to break old habits in some cases, but it's just as doable as with a puppy.
Here is the link to the Pets Board FAQs on training and behavior (https://sites.google.com/site/petsboardfaqs/home/training-and-behavior), which includes a ton of links to different things. This information was the foundation for everything we did with our dog. Just act like you're starting from scratch with a puppy.
It will be a lot of work, but a couple of 10-minutes sessions EVERY DAY will add up. Shar peis aren't stupid, so she'll figure things out quickly if you're completely consistent.
B/w 1/8: betas 17,345, progesterone 25.6