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Afraid for my sister and nephews
My sister and her husband have been together for 18 years, married for 14. They have two sons, 3 and 5 years old. A year and a half ago, my sister had an affair. It lasted a few months and she has acknowledged the damage she's done and sought reconciliation with her husband. They went to couples counseling for almost a year to work things through. Of course, the affair was not the beginning of problems between them.
My brother-in-law has undiagnosed mental illness, I'm certain. As a therapist, I observe anxiety and depression and his emotional control is nonexistant. Over the last year and a half, his mood has been all over the place- one minute apologetic and tearful about driving my sister into another man's arms and the next, raging at her about how horrible she is. My husband and I married in October and, as a distraction, he decided my husband paid too much attention to his children (while he as a father pretty much ignored them when we were at family gatherings) and that meant my husband is a pedophile. My husband handled this with amazing patience and was more concerned about how it affected me, letting it roll off his back because it's simply delusional.
My sister called me this morning and disclosed that her husband is raging at home- throwing things, breaking things, and (she says for the first time) he pushed her. The children were home, though I don't know where in the house they were. I know she needs to get out, or get him to get out. This is getting worse and now, he's crossed the line from verbal and emotional abuse to phsyical abuse. I'm afraid it won't stop and someone will get hurt. Of course, she's asked me not to tell anyone, but I can't carry this burden alone. I shared the information with one of my brothers, but we feel powerless to do anything.
I guess I'm sharing this for support and any ideas about what to do. other than share information with my sister about domestic violence and restraining orders. Thank you for reading this.
Re: Afraid for my sister and nephews
It's imperative your BIL need not know where she is; she needs to leave and forward no new address. Let her attorney contact him; I am most certain he will NOT disclose her whereabouts. Anything that has to do with the divorce your BIL is to speak to his attorney who will contact your sister's attorney.