Buying A Home
Dear Community,

Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.

If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.

Thank you.

Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.

Lots of home or location?

 DH and I will begin the home-buying process this spring, however, we first need to agree on a location in which we're searching.  We live in a HCOL area.  If we buy a house 45min from the city (1 hour commute to my job), we can afford a bigger home with some land.  I would love that but don't think I'm willing to do an hour commute everyday given I have a baby that I want to get home to.  Alternatively, a home closer to our jobs would be more modest or probably a townhouse.  Not ideal but it is what it is.  Just curious what others' think or if you've had the same dilemma (and what did you decide?)  Thanks!

Anniversary                  

Re: Lots of home or location?

  • For me, my time and keeping my aggravation levels down is more important than a bigger/better house.  Though that is making the assumption that the smaller/closer house is still at least something I would be happy living in for at least the next 5 years or so.

    I had a similar choice to make when I bought my first home.  I could buy either a pretty awesome and luxurious house in a decent area, a similarly sized house to what I have now (for just my living space) in a "hot" and awesome area, or I could buy a duplex in a decent area.  Which would mean both a not as optimal living space for myself AND a not as optimal area.  But some kick**s monthly cash flow.

    I went with the duplex and its monthly cash flow...but even my portion of the house is something I am primarily happy with and plan to live in for at least the next 5+ years.  I may never leave, lol.

  • A longer commute is more aggrivation, more gas money, more wear & tear on your vehicle.
    A larger house is more space to heat, cool, (more cost) as well as more to furnish and clean.

    I would opt for a house closer to work that is adequate, but not necessarily your ideal.
    It is all about your priorities.

    We bought a house much less than what we can afford (used only one income) in order to fund other priorities.

    If you value your time as well as time with family - there is nothing wrong with going with a smaller house.  You do not have to keep up with anyone else's choices or preferences.  This is YOUR life - so live it as you will with NO explanations needed.  Just because you can buy a bigger, better house - does not mean that you should by a bigger better house.
  • Can you meet in the middle and do a modest home with a yard?  If I had children, I wouldn't want to raise them in a townhouse....I'd want a proper yard, even if wasn't huge.   But that's me.  And DH and I are not having kids.  :D
  • When we were hunting for a house, we lived on the very edge of our city, and loved the area.  We originally wanted a house with a lot of land (which would mean buying a house on the opposite edge of the city, with an even longer commute to get to work), but our price range really limited us.  We found a house directly in the center of the city (in an area that we weren't initially thrilled about) that had just enough land to make us happy. 

    We bought it, and we love it.  We've talked several times about how much we love being so close to everything (which is something that we initially didn't put a lot of value in).  The area still isn't ideal, but once you buy your home, you can either focus on things that you love about it, or focus on things that you hate about it. 

    Try to imagine how you will use the house. 

    If you:  detest the idea of exterior home maintenance or yard care, prefer quick commutes to work or other areas around the city, plan on keeping your family fairly small, and know that you will always work in the city - then a smaller home or townhouse within the city is a good idea.

    If you:  Plan on growing your family quite a bit, expect to frequently host many out-of-town guests, want to do a lot of gardening and love to landscape, don't mind long commutes, or could potentially move your job into your home or near your home - then the a larger home farther away is a good idea. 

    Alternatively, if you move out of the city, but stick with a modest home, could you afford to pay for it on only one income?  If there is any appeal to paying off your house quickly, or saving up to buy a second home to rent out the other, this could be an option.
  • Thank you all for these extremely useful responses.  I agree with the notion that time and sanity is priceless.  When DH and I sit down, I plan to raise many of these valid points and I think our best bet is living closer to our jobs, even if it isn't a "luxury" style home. The smaller, more modest homes in the area are well-built and many of the neighborhoods are nice for our expanding family.
    Anniversary                  
  • We're in a similar situation.  We live in a HCOL area with horrible traffic, so we've always prioritized living walking distance to public transit.  

    At first we wanted to stay in the area we currently live in but housing was so expensive we could only afford a 1000 sq ft townhome.  Then we switched to wanting a single family home with a yard in another state (still the same metro area), but we'd have to drive to take public transit.

    Recently, we found a new home community with a nice park that's walking distance to public transit and has 2000 sq ft townhomes.  We decided we're going to go for this because we still get a decent sized house even though it's a townhome, and we're going to have a better commute that will allow us to still spend time with family and friends.

    As far as raising a family in a townhome, we're not concerned about that.  My DH was raised in a townhome, and he loved it.  Sure he didn't really have a yard to play in, but he hung out with all the other kids around his age in the neighborhood at the parks and playgrounds in the community.
  • Commutes can be hell, so I'd give serious thought to that choice. Are you confident in your job that you will stay there for at least 2-5 years? If so that might make the commute worth it. If not, are there other jobs in that area, is this an area where you will most likely always be working?

    How about weather, do you have snow/ice storms that will make 1 hour turn into 3 hours on a bad day? The wear and tear plus gas does add up too. 

    Is your H on the same page about your commute. Would this mean you leaving earlier and getting home later than you do now? Does that effect day care pick up and drop off? Would day care have to change if you moved closer in or stayed further out?

    Since you have a little one, how about the school systems, are they good schools in the area where you'd have a shorter commute? Again if you plan to stay in this house you have to consider where he or she will go when they get older. 

    I personally wouldn't want a town house because they cost the same amount as some decent free-standing houses in my area (I'm in the same boat I live further out from the jobs and have more house, although DH has a job where we have to live 15 miles from his job so I have no choice.) Are there town houses or duplexes that have 3 levels? Perhaps a nice finished basement would be nice once your child gets older. Do you and your H want a yard of your own?

    I don't have children, I don't want children, but I've given though to a long commute with a child at home in the past. Do you have an emergency back up if god-forbid there was an emergency? If you're 1 hour away who will pick the child up from school or day care etc? What if you get stuck late at work and you're 1 hour away, how does that effect your day to day? All questions you and your H should consider when making your decision. Good luck!
  • Given your situation, I would prefer to buy a house close to my work. Not only that I can save time, I can also save resources like I won’t have to get in the car or hop on a bus to spend hours travelling, so that you will be able to avoid the hassle of queues of traffic during rush hour and delays when your bus breaks down.

    You don’t have to worry quite as much about being late, because if your workplace is only ten minutes away by foot you could always run there! 

    If you work close to home you can always nip back at lunch time to grab something to eat; or if you’ve forgotten something. You can’t always predict what is going to happen during the day and so if there is a sudden emergency it is handy to be able to reach home within a couple of minutes.
Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards