Waiting...

jnhroller · June 2015

My youngest is about to turn 15 and reading some threads I noticed people talking about a "Gender Reveal." That was like a foreign term to me, and I realized that today most expecting parents must just find out "early."

So, just curious, does anyone wait until the baby is born to find out the gender?

Never was a question in our world.

We found out the gender when each of our three babies were born.

I would have been utterly disappointed to know ahead of time. Would have taken something special away from the moment.

Not saying it is wrong; it's not. To each his own, but I just don't see ruining such a special, natural moment with that knowledge beforehand.

Just curious.... Thanks.

LooneyLife · June 2015

This all sounds very judgey. And there's probably a lesson needed on gender vs sex. But I'll play along. We waited until birth to find out our baby's sex.

iwalktheline · June 2015

We found out with my daughter, and if we ever get pregnant again, I will find out with that one too. It didn't "ruin" anything. I was able to bond closely with her through my pregnancy, knowing that she was a she. I was able to call her by her name. Not to mention, I was able to prepare a little more thoroughly by knowing ahead.

this whole post comes off as extremely judgmental.

formerlyGDaisy09 · June 2015

Agreed @LoonyLife, this does sound very judgy.

We plan to find out, most our decorating and big baby purchases are going to be neutral, however I struggle with referring to the baby as "baby" or "it" and I know I'll find being able to use the proper pronouns and be able to say "him or her" or "he or she" helpful in connecting to the pregnancy better.

I think the reveal parties, photoshoots, etc are a fun way to share that surprise moment of finding out the sex with eachother and/or a small group of family and friends. I'm not super into AW events like that, however we have good friends with the same due-date who want to do one of the cakes, so we are going to do a little BBQ with them and some friends.

again, to each their own, we may decide to wait to find out next time around.

jnhroller · June 2015

Apologies. I do not mean to sound judgmental. Probably could have picked my words better. It is an honest curiosity about the general mindset of this era. I would suspect it is the general practice now to find out "early."

With my oldest (22) the whole concept of knowing ahead of time was relatively new, certainly not cutting edge, but still relatively new. Haven't really thought about it in years until reading a post about a "gender reveal."

"Whoa...gender reveal? What's that?"

Again, apologies for not wording the post better.

islandmonkey8 · June 2015

I think it is perfectly natural to find out anything I can find out about my child ahead of time if that is what I want to do. I do not believe this will take anything away from the moment I get to meet her. I used to always think I was not going to find out the sex (NOT GENDER), but after fighting to conceive and keep this little baby my husband and I decided we would find out. We needed something to help us connect more and we just wanted to know.

I know quite a few people who choose to find out, and quite a few who don't. It's an individual decision that should never be judged.

brij2006 · June 2015

First off, your post does sound very judgmental. It's everyone's' personal choice whether or not to find out. As far as it being a "mindset of this era," this era is finding out more because it's actually an option now. Technology has come a long way to make this a possibility.

We did not find out what we were having. Yes, it was amazing and magical giving birth and then finding out who was in there that whole time. Will I do that again? You bet ya. But on the other side of the spectrum, we had a few losses prior to getting pregnant with our now daughter. During the pregnancy I had a very hard time connecting with baby, and did not bond one bit. My H had a better bond with our child than I did. Had I known it was a girl in there, I believe that would have helped me better emotionally.

So please do not judge "this era" for finding out the sex of their baby. You have no idea what they have been through to get that baby or why they are making the decision to know or not to know.

Aimothy · June 2015

I feel like this is data being collected for some research. Your youngest is 15, but you are hanging out on GP? Cause you posted this same thing there.

Three posts and the only topic is about gender reveals?

Yeah. Seems legit.

Venti29 · June 2015

I'll wait next time.

jnhroller · June 2015

No, no research. Just curiosity. I posted on the other forum first and they told me to post the question here, so I did.

Sorry, new here and was just reading posts and the whole gender reveal thing made me recognize a shift in the way things had once been.

Again..I apologize. Wasn't trying to offend or judge.

And thanks for the responses.

JLyn821 · June 2015

I didn't want to find out but my husband really wanted to. We knew if we were having a boy, he'd be named after my H's grandfather. Since my H's grandfather was 84 at the time, we opted to find out so that if it was a boy, we could tell him that our son would be named after him.

I'm so glad we found out and I'll definitely continue to with any other children we're blessed with. It definitely helped us bond with our sin before he was even born.

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