help: money matters

Penguin129 · July 2014

I've been trying to figure out how to pay for the work I need done on my teeth. I am going to take care of what I can now and just wait for the rest for later. We were denied the Care Credit Card that is the financing program the dentist uses and some regular credit cards. I am not sure why we are being declined. It may be our income/debt ratio is too high with me staying at home. I am taking out retirement money early and we are cashing dh's savings bonds to help us pay. Still, it is only enough for half the cost of the work they say I need done.

Anyway, our bank said we would be able to get a secured credit card. We would have to put $x in a cd savings account for 2 years and the bank would extend us the equal amount in a credit line. It is meant to help build your credit. I am worried that if a real emergency comes up where we need the money we wouldn't be able to use it. Has anyone heard of this kind of card? Do you think it is worth looking into more and getting? Any ideas are welcome. I'm at a loss.

Also... what is you opinion on paying collections once a bill is sent there? I have some that are in collections, but do not show on my most recent credit report.

I feel like I may have given too much information about money matters here, but I really am wondering what others think and would do. Thank you for your help.

shellyamf · July 2014

I do not agree with not paying collections unless you truly don't owe the money. If you do owe then you should pay whatever you can. As far as the credit card, I haven't heard of a secured credit card so I don't know anything more than what you provided. It sounds like it can be a good way to get the financing you need right now. I understand the concern about having those funds tied up for 2 years. Would either of your parents help you out if you did have an emergency in the future? I hate having to ask my parents for money but I know if I really really had to, I could. So if that is an option I would say go for the card. You have the benefit of building your credit. That could be one reason for being declined, not having much of a credit history. Not having a credit history can be worse than having bad credit when you are trying to get a loan. Hugs!!! I hate money issues. I need to go to the dentists and I'm sure I will need some work. I'm in denial.

one2andnow3 · July 2014

I only have a comment on bills and collections...

I had a few go to collections 7 years ago. Right after I had Avery with no money or support. I did and really could not pay for years. When I met D he said you are halfway through the 7 so don't pay. I do not recommend this because it affects your credit and it is so hard to rebuild.

I always ask myself is it a want or a need? Ask your dentist what is the most important thing that you have done if you could only get one. They can be scam artist at times.

Penguin129 · July 2014

I have that feeling about some of the things the dentist said I need done. I have 5 big cavaties that for sure need to get done. The crowns they want to replace I think are fine. They also want to put in 2 new crowns, but I think I may ask them if they can do the fillings instead. At least now I am flossing and using flouride. This was the wake up call I needed.

jjbmstinco · July 2014

This is just my opinion, so take it with a grain of salt.

I would never cash in SB or touch retirement. This are long term, and this is a short term need.

I personally would look for things to sell, pick up a weekend job, or a small side job.I know your H is against it, but sometimes we have to do what you have to do. Look for cutting corners elsewhere. I think it would be helpful if you posted a budget so we can see where you can cut somewhere else. Can you take care of another child while you are caring for Abby?

Jean9ds · July 2014

I agree with Jen ^^ I tell myself once money is away in a SB or retirement, it "stops existing." I know money is tough, but I'm always surprised by how many areas money can cut. Does your husband work set hours a week and you could maybe find a job with opposite hours?

And I don't think you gave too much information about money. We're all friends and we'll all honestly try to help each other. So never hesitate to ask for opinions

Am12712 · July 2014

I agree with Jen as well.

You should head on over to myfico.com they have amazing forums there and can be a huge help when it comes to dealing with collections and rebuilding your credit. They offer great, non judgemental advice.

shellyamf · July 2014

I will say I had stuff go to collections years ago. I did get them paid off. Just wanted to let you know it's a place a lot of us have been. And I agree on dentists being scam artists. Not all but a lot of them. Watching another kid even part time could be a good way to make money. I posted on a local mom board about being available to babysit to help us earn extra cash.

Am12712 · July 2014

I just did a pay for a delete for a collection I had. I offered to pay them in full in turn they had to delete it from my credit record and they did.

jjbmstinco · July 2014

Is there any way to hold off on the dentist work until you have the money?

Penguin129 · July 2014

Thanks everyone for your honest responses.

Getting a job is an idea, but it is very difficult with the hours dh works. As I write this I am thinking of Jean's opposite hours suggestion. The thing is dh doesn't get home until 7 pm from work. I would have to have my mil watch Abby so I could work something like 5-10. I know dh won't want to put his mom in that position. She is always exhausted from the middle schoolers she teaches all day. It is just so hard with dh's hours. Plus this fall he has to take a class on campus to get his professional. I could look into working in a daycare and maybe get a discount on Abby's care. I could look into online tutoring or watching another kid at our house. I guess I am just nervous about having someone else's child in my home, it was different when I worked in daycare.

