October 2012 Weddings
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QOTD 4/28

There was a segment this morning on the Today Show that said that weddings were getting more and more expensive... for the guests!!! They said that a couple will spend, on average, about $600 to attend a wedding not including a gift. The average cost for a member of the wedding party is about $620 according to the study that they are using.

Do you think that you spend that much on a wedding as a guest? What about as a wedding party member? Do you think that guests and the wedding party spent the average to attend your wedding?
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Re: QOTD 4/28

  • I would say it depends on the wedding, but very likely yes, we have spent that much as a guest and most definitely as a member of the wedding party. Part of why we spend so much is because almost all of the weddings we attend are out of town. I was in weddings three summers in a row and they were all in my hometown, 600+ miles from where we live, so I spent probably more than the average to be in the weddings.

    I think a lot of our guests spent a good amount to attend our wedding. We also got married in my hometown and all of H's family and about half of the wedding party had to travel.

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  • H and I are going to a wedding next month for a friend who was in our wedding party. The wedding is in Michigan, so it involves us flying and getting a hotel room (we're only staying 1 night to keep costs as low as we can).

    Flights - almost $500 for both of us...why is it so expensive to fly DC to MI????
    Hotel - $110 (I think)...but free breakfast : ) LOL
    Rental car - $100
    Wedding gift- $100...I'd like to give more, but with all the other expenses, we just can't
    Grand total - over $600 : (

    Plus, I'm a BM in my friend's wedding in Nov. I'm sure I'll be spending at least $620 for the dress, and flight across country.

    H's cousin is getting married in TX in Sept, we have to RSVP no to that one because we just can't afford another wedding!



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  • Nic12184 said:
    Flights - almost $500 for both of us...why is it so expensive to fly DC to MI????

    Ugh, tell me about it! It is stupid expensive! We can't fly there for under $400.

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  • I'm honestly shocked by that statistic. But maybe I'm biased for getting away with much less for my guests.

    The last wedding I attended as a guest, we each bought new outfits (mine was $30 thanks to being on sale and an awesome clerk who rang up a coupon, not sure about h's), gave them cash (somewhere around $100), and had to drive into our home town for the reception and ceremony. We at least got lucky that my parents were away. They let us stay at their house since it was minutes away from the reception venue. So at most, around $200ish.

    Only two of my four bridesmaids went all out on my wedding day. Their dresses were 130. The money I got from them for the dresses went right back in to pay for their hair the day of--their's was $40, mine was $50. So, that equalled out to about $170? Maybe rounding it up to $200 with gas.
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  • I think for people that are local that's a bit high.  I think for wedding party that's probably pretty accurate.  It all depends on if you get a hotel room, most weddings in my area have cash bars so if you plan on getting drunk it can get pricey.  I think on average as a guest it probably cost about $300-$400 between gift, bar, and hotel/cab.

  • mana8503mana8503 member
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    It really depends on in town or out of town as a guest. But not counting gifts, it seems high to me. I've spent maybe $300 for a room and we drive everywhere.

    As a wedding party member, that's really low. The last wedding I was in I spend at least $1500 for shower, bachelorette party, dress, shoes, hair, make up... Not counting room and gift.
    Eliza Mae - September 16th, 2014

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  • WillyH19 said:


    Nic12184 said:
    Flights - almost $500 for both of us...why is it so expensive to fly DC to MI????


    Ugh, tell me about it! It is stupid expensive! We can't fly there for under $400.


    ---
    Dulles or bwi? We've gotten good flights out of bwi.

    What pissed me off was getting Jeff a flight from VA Beach to bwi. It was $400 cheaper to go up to Philly and back down. Wtf
    Eliza Mae - September 16th, 2014

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  • Wow, that seems like so much!!  I haven't been to many weddings but the few I have gone to were local.  We wore clothes we already owned and gave a cash gift of $100.  We may have spent $50 on gas but that only makes the total $150.

    Most of our guests for our wedding were locals as well, so they didn't have to travel but they were all generous with gifts.

    The BMs for our wedding probably spent about $150 for hair and dress. They wore shoes and jewelry they already owned and their makeup was done for free.  The GMs just rented suits but I don't know the cost.
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  • --- Dulles or bwi? We've gotten good flights out of bwi. What pissed me off was getting Jeff a flight from VA Beach to bwi. It was $400 cheaper to go up to Philly and back down. Wtf

    BWI for that one. We're flying Southwest, which I'm not a fan of but it was the cheapest option. We usually fly Jet Blue (where all of our frequent flyer points are), but apparently they don't fly from the DC area to Detroit. It's ridiculous that there's 3 airports to chose from, and flights are still outrageous!

    It stinks that all of our friends are spread out all over the country. It makes visiting so expensive!



