Relationships
Smgadore
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I know he bought a ring but it's been 3 weeks!!
So, my live in bf has been asking me random questions about what type of ring and wedding I'd want over the last few months. I even caught him sizing my finger with a zip tie one morning and pretended I was still asleep. I know he ordered a ring and got it about 3 weeks ago cuz of the size and shape of the package but he stuck it in a backpack he takes back and forth to work everyday. I asked him about it cuz he has always told me in the past what he ordered and why without me asking but he blows me off in a cute or funny way so I drop it not wanting to ruin anything for him but I don't know how much longer I can wait. I could even get in the bag on any given night and look so that maybe it'll stop driving me nuts. That way at least I'll be 100% sure but at the same time I'll ruin whatever he's planning or have 100 ?'s as to what's taking him so long. We get along with each other's parents and kids. There's no unresolved issues between us but it would be his 3rd marriage and my 2nd. So, what could he be waiting on??
Re: I know he bought a ring but it's been 3 weeks!!
Has his schedule been super busy? It could be he is simply waiting for the right moment to make the moment special. I know it's hard but I'd just sit tight and just enjoy your time together.
Never ever surprise a woman with a ring. Not even if you know she will like it.
The only way 100% satisfaction guaranteed will be accomplished: if you choose the ring. YOu will be the one wearing it for many years --- it should be something you are thrilled about and love without reservation.
(he can still propose. He can purchase the ring and then propose to you later on, after he's got the ring in hand when he makes his purchase)
What he should have done:
Taken you shopping for the ring you want!
Sit down with each other, once marriage is immmient and discuss how much he can spend right now and what kind of a ring you want.
And you shop around for it, as per his budget, and you view all possible venues: loose diamond, Diamond district, maybe having a fantastic ring you like copied and set with the diamond he an afford...or maybe you want a gemstone.
Wherever it is and whatever it is you want: it is up to him to please YOU.:)
Whatever it is you want:
It is up to him to please you and the 2 of you should be a team about the ring choice. This is the basis for your marriage: being a team.
I say he should spend what he can afford right now in cash --- it will cost phenomenally more if he finances that ring via a credit card.
(This is why guys should save their money very early on, even if there is no girl in sight --- earmarking $20 per week starting at age 20 (given he's got a part time job) will get him a nice little piece of change in 5 years or so when the girl does come along)
A third marriage for him and a second for you?
Uh, wow --- get counseling now before you are married. A possible third marriage for him is a lot...and you'd better know the reason why his first 2 marriages ended. he should be honest with you about that.
It was a solitare with just one stone. It had a halo of very small diamonds set around the perimeter -- and the setting wasn't even an invisible one; it was something a bit different and you cold not tell those little diamond were there until you eamined it with a jeweler's loop.
It shone like the sun; the solitaire diamond itself was a bit over a carat in size.
The price of the ring was $2800.
What a fantastic buy for somebody; it was purchased after a few weeks.
It is something you should pick out together, inasmuch as that you and he are a team. She should know his budget and he should ensure that what she chooses will be exactly what she wants and what will make her happy.
He should be keeping you and your happiness.in mind. You are his priority.
Your opinion certainly isn't held by everyone. I wasn't involved in the design of my ring and his proposal was a complete surprise. I loved both and wouldn't have it any other way.
I showed DH some rings I liked back when we were just dating. We had discussed marriage but after that kind of stopped and he told me he needed to save. Well a few weeks later he surprised me with the perfect proposal and perfect ring. It was similar to one I'd shown him but he designed this one. Is it what I would have picked? No probably not but I'd much rather have this one! I also loved the surprise and seeing the ring for the first time. If couples want to pick it out together that's fine but I'm glad he picked a ring for me!
Every relationship out there is different and what works for some people doesn't work for others. Doesn't make anyone wrong. it's just different.
He should be telling you straightaway what his budget for a ring is. He should do this when it's imminent you and he are going to be married. (wht you just said falls under the heading of "satisfaction guaranteed)
And from there you make the purchase -- - shop around. There are many great bargains for that amount..and there are also clearance items and loose diamonds.
*sigh* he went right ahead and chose it minus my input --- he got me yellow gold and he knew I did not prefer any metal that was yellow.
I never liked the ring --- of course, I never told him --- the whole point is this:
Whatever makes you happy is what works for you:
Whether that is "he picks the ring and I leave it up to him" or "I do not want a ring" or "I prefer a gemstone" or "I have always loved the idea of a solitaire with no side stones and no semimount" or "I want a black diamond."...whatever it is YOU want he is to ensure you are happy with the final result.
Whether that is "he picks the ring and I leave it up to him" or "I do not want a ring" or "I prefer a gemstone" or "I have always loved the idea of a solitaire with no side stones and no semimount" or "I want a black diamond."...whatever it is YOU want he is to ensure you are happy with the final result."
Taken you shopping for the ring you want!"
It's all about what you want and that you get what you want.
Awhile back, I saw a very young couple looking for an engagement ring. They were goth so she wanted a black diamond.:)
In a pinch, an onyx also would have been fabulous for a center stone -- one of my favorites and I have an onyx and diamond ring.