I know we should save the money in the bonds and retirement. The truth is it really isn't that much money and I am ok using it for my health aka teeth. It is not like I am buying a big tv with it or something.

Right now I am only planning on getting the cavities filled and waiting on the crowns.

jjbmstinco · July 2014

Every marriage is different and to each their own, but here is where I see the problem. A marriage is a partnership. That means give and take. Now it seems to me that while you love your daughter and being a SAHM, you would like to work as well. He doesn't want you to work. I don't see him compromising on anything. I know that I am not in your home and not listening to your conversations, so I am aware that I might be off here. If I am please don't hesitate to say that. I just say this because I am a strong believer in independence.

It sounds like you made your decision about where you are going to find the money. I hope your recovery time isn't too long. Dental work is a pain.

jjbmstinco · July 2014

I hestiated to post this. I am not out to point out flaws in people/relationships. My H and I have our issues as well. I am just trying to be the devils advocate so when you make your final decision, you can be confident that you looked at all sides.

Penguin129 · July 2014

Devil's advocate is ok. I asked for thoughts and ideas and you were honest.

I talked to him about the secured credit card and we agreed it was a good idea to help us build credit and collect interest on the money in the cd the bank requires as collateral. Then we could use that money once the card is paid off to help with a down payment on a house. We also own some land thanks to his parents gifting us two lots they owned a couple weeks ago. We could use that when buying a house too.

We talked about the ideas of me working in daycare with Abby at the same place. While he doesn't want Abby away from me at this age and is worried about her being exposed to germs he said we could look into it. There is a daycare in town he said is really good that we can check out next week. We aren't sure they are even hiring, but we can still tour it.

The night shift job just doesn't work. We don't want to rely on his mom watching Abby. Also the babysitting other kids at home feels too risky for both of us.

He likes the idea of me teaching online and said I should look into that. I need to get my laptop fixed for that to work though.

We have ideas and lists and had a good talk. I am independent. I make my own choices, he doesn't make them for me. My #1 choice is to keep staying at home with only Abby as my main concern. I think that is why I am not pushing the issue of me working. I know we can make it on one income, we did it last year. Was it tight? Yes. But it worked. I think most people wouldn't do what we are doing, but we aren't most people. Every family and marriage is different. At least I know if we can make it work on one income, even if it is by the skin of our teeth, we will be fine on 2 incomes when I go back to teaching.

I tend to overshare. I am grateful for your honest responses.

ImperiumWife · July 2014

I just want to point out that *this* is why our board is awesome. We can all respect the truth and say things nicely.

That being said, I think you have most of it worked out. I haven't heard about a secure credit card, but as long as you read the fine print - most cases, with a CD, there are rules about termination, and you can take the money out if you really need, but you lose all the interest. I'd be interested in hearing more about that to give you an honest opinion about it, but it sounds like a good deal, especially with them paying interest on top of it.

But I would also ask the dentist about what really, truly needs to be done. The crowns can wait. I know my parents have put off getting crowns, even though the dentist suggested them, and didn't have problems.

Also, you may want to look into credit counseling. I don't know if you already do or not, but I've heard that it can be really helpful, and help you get your bills down to one. It also makes you look better to creditors because you've worked your way to paying something off each month, and you've paid off the older things. I do agree with whoever said about it sometimes being about not having enough credit experience. I've only had one medical bill go to collection through error, and it kept me from getting a credit card because it was like the only thing on my credit history. They trust you more the further you go along.

I am glad that you were able to have a talk with him though and get make some compromises. I believe it will all work out for you!

Penguin129 · July 2014

ImperiumWife

I talked to the bank this morning. We use USAA and dh's parents say they are the best bank around. The rep on the phone told me our money in the CD would earn interest monthly. If at the end of the 2 year term there is still a balance on the card the bank will pay the card off with some of the money from the CD and give us the rest.

As far as the dentist...

I have cavities that need to be filled. They say I need 2 old crowns replaced, but they are not giving me any problems at all and at $900+ each to get them replaced they are going to wait a long time. They also say I need 2 new crowns. The dentist I went to that was out of network said I could just get fillings in those teeth. I am going to ask the dentist I am going to if they could just do the fillings instead of the crowns. The crowns are the best option, but so expensive. At this point I just have to do what works.

ImperiumWife · July 2014

I think the card sounds like a great deal then! Just make sure that you can pay it all off by the time it comes due so you get all back!

I wish you a lot of luck!

help: money matters

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