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  • Nic12184 said:


    --- Dulles or bwi? We've gotten good flights out of bwi. What pissed me off was getting Jeff a flight from VA Beach to bwi. It was $400 cheaper to go up to Philly and back down. Wtf

    BWI for that one. We're flying Southwest, which I'm not a fan of but it was the cheapest option. We usually fly Jet Blue (where all of our frequent flyer points are), but apparently they don't fly from the DC area to Detroit. It's ridiculous that there's 3 airports to chose from, and flights are still outrageous!

    It stinks that all of our friends are spread out all over the country. It makes visiting so expensive!
    We usually fly SW out of BWI, but United just started a direct flight from Dulles. It is more expensive, but we live seriously 10 minutes from Dulles.

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  • For a local wedding, I think our average is probably about $300. But if we're staying at a hotel, easily $600. 

    $620 for a wedding party member (especially female), seems low.
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  • WillyH19 said:



    Nic12184 said:


    WillyH19 said:



    ---
    Dulles or bwi? We've gotten good flights out of bwi.

    What pissed me off was getting Jeff a flight from VA Beach to bwi. It was $400 cheaper to go up to Philly and back down. Wtf


    BWI for that one. We're flying Southwest, which I'm not a fan of but it was the cheapest option. We usually fly Jet Blue (where all of our frequent flyer points are), but apparently they don't fly from the DC area to Detroit. It's ridiculous that there's 3 airports to chose from, and flights are still outrageous!

    It stinks that all of our friends are spread out all over the country. It makes visiting so expensive!

    We usually fly SW out of BWI, but United just started a direct flight from Dulles. It is more expensive, but we live seriously 10 minutes from Dulles.


    ---
    We've used delta for our honeymoon and sw to get Jeff home from VA.

    I'll be asking you girls for help. My cw is getting married in MI next summer. I hope to go!
    Eliza Mae - September 16th, 2014

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  • DH and I have only been to one wedding since we have been together and it was his brothers. We probably spent around $650+ between bachelor party, tux rental, travel etc. I think that being a bridesmaid can be more expensive than that.

    For our wedding, our wedding party (ie DHs brother) probably paid around the same but that included a $70 suit, flight and rental car for the weekend since they were driving across Florida to go on a cruise.

    The other couples that came to the wedding, my parents paid their way so I wouldn't really know how much they spent.
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  • It depends if the b&g know me or DH. Mine tend to probably be that or more just including the flights back to the Midwest. If they are closer ca weddings, then a little less but there are still hotel costs.

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  • I think for local weddings that's high. 
    The last wedding I was in I spent about 200-300 for the day of (my dress was on sale) and maybe another 200 for bachelorette activities etc.

    There's a wedding OOT that I'm invited to in July and it will probably be about 500 to go. Outfit for me, H can wear his suit pants, hotel for 2 nights and food. I don't even know if we're going yet since it says adults only on the invite and I will have a brand new baby.

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  • I've never spent anywhere near that much money! The only wedding we've had to travel for have been easy driving distances and only had to get a hotel for one (the others have been in my hometown and we stayed with my parents). I'd say maybe $150 as a regular guest. As a member of the wedding party? I've spent $300, maybe $350? 
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  • I live in a high cost of living area, so that sounds reasonable, especially if you have to travel.  Depending on the person, I give between $200 and $400 as a gift.  When I was in my friend's BP, I probably spent over $600 between dress, hair, make up, shower gift, bachelorette party, and wedding gift.  My brother's wedding was even higher, not factoring in the hotel for the weekend.

    For our wedding, we had a lot of OOT guests and I tried to keep costs as low as possible for them.  The hotel ended up being about $130 a night and I fought and fought for a lower price, but the hotel wouldn't go any cheaper.  I didn't want people spending a ton of money just to stay at our wedding.
  • I think it's possible to spend that much, but I'm pretty budget savvy, so we never have spent that much as a guest.  We usually buy a $100 gift and if we stay at a hotel, it's around $150 per night.  For out of town weddings, we drive so gas is maybe another $50.  So, at most, we spend $300.

    As a wedding party member, I definitely see spending that much, if not more. I'm in a wedding in October (the first I've ever been in) and I'm spending $150 for the dress, my shoes were $70, and the bachelorette party is going to be ~$300 for a weekend getaway.  The bride is paying for hair and makeup, but if she wasn't, I'd just do my own.  I'm also helping throw the couple a wedding shower and I've budgeted around $250 for that.  So, my total is a little less than $800.
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  • Went to a wedding this weekend.

    Spent:
    $50 dress
    $130 hotel
    $50 gas
    $60 babysitting
    $200 gift
    $50 meals out that were not provided
    $75 dog boarding

    Sounds pretty accurate to me. I feel we did pretty good with costs here too, saving money by spending one night with a friend of DH, and my dress wasn't too expensive, plus I wore it last weekend for Caleb's baptism. We actually have a second wedding this weekend. It will be more expensive than the last one because we have to pay for an extra hotel room for my mother so she can watch Caleb while we are fine, plus DH is in this one and needs to pay for the tux. And this hotel has no fridge access for breast milk. I need to leave milk behind for the baby to eat while I'm gone...
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