Joint Accounts?

MissKittyDanger · January 2015

I haven't seen a discussion about this, but if there is please let me know!

My fiance and I are in the middle of having a discussion on whether to have a joint account or not. (only current account with both names is for rent) Right now we're with 2 different banks. I've heard bonus on either side of this.

Side 1: my parents had separate accounts but had one account for mortgage. After my dad stopped working due to health reasons, he started just sending my mum money and most came out of her account.

Side 2: fiance's mum and step-dad have multiple accounts. One joint that all income goes into and bills get paid through, then side accounts for personal spending.

While I am kind of siding with just 1 account and using cash (trying to track spending and curb it currently) We are just not sure.

Currently we pay our own bills, he sends rent money to come out of joint account from my bank and when we have to send money for wedding things (cheques, etc) it will be coming from my account.

What does everyone else do? And why?

kasi55 · January 2015

We have all joint accounts because we view all money as "ours". We don't view it in terms of his/hers. We have a joint checking account that both of our paychecks get deposited into and our bills our paid out of. We also have several joint savings accounts for various purposes. We do get a small amount of money each month to spend as we please, no questions asked.

We have similar values when it comes to money, and we didn't have a lot of bills before we got married. I know that some people have success with separate finances also, but this works for us.

I would have a conversation about your finances and see where you both stand. I would wait until after you are married to truly join finances if that is what you choose to do.

Congrats on your upcoming wedding!

hoffse · January 2015

We have joint everything for a few reasons:

1) At the end of the day, most of your money goes to sustaining your family as a unit. It doesn't matter who earned it or what account it comes out of. It's easier and faster for both of our paychecks to be sent to the same account (direct deposit) so that we can pay bills with that money immediately instead of having to move money around and wait for it to clear.

2) If one of us died, the other would not be locked out of the accounts, because their name is on everything. Even if you are the beneficiary on an account, you usually have to present a death certificate before they will unlock it for you. Having money frozen is really the last thing either of us would want to deal with in that situation.

3) Same as #2 but it's almost worse if one of us became incapacitated. There is no death certificate to present in that case, and you might have to go through procedures to be declared incompetent, etc.

We keep two joint checking accounts, a joint savings account, and then we have several joint brokerage accounts. Retirement accounts cannot be joint by law, but we each have signed documents to give the other trading privileges on our individual retirement accounts. That way if something happened, either one of us could immediately start liquidating everything if necessary.

A lot of people do 95% of it joint but then keep an individual checking account for fun money or blow money so that you can spend it on yourself judgment-free. We have talked about doing something similar for gifts for each other.... since combining, we haven't been able to surprise each other around birthdays or holidays because we both see everything that the other buys. All of our credit cards are joint too. If we did this, we would only keep a minimal amount of money in individual accounts at any given time.

The drawback is that if we ever got divorced, it would be a race to the accounts (I would win). It can also be sort of hard to transition to this system because you start to see that your spouse might have different financial priorities than you. And s/he has every right to access that money when their name is on the account.

Still, with good communication I think joint is ultimately easier. It also keeps us brutally honest with one another, and we have no financial secrets. I check the accounts every day, he checks them a few times a week. We have found that when we can't hide our bad habits (mine is eating out for lunch, his is getting drinks after work), we actually stick to our financial goals better and save more.

hoffse · January 2015

Sidenote: Do wait until you are married before combining anything. You just never know.

When H and I got married he was still in law school. I was working. We got married on April 6 - a Saturday. On Monday April 8 I transferred money to him to fund his previous-year's Roth account before the deadline (April 15). He was kind of put-out that I waited until the wedding had happened to transfer that money for his retirement, but I stuck to my guns on it and he got over it.

jtmh2012 · January 2015

kasi55 said:

We have all joint accounts because we view all money as "ours". We don't view it in terms of his/hers. We have a joint checking account that both of our paychecks get deposited into and our bills our paid out of. We also have several joint savings accounts for various purposes. We do get a small amount of money each month to spend as we please, no questions asked.

This is what we do as well and for the same reasons. It is our income and our expenses. All income goes into our common checking account and all bills are paid from there. We don't have a specific "fun money" budget. We've never needed one. Neither of us are big spenders.

brij2006 · January 2015

#1 Do not join accounts until there is a marriage certificate signed and you have said "I do."

We have joint accounts. Our household is ran together and we make decisions as a family unit. The budget is put together and discussed as a family. We had them separate until we got married (lived together for 3 years prior), before the wedding it was a bit complicated since we split the bills down the middle with the exception of our separate car and student loan payments.

But our money is OUR money. We actually haven't even done any his and hers "spending" money the last few months because we just budget in what we want to spend on, and the fun money isn't even needed because we discuss what we want to spend beforehand and plan it in the budget.

jessica490 · January 2015

After we got married we opened 1 joint account in which we:

1. Pay all the bills from

2. transfer $ to our different savings accounts with capitalone360

3. Each take a set amount of "fun" money to use until the paycheck

4. Leave about $200-$250 in the account for gas/other small expenses that come up (ordering take-out, dog grooming etc)

simplyelise · January 2015

We do all our money in a joint account. For me, it would be really hard to not feel like it would be keeping score. I was so so tired of trading turns to buy food for dinner during the dating/engagement period, it was such a relief to just have one pot.

