Let's Talk About Sex...Education!

nightmare_of_beauty · April 2014

Since everyone is saying that we need more things to talk about, figured I'd pick a topic that can be seen as controversial and post it and get some talk going. I know quiet a few ladies on here are teachers, so I thought sex education would be a good topic.

How do you think sex education should be handled in school? Do you plan to do different education for your child? Do you remember anything about your sex education you would change or liked?

KonaCoffeeBean · April 2014

I think my public school sex ed was adequate. Basically, in 5th grade we learned about puberty, 7th grade anatomy and conception, and 9th grade contraception and STDs. Basic lesson was that abstinence is the safest emotionally and physically, but here are the other options for safer sex. The best part was the 1960s film on menses and the uncomfortable giggling. Loved that.

lfk2013 · April 2014

I think it should be taught...all of it, and not just abstinence only. I remember being traumatized watching a video of a birth as a young teenager. Of course, that was back when my school system didn't have to be as politically correct. My sister went through the same system 5 years after I did and she said there was no movie. I think I'd try and teach my kids the technical terms for their body parts and to not be afraid to say them. To this day, I still feel uncomfortable saying them, mostly because my mom taught me as a kid that they were bad words (oh how I love the deep South).

nightmare_of_beauty · April 2014

My sex education was kind of nothing. In 5th grade they taught us about puberty, 8th it was anatomy, conception, and STDs. I never learned contraceptives. At home, my older sisters told me what mom told them, so my mom never gave me a sex talk.

I honestly, once the internet came out I talk to a lot of older guys in chat rooms and learned everything about sex.

I would like to be able to create an open discussion with my kids about sex.

I wish my school had talked about contraceptives. I didn't know anything, but the pill till college.

sweetpotato123 · April 2014

I think it should absolutely be taught in schools, but I also think as a parent you are responsible for ensuring your children are comfortable with the topic, understand it all and understand pros/cons of sex.

I know you can't predict your relationship with your children, but I know we will do everything we can to help our kids be comfortable coming to us with questions and always have an open door policy.

LooneyLife · April 2014

My school teaching was adequate. I learned what I needed and no more to complicate things.

I did not have a separate parental teaching. My mom stopped me after school and said something to the affect of "I know you had a special class today, do you have any questions about what they taught?" I didn't, and she told me I could come to her at any time if I did. I've always been very self taught though. If I wanted to know something (about any topic) I just looked it up.

When I got my first period, I used the supplies they gave is in our special box at school and then walked myself to the store and bought more with my allowance. NBD.

ETA: I think every kid is different and I will have to wait and see their personality, maturity, and learning style before I decide how I'd like to teach them.

sparklingdiamond · April 2014

I remember having the talk about puberty in like 5th grade and then another talk (which mainly focused on STDs with really gross pictures) when I was in 9th grade I think. I honestly don't remember what all we learned. But my mom taught me about sex when I was younger and was always open to me asking questions, which I really appreciated.

brij2006 · April 2014

I think ours was the puberty talk in 5th grade, then sex/STD's in 8th grade.

One thing I will definitely do differently is be open with my kids about it. My parents never ever talked about sex with me or gave me the "safe sex" talk. H and I started dating at a young age and my mom just asked me if I wanted to get on BC because of my horrible periods. Honestly, getting on it that young enabled us.

Otherwise the only talk was about abstinence and our youth group gave all of us purity rings to save ourself for marriage. Haha!

I think it's up to the parents to have the discussion about sex in general, but the schools assist in showing what can happen if you aren't careful or have multiple partners.

nfp147 · April 2014

I think it's a responsibility that needs to be shared between parents and schools.

We had sex ed starting in grade 5, which would have been about 30 years ago for me, so I have no clue what we learned. I recall that the boys and girls were separated.

My parents were always open to questions and comfortable about talking. I suspect I probably learned a lot from friends as well.

My Dad made the day my sister and I got our periods very special. We were allowed to stay home from school and he took us shopping for a gift. I remember buying a sparkly pink shirt.

lfk2013 · April 2014

nfp147 said:
My Dad made the day my sister and I got our periods very special. We were allowed to stay home from school and he took us shopping for a gift. I remember buying a sparkly pink shirt.

This is awesome! My dad started crying and I couldn't understand why at the time.

mrsskiz · April 2014

I cant remember much besides they taught abstinance very throughly. That was in the 90's when the schools didnt want to " enable us".

DS is almost 12 and has really been easy on us so far. He will ask questions here and there and we are totally upfront and honest with him about it all. We only answer his actual question so we dont overwhem him. Slowly over the course of the last 2 years or so we have talked about how babies are born, that it takes a sperm and an egg to make a baby, but that it doesnt always have to mean that is necessarily a momma and a dad that raise the baby. So we have discussed sperm banks, donor eggs and serrogates. The only thing he hasnt really asked about yet is the actual process of procreation. I think he knows from conversations that traditionally it involves a penis and a vagina, but I dont think he fully understands the "how". Once hes ready he will ask.

LuckyAngel07 · April 2014

I remember having some sort of class in 5th grade about sex and/or puberty. Probably more about puberty and body part development. I honestly don't remember if we were taught anything more through 8th grade, but I know there was some discussion of it in high school health. I don't remember anything specific.

I know our mom talked to us about getting our period, and I was (how ironic) pretty excited when I got my first one; I told my mom right away. She always made herself available if we had questions about tampons or things, but I don't remember there ever being a real discussion about sex, other than I think I was too scared to even try it, but I don't know if that's from something she said or just my mentality. In any case, by the time I got around to it, I knew about condoms, and they got used.

My dad was always more open about it, but until college. He flat out asked if DH and I were having sex (we'd been dating a couple of years by that time, I think) and if we used protection/what kind. He was fine with it, as long as I was protected, and that's when I started BCPs.

I'm hoping I don't feel too embarrassed when the time comes to teach my own children about their bodies and being safe.

BruinsBabe33 · April 2014

Sex education is a joke and I will make sure my children get facts from me and that we are able to have an open dialogue about it.

I was taught abstinence or hell.

seahorse01 · April 2014

KonaCoffeeBean said:

I think my public school sex ed was adequate. Basically, in 5th grade we learned about puberty, 7th grade anatomy and conception, and 9th grade contraception and STDs. Basic lesson was that abstinence is the safest emotionally and physically, but here are the other options for safer sex. The best part was the 1960s film on menses and the uncomfortable giggling. Loved that.

This was the same for me,

KonaCoffeeBean · April 2014

I also got a lot of information from Seventeen magazine and Degrassi High episodes.

Apollo11235 · April 2014

I think it's good that schools have some form of sex education since many parents do an inadequate job or avoid it altogether. However, I wish that teachers were better trained to do a great job with it (or better yet, that we had programs to help parents do a better job).

With our kids, I hope to be able to have an open dialogue and start early, with age-appropriate discussion from the first year through adulthood.

poppies717 · April 2014

Public school education. I remember the boys going to recess while we got the puberty talk and vice versa. In HS, there was actually a pg freshman in my class, so it terrified me into thinking I'd get pregnant if I had sex (oh, the irony). I think I learned more from my friends and my parents being smart about talking to me. My mom said, "Wait until you know he's worth it. Use a condom." I was 18. He wasn't worth it, but we did use a condom!

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