Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
I need help. My friend is pg.
Now I know what you're all thinking. "Oh great, Paula's going to whine about her friend getting pg and how it sucks and the world's going to end."
Nooooooo. Actually Paula needs help understanding how to support her. This past year or so has been INCREDIBLY rough on her - she's had mystery pains, exploratory surgeries, and most recently a colonoscopy in an attempt to figure out what was wrong. Miraculously, the pg seems to have corrected whatever was causing the pain (she's only 7 weeks along.) But she's pregnant now and the fact that she mysteriously put on like 50 pounds before getting pg is not helping her mental frame of mind.
They SWORE they weren't going to tell anyone they were pg since she's only 7 weeks, but they've since told everyone. LOL (Basically, if you were at our party, you found out.) She's nauseous already and has been for 2 weeks. She's claiming the cravings are killing her already. She calls HH almost daily to complain how fat she is.
I know that's all normal, but what can I do to help her? The standard comments... I fear for my life if I used them to try and make her feel better. LOL
Anyone have ANY suggestions?
Re: I need help. My friend is pg.
I have no suggestions. Poor thing though.
.: Diary of a Recovering Runner :.
My morning sickness didn't start until about 9 weeks. And lasted through the middle of my second tri-mester. Ginger ale was my best friend. And crackers. I kept them with me. I put some ginger ale and crackers on my nighttable at night so when I woke up in the morning, before getting out of bed I would sip it and take nibbles. It helped soooooo much. Also, brushing my teeth still makes me gag. Nothing helps that.
I've always been of the mindset (pg or not) to eat smart with indulgences every now and then. I eat a lot of fruit and protein is good. Once of my favorite afternoon snacks is some cheese, crackers, and fruit. I have had not one craving since I have been pg. It does get harder as you get bigger to breathe. The dr may talk to her about a low-carb diet. Don't let the myths about gestational diabetes scare her either. There are very skinny women who have it. You are genetically predisposed to it so eating a lot of sugar wont necessarily make you have it, but still want to eat smart.
I was doing, until last week prenatal yoga and it was so relaxing and great. I loved it. I also liked walking Louie and just going for walks in general. The dr's told me (until our scare last week) that both of these activities are very good and healthy and help strengthen the back for labor. I would definitely encourage her to do some exercise.
I take my pre-natal vitamins at night literally right before I go to bed. I take them with a little bit of juice. This way I don't feel the nauseous effects some people do and the juice helps with not leaving a bad taste in my mouth.
I don't know if this is the type of stuff you are looking for. I have gained 25 lbs so far and 8 of those are baby weight, and they still have a lot more to grow. I really think eating healthy and being smart go a long way in making you feel good.
I also wanted to add to encourage her to drink lots of water early on. This will be important as she gets into her 3rd tri. Dehyrdration can cause braxton hicks and real contractions too (believe me I know....lol).
I don't know if you guys are into doing things for each other, but I got this book called "The Belly Book" by Amy K. It's a really great memento for your friend and helps her chronicle her entire pregnancy. Asks about nicknames for the baby, different questions depending on the week (anything from what music you are listening to to how you're feeling). Asks for ultrasound pictures. Pictures of you as you grow. Helps you document doctors appts. I have gotten these for friends and they have all loved it. I enjoy filling it out too. It's a nice keepsake to look back on.
I would also recommend reading "Belly Laughs" by Jenny McCarthy. It is hilarious. And I think that it would help you relate to your friend in a different way. It's not a long book at all and a very very quick read. Her descriptions of pg are funny and very true. Your friend should read it too.
And most importantly, just be her friend. I have friends that are moms already or are pg right now. But the two who have been the best are my friends who don't have kids yet. They don't offer advice or the 'this is how I did it' advice, which is helpful, don't get me wrong. But they are my friend. They don't pretend to know what I am going through. But listen. And come up to our house to be with me while I have been on bedrest (this is the fourth time). They haven't abandoned me because we have different lives. And to be fair, I like talking to them because it's not expected that we have to talk about baby things.
For nausea: my best friend swore by lemon flavored propel water. ?The lemon apparently helped with calming her stomach and the water helped with dehydration. ?Most of her nausea came from being dehydrated.
Other than that, I have no clue what to tell you!?
Sour lemonaid ( like the real kind, not the sugary kind) was my best friend, along with crakers. She has to force herself to eat something or else the nausea will never end. I don't know what to say about the weight thing, but it sounds its something she needs to work on and nobody can talk her out of it.
I second the water intake. I was really dehydrated when I went into labor and that may have been what caused it too.
Everyone gave great suggestions...let me know if you need any more help. I think what Kristi touched on is really important though. She'll probably want to have a "normal" friend that doesn't always want to talk baby stuff with her. So try to keep your friendship as it had been in the past.
And remind your friend that giving in to cravings is the same when pregnant or not. If you don't give in the craving will probably just get worse and then you'll stuff your face full of whatever it is. LOL!
This is my fear...if I don't say something about the cravings, I'm a bad friend for not telling her the truth. If I do say something about the cravings, I'm a dead woman. She will kill me. I keep asking Greg if HH (who is our very close friend) is doing okay - she is playing a lot of the "I'm pregnant, get me this" games.
And she's ALREADY have a tough time - she was complaining the other day that she "doesn't feel pregnant". I nearly looked at her and said "You're 7 weeks along, what did you expect?"
Oh boy it sounds like she's in for a long 40 weeks then if she is only at 7 weeks and is already complaining about not feeling pregnant and making her husband go out and get her things. That's tough because so many women have the "I'm eating for 2" mentality but in reality they aren't and should only be eating about 300 calories more each day.
I fear your friend is only going to feel more fat for a while since a lot of women have major bloating at the beginning of pregnancy. If it's such a sore spot and you don't want to bring it up with her maybe talk to her husband about how many extra calories she should be eating and see if he can cautiously bring it up to her. Otherwise it'll be up to her doctor to tell her if she's putting on too much weight and eating too much.
ROFL...he commented how she's been going to bed super early last night at softball (which is why she didn't come to the game... no big deal.) I looked at him and said "Buddy... you've got a long road ahead of you..." He just did this kind of face
because he knows. I think he's as much afraid of her as we are. LOL