Final Ramsey Interview (Updated in Comments)

brij2006 · December 2016

So here's the update for the last interview. We flew down there Monday, interviewed Tuesday, and flew back Wednesday. It was a crazy 3 days. They fit 5 interviews into 2.5 hours and I met with 6 people total as well as met about 10 other employees I would be working around.
The position is exactly as I thought it would be and it excites me. The company is exactly how you hear about. Fun, energetic, everyone acts as entrepreneurs, yet they're all team players and work hard. No gossip is one of their main rules and it's very present that is taken seriously.
I had the 5 interviews and then H and I went out to dinner with 2 of them and their wives. Family is important and they know they aren't just getting me, they're getting the whole package and want to meet the spouses as well.

So they called me last night after we landed, with an offer. We had already discussed pay and the commission structure, and they had already sent me the benefits package (which makes my current one laughable). So at that time I did inform them I am currently pregnant. They believe I may receive some sort of maternity benefits at that point in my employment, so they are checking into that and getting back to me so H and I have the whole picture and know exactly what we're to expect if we accept it.
But now it's making a decision. We're leaning toward going for it. Talking with my parents about it has not been pretty, but we knew it wouldn't be since we will be taking their only grandchild they see at least twice a week and moving her almost 9 hours away. We know they couldn't care less that we'll be gone. ;-) It's our daughter that they are having a hard time with knowing she won't be a short drive away.
If we choose to accept it we have a LOT of stuff to do and get done. They would like me down there January 16th. We have our trip to Hawaii from Feb 3-12th and they are accommodating that.

We have a lot of decisions to make and this is huge for our family. The only reason we're here is our parents and they're really the only thing we have here. We aren't leaving friends or highly fulfilling/successful careers.

als1982 · December 2016

Congratulations!! This is very exciting! Good luck thinking through all the options that lay ahead of you.

LillibetteV · December 2016

Amazing!!! Based on what you've said I would go for it!

labro · December 2016

CONGRATULATIONS! I know it's a tough choice but it really sounds like an excellent career move for you and your family. Living far away from grandparents is difficult...but I can tell you from personal experience that I love my grandparents just as much even though we never lived near them or any other family thanks to the military. And there are so many options now on interacting through Skype or Facetime so your daughter can really get frequent one on one interaction.

csuave · December 2016

Way to go! Good luck with your next steps and decision making.

cbee817 · December 2016

Good luck with your decision making! You're much braver than we could ever be- I get mad at my parents for living about 90 minutes away.

hoffse · December 2016

I grew up with distant grandparents, and I still loved them a lot - it just meant we traveled more as a family, and it made holidays a pretty big deal because that's usually when we would see them. I grew up in Georgia with grandparents in California and Wisconsin.

My H had it even more distant than me - he grew up in Georgia with grandparents in California and Belgium. He also has siblings. They still made it work, and he clearly remembers his Belgian grandparents.

Is there an airport near where your parents live? If so, that would make things easier. It sounds like your pay would be higher, and if so I would just write in a line item for plane tickets x times per year as part of your new budget. I also suggest building some loyalty with a specific airline. You don't need their branded credit card to earn miles.

brij2006 · December 2016

@hoffse There's a small local airport near them, but it would definitely be a better option for us to just drive home. It will be 8.5-9 hours. That isn't that big of a deal for us and my SUV is perfect for loading up us and 2 kids and all the crap needed for a long weekend at home. In order to fly into that airport it means a connection somewhere so it takes about the same amount of time.

jtmh2012 · December 2016

labro said:

And there are so many options now on interacting through Skype or Facetime so your daughter can really get frequent one on one interaction.

My wife's parents are in Thailand. Literally on the other side of the planet from us. Any further and you're getting closer again. We make a huge use out of Facetime and a phone app called Line to video conference. It's not the same, but better than nothing.

short+sassy · December 2016

Congrats! I'm happy to hear they made you all an offer. Hopefully the maternity benefits will work out also.

I also had a job where I was already booked on a cruise when I went on the interview. I was given and accepted an offer...and then told them about my cruise. I told them I was ready to eat the cost, if they couldn't let me have that time. They said as long as I was okay with not getting paid, because I wouldn't have any vacation yet, it was fine with them. I expected nothing less, so that was what I did and it worked well. I worked there for two weeks, then went on a one week cruise, then returned.

I know this is a personal decision that will be different for every family, but I've never regretted moving halfway across the country from my mom and sister. Sure, I don't like that I'm not as close to them...and now my niece and nephew...as I'd like to be. But it was, by far, the best decision for me. And I'm getting the same vibe from you.

I mean, just a couple months ago, you were debating about if you were even going back to work after your pregnancy. I know some of that was dissatisfaction with your current job.

Out of curiosity, and I apologize if you have already covered this and I forgot, what is your H going to do if you all move for this opportunity? Will he be able to easily find work? Be a SAHD for awhile?

jtmh2012 · December 2016

short+sassy said:

I also had a job where I was already booked on a cruise when I went on the interview. I was given and accepted an offer...and then told them about my cruise. I told them I was ready to eat the cost, if they couldn't let me have that time. They said as long as I was okay with not getting paid, because I wouldn't have any vacation yet, it was fine with them. I expected nothing less, so that was what I did and it worked well. I worked there for two weeks, then went on a one week cruise, then returned.

lol.....I did this too at my current job!

