Domestic Goddess?

Sarah05102009 · July 2009

How do you share chores around the house? Have you found a consistent system that works? I just feel like things around the house are done sporatically and not in an orderly fashion. I border on being Mom-ish and I'd rather just feel like partners instead.

Any systems you have, I would appreciate

emmypants · July 2009

Your sig picture is very cute!! It looks like our shoes were similar.

Brett cooks 99% of the time, he is a great cook. I thought I did the dishes, but came home last night to a clean, spotless, all dishes done & put away kitchen. I was super impressed

I do the laundry & clean the bathrooms, he takes care of the yard. That one works just fine for me, I have no green thumb.

He cracked me up the other day, I bought a swiffer duster and he dusted the whole house, he'd never seen one. I told him to have fun and I'd put his name on it :P We equally sweep/swiffer the floor. He works in a food production plant and is OCD about clean floors, so I let him do it. I take care of the cat stuff.

It works out pretty well. We do the grocery shopping together, we have a notepad on the fridge for what we need and I've discovered the cool world of coupons, so that's nice.

Do you feel like marriage "domesticated" you? I didn't live with him prior to the wedding and a lot of people have commented since we've moved in, I've mellowed out and have gotten more organized and stuff. Which is scary, because I'm always organizing things Stick out tongue

ameliaandmatt · July 2009

We don't really have a "system" but usually most of the stuff inside is done by me, and the outside stuff is done by him. He's the official bug squisher and picker upper though. That's one thing I won't do Stick out tongue

If I'm having a really busy week at work he'll pitch in and do the laundry, or pick up dinner so I don't have to cook, but the regular around the house maintenence (sweeping, vaccuuming, dusting, general cleaning) is usually done by me.

A-to-the-C · July 2009

We split jobs pretty evenly. We do not have a yard though, so that might be why, and it might be different if we did. We just pick a time, usually Saturday, and work together. He will vaccum and clean the kitchen while I do the bathrooms and laundry. As far as food goes, I usually plan the meals, but we work in the kitchen together. He likes cooking and doing "prep work" (slicing veggies, making apps or marinades, etc), so we just work alongside one another.

emmypants · July 2009

ameliaandmatt:

We don't really have a "system" but usually most of the stuff inside is done by me, and the outside stuff is done by him. He's the official bug squisher and picker upper though. That's one thing I won't do

If I'm having a really busy week at work he'll pitch in and do the laundry, or pick up dinner so I don't have to cook, but the regular around the house maintenence (sweeping, vaccuuming, dusting, general cleaning) is usually done by me.

Hairspray the bug, it slows them down haha. We have checker floors that are black/white and our cat was chasing a spider yesterday. It was great fun trying to find it to smash when it was darting around on the tile and it was black haha.

ameliaandmatt · July 2009

emmypants:
ameliaandmatt:

We don't really have a "system" but usually most of the stuff inside is done by me, and the outside stuff is done by him. He's the official bug squisher and picker upper though. That's one thing I won't do

If I'm having a really busy week at work he'll pitch in and do the laundry, or pick up dinner so I don't have to cook, but the regular around the house maintenence (sweeping, vaccuuming, dusting, general cleaning) is usually done by me.

Hairspray the bug, it slows them down haha. We have checker floors that are black/white and our cat was chasing a spider yesterday. It was great fun trying to find it to smash when it was darting around on the tile and it was black haha.

I don't even go close enough to the bug to get it with hairspray! lol! That's Matt's job! He let a wasp in the other day after he fed the big dogs and I thought I was going to have a fit (I'm allergic) until he got that thing killed. Gives me the heebs just thinking about!

Chrissy3321 · July 2009

We don't have a system.

We do our own laundry (I do his if I'm on a roll). He will keep his bathroom clean, unload the dishwasher, etc. without me asking. If I need something done I just ask him and he will do it. It's not a big deal.

roses12985 · July 2009

I do almost all of the cooking, the laundry, dusting, bathrooms (usually), and picking up clutter/organizing. DH does the dishes and kitchen, sweeps and mops, cleans the litter box, and takes care of bugs and garbage. He also cooks occasionally and helps with the bathroom. I have a pretty good deal. DH hates doing laundry so I get a lot in return for doing that chore Smile

futuremrsschulze · July 2009

Good post Sarah!

I'm a teacher so right now I'm a stay at home wife and have plenty of time, so I do most everything--cooking, cleaning, laundry, etc. DH has done some laundry and cooked a few times which was a nice surprise.
Overall I think our system will pretty much be DH taking care of the yard, trash and maintenance type things around the house. I will take care of cooking, cleaning, laundry, organizing, etc. It works for us so I have no complaints.

