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Return of the Ex - a new chapter
So some of you may recall that about a month after the wedding, Kevin got a long myspace message from his ex-gf, about how she had a dream about him and she had been thinking about him a lot and how well he treated her. I know we all agreed that it wasn't really something to worry about. But things keep adding up. Starting a few months before we got married
NOTE: When we first started dating, Kevin's friends would tell me how much they liked me, and how much better for him I was than the ex. This was because I was a social person and she never would hang out with them. In fact, Kevin dated her for about 3 years total and they hung out ONCE. They were NOT friendly in high school. She was not nice to them.
Fast forward to last August - She is standing up in one of said friends' weddings. As is Kevin. Awesome
Last January - She is at another friends baby shower. And sits next to me and is sweet as pie. Asks about the wedding and so on, what we are both up to. She is being nice, so I am nice too. I have no reason not to be.
March - the Myspace message
Now, I find out she showed up to Kevin's friends this weekend so there were 2 couples (Justin and Heather, Derek and Sara) and then Kevin and her. What?! And the reason she was invited - Sara told her that people were hanging out at Justin's house, so she texted Heather (Justin's wife) and made some snarky comment about how she hoped that they wouldn't exclude her just because Kevin would be there.
So now I am getting angry. I don't want her and Kevin to be the odd ones out together. Usually he goes home to hang out with his friends because I have other things going on that weekend, like the bridal shower I was at on Saturday. Well they are doing this weekend camping/concert thing over 4th of July and I can't get the time off work, so Kevin's alone. So I'm afraid she'll show up and somehow end up?weaseling?her way into sleeping in the same tent as him or something ridiculous. Not that I don't trust him, but I sure don't trust her.?If he treated you so good back then, why did you treat him like a jerk and break up with him? ?
?Anyone else having new crazy ex issues? Am I being silly??
Re: Return of the Ex - a new chapter
Have you talked to Kevin about it? I know its hard to know that she is around him when you aren't there, but he married you, he loves you and wants to spend the rest of his life with you. I am sure that if things came up that she was trying to sleep in his same tent that he would stand up and say no. I would hope he wouldn't want to put himself in a situation where she could get that close.
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I would get such a creepy feeling from a girl like that, but if they do have the same group of friends, there isn't a way you can really avoid them running into each other once in a while, so ?I'm not sure what else to do.
Just tell him you love him, warn him to be careful around her that she might try to rekindle things with him now that she knows she can't have him. ugh girls like that are nasty!!!
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*hugs* ?
I had a similar problem as you do, but it was before we were married. It has lasted the whole time we have been together and was getting very old. He was friends with this girl, they never really dated if you ask him...ask her they were in love. Well she was in love with him thats put it that way. So she used to text and call him all the time saying she was going out and seeing if he would come. So he would go and take me with him to show her he was happy and all that jazz...never worked she would get SO mad when I walked in with him. Usually we were at a bar and dancing and I would get dirty looks from her and all her friends...grow up!
To make a long story short...finally she got the picture when he proposed to me. She stopped calling and leaving him myspace messages. The funny thing was is I was usually on his myspace so everything she said I saw when she didnt think I did. She found out through a friend that we were engaged and lets just say she was not happy about it. Finally we are able to live in peace.
So, I would say talk to your Dh and tell him how you feel. I would be mad to if she kept showing up places where he was. I would hate knowing she was camping with them and I couldnt be there.
wow...I think that would make me go crazy. I dont do well with that kind of stuff. Dh had lots of friends who were girls when we met...I really had no problem w/it cause if he wanted to be with them he would have been and not me. They all had some problem with me and felt threaten around me...I guess they wanted to be with him and got the hint real quick. only did 2 of them keep trying for him over and over...
I think if there was still someone coming after him when he was married I would have to say something. Its not about being unsecure in your marriage..its the fact that the other girl has no business in his life now and needs to grow up and realize it.
Meagan- What a crazy b*! This girl is out of her mind to be acting like this, and I definitely agree that it seems odd and out of place for her to be acting like this now. That being said, I agree with the other ladies that it has to be best to talk to Kevin and to trust him. However, I do not think it is out of line to bring up the 4th of July trip specifically and talk about how he is going to deal with being around her all weekend without you.
I unfortunately (well, not unfortunately, lol) don't have any great crazy ex stories. Mine is just more frustrating. The guy that I dated seriously before DH is still hanging out around my house and doing things with my parents, which I think is just weird. He used to call me a lot after we broke up, and I finally stopped answering and he got the message. However, now he just has what I consider to be an inappropriate relationship with my parents, and it makes me feel weird. Whatever though, at least I don't have to deal with him
I don't want to fish around his group of friends for info, because I don't want it to get back to her. And Kevin doesn't want to tell his friends who they can and can't have around when he's there...rock and a hard place.
?I trust Kevin, and he knows how I feel about it all, esp the camping thing. I don't know what I am worried about her doing, its not as tho she's gonna jump on top of him or something. I just don't like the situation, I guess, but if she is their friend now, I suppose we'll have to put up with it.??