Recognizing Loss (Obviously LR)

brij2006 · May 2014

Does anyone do anything to recognize their loss(es) on an annual basis? If so, what do you do? Or do you know of someone who does something?

It's coming closer to what would have been our EDD, and I want to do something that we could continue annually. @nightmare_of_beauty's post got me thinking about doing something, and I wanted to see if anyone else does anything.

nightmare_of_beauty · May 2014

Like I said, we're setting off paper lanterns on Saturday. I got different colored ones.

I also have the u/s in a frame by our wedding pictures, two angels for the garden, and a Christmas ornament.

ETA: I almost forgot! There's a local toy drive every Christmas and we plan to donate toys every year. It was DH idea, he liked getting to pick out the toys last year.

carcrashheart · May 2014

no, it's not something i have come to remember exact dates of over the years. the first EDD i ate chinese in bed and sulked. i have precious moments figurines for 2 of the 3 babies. i haven't felt the need to remember every year though.

tdmd09 · May 2014

I don't really do anything on purpose annually. On the actual EDDs I had to work, which sucked major ass, but then I tried to do something nice for myself (go shopping, get my nails done, etc.) to cheer up. I do have Christmas ornaments for each of my angels, and people gave me loss jewelry for each of them that I made into a bracelet that I have in my jewelry box. I have two friends who gave birth on my first EDD so unfortunately I am reminded of that every year. And the other EDD is my BIL's birthday so I never forget that one either. I usually take some time to think about them.

ILoveRedVino · May 2014

Not my early miscarriage. This is probably flameful, but I don't even remember dates. I think it was end of June. No idea what the due date was.

I do celebrate (that sounds like an awfully positive word... We don't like have a party) Baby's birthday even though he wasn't born alive. It was a day that forever changed me.

brij2006 · May 2014

@iloveredvino That isn't flameful at all. I don't know/remember the EDD's of my CP's, and we do not do anything for those.

We did not go through anywhere near what you did, but I feel that our lives were forever changed by our loss. It put us into attack mode on getting rid of our debt and bettering our marriage for the sake of ourselves and our future family. It also made us really rethink TTC and the way we want to approach it.

H bought me a "forget me not" Willow Tree Angel, and wrote a sweet note to never forget our first baby. Maybe having that will suffice, although I would like to do something this year on the EDD to help me close the door on our loss and move forward from it. I might steal nightmare's idea and that will give me some sort of closure.

pb&fluff · May 2014

I recognize the date that we lost Addison, but not her EDD after the first year. For her, we have a framed u/s pic up and an ornament. It's gotten easier each year, but I will always consider September 27th her "birthday."

We don't do anything on the anniversary of our m/c or on that baby's EDD.

Recognizing Loss (Obviously LR)

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