Pittsburgh Nesties
Luckystar2
member
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Help: getting kid ready for school
I swear I post this every 6 months or so...so here I am again. Dd is very strong willed/stubborn. Getting ready for daycare was usually a challenge too and has been since she was old enough to start getting ready herself.
Getting ready for school is bad. At least with daycare we didn't have the pressure of making the bus! Everyday she whines about not wanting to go to school. She doesn't love school but when I ask her if there is a specific problem there doesn't seem to be.
Yet every morning she struggles. She goes to bed between 7:45-8 and alarm goes off at 6:30. I really can't get her to bed any earlier. And can't wake her up later. She spends a half hour whining and just not doing anything despite multiple prodding a by us. Then she finally gets ready and it's a race every day to make the bus. Today she finally missed it (can't believe it hasn't happened before).
I don't know what to do anymore. She makes me want to pull out my hair! We have tried reward charts with moderate success. I even made up a new one to start again this morning but that clearly didn't work. Yelling, threatening, explaining how it affects us making us late for work doesn't work. I am so sick of this. Dh and I end up fighting about it too. I swear this kid tests my patience every single second! After 5 years of fighting her to get ready I am at the end of my rope!!!
Advice?
Getting ready for school is bad. At least with daycare we didn't have the pressure of making the bus! Everyday she whines about not wanting to go to school. She doesn't love school but when I ask her if there is a specific problem there doesn't seem to be.
Yet every morning she struggles. She goes to bed between 7:45-8 and alarm goes off at 6:30. I really can't get her to bed any earlier. And can't wake her up later. She spends a half hour whining and just not doing anything despite multiple prodding a by us. Then she finally gets ready and it's a race every day to make the bus. Today she finally missed it (can't believe it hasn't happened before).
I don't know what to do anymore. She makes me want to pull out my hair! We have tried reward charts with moderate success. I even made up a new one to start again this morning but that clearly didn't work. Yelling, threatening, explaining how it affects us making us late for work doesn't work. I am so sick of this. Dh and I end up fighting about it too. I swear this kid tests my patience every single second! After 5 years of fighting her to get ready I am at the end of my rope!!!
Advice?
Re: Help: getting kid ready for school
Waking up in the morning is very difficult for me (regardless of how much or how little sleep I get), so some of the things that I do is to sleep with my curtains open so that any amount of morning light will help wake me up. I use an alarm clock that gradually gets louder. I also try to time my wake up so that I am waking up in between sleep cycles. (there's a website that will calculate it for me - I can't think of it off the top of my head, but basically it's every 90 minutes).
I know she's tired in the morning, but what about waking her up a little earlier, even if it's just a few minutes to give you some extra time?
Send her to school as is in the morning. If it's PJ's and messy hair, then so be it.
Put her to bed in her clothes for the next day.
For the reward system, have you tried using a timer for each task that she needs to complete? If she is done before the timer = reward; if she is not = consequence.
Is there anything in the morning that she could look forward to once she is ready? (coloring, dancing to a song, etc.)
I try to avoid yelling/threatening at all costs, because I've found that not only makes the situation worse, but it stresses us all out.
If nothing is working, maybe try talking to the Pediatirican or behavoior specialist for ideas.
My three sons!
Also Meghan's idea of having her wear her clothes to bed...I actually did that a couple years ago. I may have to give that a try again. Maybe tell her she can do that or she needs to promise to get ready or she's going in her PJs.
Maybe I will fib and tell her I had to talk to the principal after she went to her room and how she can't be late, etc.
We have the same exact issues every morning. It's so infuriating. Of course, DH leaves when he has to leave, so I'm usually stuck dealing it with by myself.
I usually do a 1-2-3 countdown to try to get her moving. Occasionally I'll put a timer on and tell her that she has to be finished by the time the buzzer goes off.
If she's really slow-moving and not getting much accomplished, I take away that evening's TV/LeapPad/etc privileges. If she does what she has to do quickly and we have enough time, then sometimes I'll let her watch part of a show while I'm nursing the baby/finishing my stuff.
Some days are better than others
Yeah...I am wondering if school would be mad if she came in in PJs!
I don't feel like I have much to take away in the evening since we no longer do any tv during he week. We have always said that if she missed the bus she would have to spend the whole evening in her room but tonight is tball practice. As much as I would like to keep her home, dh is the coach and would not be pleased. Plus staying home would probably be a reward as she doesn't like practice!
My kid is food motivated so I think I may go back with positive reinforcement and using the reward chart to earn her Easter candy.
Oh and I've tried using a timer. I got a cute ladybug one. It only worked a few times in the past. Now she gets really annoyed when we use a timer or try to "race" who can get ready first.