Mustard76 · December 2016

Congratulations! What an awesome opportunity! ...and a huge win with anti-gossip values. I don't have kids, so it's different for me, but like @short+sassy I have never once regretted our decision to leave our families a few years back. It was a great decision for us financially and professionally, which led to a better marriage and home life for us. It's scary, but life is short!

Xstatic3333 · December 2016

Congrats @brij2006! Sounds like a great company and a great opportunity. I hope it all works out!

Stephanie2167 · December 2016

Congratulations! This sounds like an amazing opportunity. My husband is active duty and we have 6 more years until he retires and we're 90% sure we wont be moving home. Some days that's a hard pill to swallow for me as I'm super close to my family but we see huge benefits of putting down roots somewhere else. You have to do what's best for YOUR immediate family and not what others want you to do. Good luck!

brij2006 · December 2016

@short+sassy H would move down either with me or soon after. At the interview he received a few leads for his industry so he's going to follow up with those. There's also a couple other options he is pursuing as well. He'll be a SAHD until he finds work.
Staying home was a means to an end for me. I always told H it would be 2 years max.
Neither of us are fulfilled here. We just aren't. In our jobs, our options, we don't have friends nearby. We're really truly here for our parents. 100%.
We know that neither decision will be a bad decision. So there's at least that. We won't regret staying close to home and raising our children near family, and we won't regret moving 9 hours away to pursue a great opportunity.
We're spiritual, so for us it's just figuring out where God is trying to lead us.

julieanne912 · December 2016

Congratulations! That's a big decision to make, but I agree you have to make the decision that's best for you and your family. If the ONLY reason you'd consider not taking it is because of your parents, well, then I think you should go for it.

And, IMO, nothing in life is ever permanent. If you get there and it sucks and you want to quit in 2 years, then you can always go back home. Plus, it's easier to take a leap like this right now, while your kids are small, versus when they're older and have started school.

vlagrl35 · December 2016

Congrats! I'm glad everything went so well. I'm sure the decision will not be made lightly. Best thing you can do in life is make sure you are doing what you enjoy and that life is meaningful to you - GL!

formerlyjessica490 · December 2016

Congrats! It sounds like a great opportunity and I hope it works out for you!

brij2006 · December 2016

Okay, last update.

I decided to decline the offer. :-( I'm definitely sad about losing this amazing opportunity at my dream company, but at the end of the day we had to decide if this was more important than me staying home. So we decided to hold on this for a few more years and have me come home.
When I let them know I told them the whole truth. They told me to not hesitate for one second to contact them whenever I'm ready to back into the workforce. They still highly desire to have me there even if it may be a few years from now.

So yeah, this has pushed us to make the final decision about me staying home, and it's very likely I will put in my notice soon.

als1982 · December 2016

brij2006 said:

Okay, last update.

I decided to decline the offer. :-( I'm definitely sad about losing this amazing opportunity at my dream company, but at the end of the day we had to decide if this was more important than me staying home. So we decided to hold on this for a few more years and have me come home.
When I let them know I told them the whole truth. They told me to not hesitate for one second to contact them whenever I'm ready to back into the workforce. They still highly desire to have me there even if it may be a few years from now.

So yeah, this has pushed us to make the final decision about me staying home, and it's very likely I will put in my notice soon.

Hugs to you. A hard decision I'm sure, but you'll never regret putting your family first!

julieanne912 · December 2016

Completely agree with als1982, you'll never regret putting your family first, and that's awesome that they are open to you coming back to them in a few years when you are ready.

labro · December 2016

It sounds like a tough decision. I think it's great they are open and encouraging of you coming back in a few years for the same or another position though and I hope it all works out!

short+sassy · December 2016

I can sympathize with what a tough decision that was for your family. But, with that much soul searching, I'm sure you've made the right decision.

It also sounds like you have made very valuable contacts with the Ramsey organization. Hopefully this turns out to be more "putting off" the dream job until it is a better fit for you and your family.

brij2006 · December 2016

I am not going to lie, the company seriously checks out. Family oriented, biblically based company. Check and Check 100%. Their response about both the pregnancy as well as me telling them I'm choosing to stay home over the position, was greeted in a manner you just don't get from companies anymore. They completely understood I want these couple of years with my kids and commended me for knowing my family is more important than a job. Even though they had just invested well over $1,000 into getting me down there to interview.

Xstatic3333 · December 2016

Congrats on making the best choice for your family@brij2006! It sounds like it was still a beneficial process for you, and it's wonderful that they are leaving the door open for future opportunities.

vlagrl35 · December 2016

I had a feeling you would lean that way. As a SAHM for 5.5 years now I know what its like to want to feel like you still want the career and take care of your kid full time but it's impossible. When DD was first born I was trying to teach, gig, and play in an orchestra. All while being home with her all day. It was so hard but then I realized I had to let go of certain things. Hopefully in the future you can work for that company.

formerlyjessica490 · December 2016

Congrats on your decision! I always say "family comes first"

Final Ramsey Interview (Updated in Comments)

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