We each get $60 cash a month as blow money. Most of that for both of us goes towards buying lunches or a snack at the gas station. I used $15 this month to renew my blog domain.

Right now, my husband has been in between jobs since the beginning of the month. The student loans are only in his name, so if we were keeping finances separate, he'd be really in a bad place right now and would have to take the first low-paying job that comes up. But since we're together with our finances, he can afford to do some temping while we wait to hear back on a couple jobs that would be really good career moves. Similarly, if I am able to work part time when we have kiddos, I won't feel like I'm getting an allowance from my sugar daddy.

I'm very pro-joint finances. Otherwise it's too easy to side-eye your partner's purchases.

als1982 · January 2015

H and I have a joint account into which both our salaries are deposited and we pay all bills. Then we both have accounts where we deposit our 'fun money' once a month. It's a great system that works for us.

We did open our joint account when we were engaged, using it exclusively for wedding expenses (neither of us had our paychecks direct deposited into it, nor did we use it for bills that weren't wedding or honeymoon related, until after the wedding). I will say that after the wedding it was nice that there was one less thing to do by not having to open a new account, and as an added bonus we could immediately deposit any wedding checks made out in either of our names the Monday after our wedding.

Xstatic3333 · January 2015

We have separate checking accounts just because it makes budgeting easier for us (our take homes are very similar). We still consider all money our money, and if there was any doubt about that we'd scrap the separate accounts in a heartbeat. All savings are joint. We didn't combine anything until after the wedding.

vlagrl29 · January 2015

we waited to join our accounts until we were married. we have all accounts (checking/savings) joint but do have separate business and retirement accounts. It's just easier for me because I am the only one that balances the check book and pays the bills on time - he makes most of the money since I'm a SAHM and part time self employed. We did have separate accounts for "fun money" - but as of the last few years I never used mine so I closed the account because we don't really do that kind of stuff anymore and are lucky to spend $20 a month in entertainment.

If you do go the separate account make sure you list each other as POD's so if something happened the money wouldn't go to probate.

KatieCutie05 · January 2015

We went Joint right after we were married and it was the best thing we ever did. Not only is it a bajillion times easier to manage but it forced us to communicate and get on the same page. When its in one joint account you just plain don't worry about who is making the money - its just "our" money. We have a monthly budget and each person gets a small amount of spending money that is still "mine" and "his" so we don't have to ask permission for every little thing. Plus if you ask me i really shouldn't have to worry about owing my own husband money.

smbenevides1989 · January 2015

We also have joint everything. I am one of the few people who have a joint checking account prior to marriage. DH was going from job to job and he wasn't doing a great job financially, which was a problem trying to save up for wedding expenses. He also lost his job at the time, so having a joint account was easier for us. He wasn't keen on it until he saw how much he was saving vs spending. Now everything we earn/save is our money. I budget and we figure out what needs to be spent on what during the month. It definitely saves us so much hassle on everything.

goldiemu · January 2015

K and I were never married but together for 13 years. We had a joint account to pay bills and then individual accounts for investments and leisure. At one point during our time together we invested in his retirement options because he had two since he worked for the state. When we split, we were able to look up when we started investing on the different platforms and split it down the middle. However, he did not want to take his money out of the account so he paid me off from his savings account.

California has no common law status so while I had a right to half the house since it was joint purchased property, I had no right to his retirement even though I helped him invest in it. Luckily, K is nice so we split amicably. However, I highly recommend if you are in a partnership whether you are married or not that you track everything just in case you need it for IRS audit reasons or G_D forbid, you go your separate ways.

Erikan73 · January 2015

We have seperate & joint. We each get a set amount from each pay for an allowance. Our allowance goes into our individual accounts. That is money that we don't have to answer to the other on how it is spent. I tend to use mine for clothes, my husband uses his for eating out lunch or golfing. The rest of the money goes into a joint account which is what all our bills (mortgage, util, food, gas for cars, insur, etc) are paid from. And I have all our bills set up for automatic withdrawal so this way neither of us have to remember to mail/issue the payments. The other thing that helps us with our monthly budget is that our gas & electric companies allowed us to be set up on a budget plan so the same amount gets taken out every month and they adjust with notice when needed based on our use.

MissKittyDanger · January 2015

@hoffese

In regards to #2 if one of you passed away, I would have a chat with your bank before jumping the gun on that. My dad passed away and one bank gave my mum a hell of a time even though both names were on it. The funeral home even called the bank after hearing of her issues to have it unfrozen. (they continued to cause havok after death certificate was presented also but that's a diff story)

Just a heads up. This was just one bank, another bank was perfectly fine without issues.

vlagrl29 · January 2015

mrsspence87 said:

@hoffese
In regards to #2 if one of you passed away, I would have a chat with your bank before jumping the gun on that. My dad passed away and one bank gave my mum a hell of a time even though both names were on it. The funeral home even called the bank after hearing of her issues to have it unfrozen. (they continued to cause havok after death certificate was presented also but that's a diff story)

Just a heads up. This was just one bank, another bank was perfectly fine without issues.

