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My Dad is Declining CPR on His health care directive - interesting reason WHY
My parents just retired and moved to the state in which DH and I live. They are redoing their health care directives/living wills for this state.
My dad asked me to be his alternate health care agent after my mom. I accepted. The other night, he left me a copy of the directive. And, I read it. On one page of it, his desires for CPR are explained.
There are three boxes. Only one box may be checked. They are (briefly summarized) 1. I want CPR for any and all reasons. 2. I do not want CPR performed on me if I am terminally ill, but do want it in all other instances. 3. I do not want CPR performed on me for any reason whatsoever.
My dad chose the 3rd option. So basically, if he has a heart attack on the kitchen floor of my home, I am NOT to do CPR on him. If he collapses in front of my mom, who is a retired RN, she is NOT to do CPR on him. My dad is 72 and physically fit with no major health issues.
I am not posting this to complain about my Dad's wishes, but I am posting to get your feedback on something.
When I asked him WHY he does not want CPR under any circumstance, he said that he heard an NPR broadcast about how the majority of MDs also elect not to have CPR in their directives. And what the public fails to realize is that there's a VERY low survival rate of CPR AND people who do survive the event and then CPR being performed on them are often in a state where they have lost function of their brain and/or their limbs.
I was a bit incredulous about this so I did my own looking around. And it seems to be true. Even in European cities and cities like Seattle, where MANY people know CPR the survival rate is only 40-50%, but if you go to cities where it's not as common you're looking at survival rates of under 15%. Then of course people who do survive have to recover from damaged ribs, injured lungs and potentially being brain damaged,
I have taken a few CPR classes in my life. But no one ever describes the aftermath of CPR on the body and brain. And if you go to the Red Cross or sites like it, they have high praises for CPR. But, MDs seem to say something different.
Do you have any feedback? Thoughts?
Re: My Dad is Declining CPR on His health care directive - interesting reason WHY
I'm not an expert by any means, but I guess my personal preference would be to have CPR. I mean, even if I'm not going to survive, I'd like to try. And, if I was to end up losing brain function, it could still be in the directive somewhere to not keep me alive. I'd take a few broken ribs though.
I have heard of people being saved by CPR though, and they end up fine afterwards, even if it is not common. I'd want to take the chance. I'd probably have a really hard time honoring his wish if it were me.
Bolded. Yes, for my mom and me. I was like, "So dad, if I watch you keel over, on MY kitchen floor with your grandkids around, I'm supposed to leave you?!?"
It can get complicated. I know most professionals recommend only having your spouse as your advocate if you are 100% sure that they would follow your requests. Also the documents can be updated at any time. Primary MD should have copy. In my area, the local hospital has an electronic copy.
Keep open communication about it with your dad.
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While all of that is true about CPR, I'll admit to not understanding why someone wouldn't want CPR administered to at least try to save their life. If they end up being brain dead from it, that type of condition is also something included in an advanced directive.
My personal story. My father had a fatal heart attack at the age of 49. He worked at a nuclear power plant where everyone is required to have First Aid training. He collapsed as soon as he got to work and one of his coworkers immediately began CPR along with the company's nurse who arrived within the first minute. And, although their efforts unfortunately did not save him, it has always given me comfort to know that everything that could have been done was done.
In fact, one of my regrets in life was not finding out the names of the people who tried to help him. I would have liked them to have thanked them and let them know how comforting it was to know that all efforts had been made to save his life, but it was just his time.
You all have great perspectives. Thank you.
Just to reiterate to a PP, my mom is my dad's primary agent. If she is unavailable or unable, to serve then I serve in her place. I do personally agree that the spouse needs to be the primary - it just makes sense.
All of these decisions are worth discussing with family members.
I do think my dad will have a DNR on file at their local hospital. It's hard for me and even for my mom, the retired RN. She and I both would fight for life and want our loved ones to do the same.
My husband said it best..."If one of our kids fell in a pool, would we leave them? No! We'd fight for their lives! And maybe they would die, but we would have fought. Or, maybe they would be damaged in some way, but we would have fought for them and we'd love and care for them even still."