Relationships
Tigersave101
member
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Motivation
Hello everyone!
So I love my DH more than I could possibly say, but I have been having the worst time in trying to motivate him to do ANYTHING. We are both active duty military right now and I love it, but he hates it with a passion. I'm also enrolled in school right now (going for a Masters), but I feel like he doesn't want to try to catch up to where I am (he's got his HS Diploma) so he's giving up on doing anything more. We both know we don't want him to stay in the military we're closing in on his last year and change, but we really like our income and lifestyle. I'm afraid that he doesn't want to go to school, and he really has no career aspirations at this point either.
What on earth can I do?
Oh a little background about his personality: He loves drawing (doesn't want to go to art school). He likes to create structural maps (no real drive for architecture schooling). He is very passionate about video games and board games (has invested in the past, but we don't have money to help or get real return on an investment).
Based on these little tid bits what do you think?
So I love my DH more than I could possibly say, but I have been having the worst time in trying to motivate him to do ANYTHING. We are both active duty military right now and I love it, but he hates it with a passion. I'm also enrolled in school right now (going for a Masters), but I feel like he doesn't want to try to catch up to where I am (he's got his HS Diploma) so he's giving up on doing anything more. We both know we don't want him to stay in the military we're closing in on his last year and change, but we really like our income and lifestyle. I'm afraid that he doesn't want to go to school, and he really has no career aspirations at this point either.
What on earth can I do?
Oh a little background about his personality: He loves drawing (doesn't want to go to art school). He likes to create structural maps (no real drive for architecture schooling). He is very passionate about video games and board games (has invested in the past, but we don't have money to help or get real return on an investment).
Based on these little tid bits what do you think?
Re: Motivation
While I realize transitioning and not quite knowing what you want to do with your life is challenging, he needs to grow up and get a game plan. Most people don't have the luxury of working in a job they love and are passionate about. Granted, he shouldn't choose a field he hates...but he needs to find something to do with his life that is at least tolerable.
I have a BS in Business. Did I get that degree because I am just oh so fascinated with companies and how they work? No. I got that degree because it is practical and had classes that were more interesting to me than other "practical" degrees, ie engineering, nursing, etc.
I'm guessing the military has lots of great resources for their members who will be transitioning back into civilian life, including therapy and career counseling. But, right now, it sounds like he is shooting down any possibilities so he doesn't have to do anything or make any decisions. Unfortunately, trying to motivate someone who doesn't want to be motivated is pretty much impossible. The best I can say is to be understanding, but firm. Acknowledge that it is unfortunate there is no clear path for him at the moment, but he needs to find SOMETHING that will move your family forward into the future. Whether that is starting in a new career or going to school for a new career.
One other thing I will point out, if he really hates traditional education there are a myriad of trade schools out there. Perhaps he could go into drafting? Although a BS is better, there are good jobs in drafting that can be acquired even with a 2-year and seems to go along with his structural mapping interest.
They're everywhere on teh web --- he can take one of those tests and see where his strong interests are, career wise.
Art is a tough field to get into. There is also animation and graphic design but those also are 2 more tough fiends to get into.
What is he really good at, besides what you have named? I know there still are printers and signmakers available --- and I think mapmakers are still very much needed.