That's crazy! I had a hell of a time getting money on an account but it was because it was not joint rather POD - so that's why I will always be joint with DH.

lifeonthehill · January 2015

We have EVERYTHING combined.

We have one checking account that we use to pay bills and for personal spending. We have gotten to a point where we are both responsible enough to have a card on hand and not over spend. Phew.

Three savings accounts. One for emergency money, and the other two change based on need. Right now they are new car fund and my fall semester tuition fund.

JoanE2012 · January 2015

We have both joint and separate accounts. Our paychecks go into our respective separate accounts. DH pretty much all of the bills. He takes what he needs for "fun" money (though, he's not much of a spender to begin with). Once he has a few thousand leftover slushing around in there, he'll move it over to the joint savings.

Most of my income is directed to our joint savings. Part is directed to our vacation fund and the rest is funneled into our "house" savings (for big projects like our deck this summer!) or general long term savings.

It might not be ideal for everyone, but it works for us.

dragonstarjk · January 2015

I know I'm in the minority here, but we have all separate accounts and it has worked marvelously for us. We decided a long time ago who is responsible for paying which bills. H pays the mortgage, his student loans (he had these way before we met and insists that he does not want me to have to pay them), his truck payment, Internet service, and all of our dogs' expenses. I pay utilities, my car payment, most household items such as rugs, curtains, kitchenware, etc. and I am responsible for funding 'our' savings accounts. We consider them our accounts even though they are only in my name.

We are beneficiaries on each other's accounts. We both pay for our own vehicle insurance, make our own retirement contributions, pay our own gas, fun money, etc. We take turns paying for groceries. H also pays for most of our date nights while I pay for most of our travel expenses.

In my state, it takes approximately two weeks to get a death certificate, which is all one of us would need to access each other's accounts (I work at the bank where we have all of our accounts). We are both comfortable with this, although we have talked about adding each other to our accounts when we are closer to retirement. We would still maintain separate accounts though.

We have never, ever had a problem with believing that it is 'my' money and 'his' money just because it is in separate accounts. We just immediately work out who pays what and it is completely a non-issue. The advantage has been that since we don't necessarily have the same money habits (I like to pay bills on payday, as soon as I have the funds; H likes to wait and pay them the day they are due) we also never fight about money. I can't recall a single time that money has EVER been an issue in our relationship. Because of this, we never combined accounts after we got married (we were together 7 years before getting married). Because why change what isn't broken?

That being said, both of our names are on the mortgage, the vehicle loans, and a couple of credit cards. This is because again, just because H pays the mortgage, it's not 'his' money and 'his' house. It's ours. And we are both on the same page about it so life is good!

hoffse · January 2015

mrsspence87 said:

@hoffese
In regards to #2 if one of you passed away, I would have a chat with your bank before jumping the gun on that. My dad passed away and one bank gave my mum a hell of a time even though both names were on it. The funeral home even called the bank after hearing of her issues to have it unfrozen. (they continued to cause havok after death certificate was presented also but that's a diff story)

Just a heads up. This was just one bank, another bank was perfectly fine without issues.

That's awful. It would also probably be illegal (in the US) if they blocked her access to that account. If your name is on an account you are an owner of that account and have a legal right to every penny in it. I'm sorry that happened to your mom.

Sisugal · January 2015

Do not combine accounts before you are married.
We have all joint accounts and also have a separate personal accounts.
All money goes into joint account - and then we each get an "allowance" for personal use to spend or save as desired - no accountability. for that.
I would recommend a good book to help you make financial decisions that will work for you as a couple - each couple is different.
David Bach's book Smart Couples Finish Rich - will walk you thru a number of questionares to help you identify your own values and priorities - which you then share with each other and discuss. It will help you understand your partner's relationship with money and establish a financial plan that will work for BOTH of you.

You want to have these discussions prior to marriage. Until then you operate like "roommates" - equally share household expenses and pay your own personal financial responsibilities.

dancinxqueen324 · January 2015

Edited for terrible typos!

We have been married for a year and a half, but living together for almost 10 years. We have one joint account for rent/utilities/etc. and have our own accounts for personal bills. I pay my own student loans and he pays his own credit card bills, and that works for us. Although we have our own money and keep it separate, we also share our personal money without keeping score. We both pick up food or groceries for the other and we each use each other's things. I buy all the toilet paper, soap, quarters for laundry and things like that and he pays for Amazon prime and Netflix and things like that. Some of my friends think it's weird that we like to keep separate accounts and say "you're married, your money should all go towards both of you", but this works for us and we prefer it that way. I don't want to pay for his technology toys and he shouldn't have to pay for my ipsy and Fabletics accounts! We also discuss before buying big purchases, even if they're from our personal accounts. Everyone is different, I say do what works for you.

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