Family Matters
enissen77
member
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Need Advice - MIL issues
My fiance & I have been together for 8.5 yrs and I have known since long before I met him that I didn't want to have children. I've discussed it with him many times over the years and he is totally on board & together we are set in our decision to not reproduce. My MIL has made comments to me over and over throughout the years & it has gotten to a point where I feel disrespected & that it is rude to keep making comments and saying things like "you'll change your mind." No, I won't. I finally addressed the issue and emailed her (they are not a very confrontational family, way different than mine) and asked her to please stop & that I am fully prepared to answer the normal questions from people (which I have already done) but that I would hope to have her support. Her reply to me was basically that I should have empathy for her & her "loss of dreams" (yes she used those words). I am infuriated to say the least. My fiance has 2 siblings which are not married, there is every chance that they may have children. And there is no guarantee when you have kids that they are going to want to reproduce. I feel like she expects me to apologize for a decision I made years ago that has absolutely nothing to do with her. And I won't do it. Can anyone offer me some advice on how to handle this? I'm very torn.
Re: Need Advice - MIL issues
As far as you and what to do if/when she says something again - next time she brings up kids, look at her and firmly say "this topic isn't open for discussion." then turn away, walk away, etc. And depending on the situation, perhaps say "If you bring it up again, we 're leaving". And then you know what? You get up and leave if she does bring it up.
Stop "discussing" this with her. She knows where you stand. Don't entertain anything from her on this. Over and over and over state "This topic isn't open for discussion" and MEAN IT.
I wouldn't reply to the email, I wouldn't acknowledge it when you see her. She's SOOOOO out of bounds but trying to talk to her about it will get you no where. She feels she's owed grandkids. You aren't going to be able to rationalize her out of that.
And i feel your pain on this subject, except the brunt of it comes from my mother. My mother in law semi supports our decision.
What's the plan for dinner on blah blah blah redirect so that she can save face in a response by just answering your direct questions.
Chronically hilarious - you'll split your stitches!
I wrote a book! Bucket list CHECK!
http://notesfortheirtherapist.blogspot.co.uk