LoveMyPEguy · July 2009

We don't have much of a system, but we've lived together for almost 5 yrs. He does almost everything outside. I do most of the inside, laundry and all the cooking. But he usually does the windows (Hate those!) and he's picked up vacuuming because he says I run into too many things with the vacuum! Lol! But during the summer, since he's off (teacher), he does a lot more around the inside since I'm working and he's not. I guess it just kinda boils down to what needs to be done and which one of us is around to do it.

annabear07 · July 2009

We work pretty well together most of the time of naturally splitting the chores. He cooks most nights because he is home first so I do the dishes. All other stuff we split up.

If you need a system I have a couple of suggestions. First determine what chores each of you hate. If they are not the same have the other person responsible for that. If they are the same create a chore wheel or calender where you switch off doing that chore. Then either assign the remaining chores on the calendar or wheel. This always worked when I had new roommates. After a little while we would forget about the wheel and just do our chores by memory.

Bottomline is communication. Make sure that he knows if you feel he is doing too little or too much. Then you can talk it out to even things up. GL!

datagirl79 · July 2009

We don't have much of a system either. I take care of the laundry, the cooking, and the household shopping. We split the other chores. He's great and takes care of the outside. Since we have 10 acres of grass to cut, I don't mind at all.

MrsJax09 · July 2009

My parents told us that they talked about the chores they didnt mind doing and the ones they HATE! (Ie. my dad doesnt mind loading a dishwasher, but he hates to empty it. Weird right?) So they took the chores they didnt mind and split the rest. It is not like they have a weekly check list, but they know what chores need to be done daily, weekly, monthly, etc. I guess that is a benefit to being married 26+ years

PallieDS · July 2009

No real system for us. I don't have a full-time job right now and he does, so I do most of the chores at this point.

I'm so glad you posted this because I have been trying to think of ways to divide chores once the job comes along. The idea of talking about the chores you hate and don't mind then splitting those up sounds great!

Hope you guys figure it out!

emmypants · July 2009

Jax, I'm like your dad. I didn't mind loading, but it's the unloading that sucks. However our house is dishwasher-less, so it doesn't matter now, haha. Amelia, I hate wasps. But it sure is fun to zap them with wasp killer, haha.

jzoromski · July 2009

DH and I split the cooking. He does more of the outdoor stuff and since I'm a teacher and home for the summer, I do a lot of the chores indoors. We don't really have a system -- we just kind of fell into it. I'll be interested to see what it's like when I start teaching mid August and no one is home during the day to get stuff done. We might have to figure it out then.

acp927 · July 2009

Well we're not even a month and a half into this, but this is the way it is now...

I do basically everything inside and he does everything outside. The only thing he takes care of inside is ironing, because I hate it with a passion and he actually knows how to do it because of work. This hasn't been a problem yet because I don't have a job. Once I have one, hopefully he'll take on a couple more chores.

skWhitneyAmanda · July 2009

I cook. He cleans. We both do laundry whenever we think about it -- him usually more often because I have more clothes than he does. When we do the floors usually he vaccuums and I mop.

KristieElizabeth · July 2009

I'm the same as the other teachers. I'm doing just about everything now. That will change when school starts in August.

We both cook, clean, do dishes, and do laundry. He kills the big bugs, takes care of the yard, and irons. I make the bed, keep things organized, kill the little bugs, and take care of the cat stuff.

shexmix · July 2009

We both work full-time, so everything gets split pretty evenly.

Outside: He mows the lawn and waters the veggie garden, I weed and take care of the pool.

Inside: we each wash our own clothes, but I wash the sheets, towels, etc. because it never occurs to him. We take turns cooking depending on who gets home first -- whoever doesn't cook, cleans up after. We clean the house together whenever I insist it needs it. He cleans the cat boxes, I keep their food and water filled.

After living together for nearly 3 years, that's our basic pattern. And it's a LOT better than what he expected when I first moved in, since his last girlfriend was practically a willing maid. It took a while to train him back to equality. Thanks a lot, dumbass.

jquirke9881 · July 2009

We discussed things we didn't mind doing and things we really did not like doing and then basically the rest just gets done. I refuse to take out the trash so he has always done that. He will never wash dishes so that is mine. I will say that I generally do more of the everyday chores, however he does more of the harder ones, if that makes any sense.

me2rean · July 2009

Since he is gone so much, I do everything. I'm so OCD, that even when he's home, I prefer to do it myself so I don't go redo everything he did...lol! We agreed that he can watch the kids for a day while I clean uninterrupted, oh the things you look forward to after kids!

)

RockThisB!tch · July 2009

We clean every Friday night (after work, before we go out). We've done it this way for years... it just kind of became a habit. We only have a two-bedroom house (only 1000 sq. ft.) and we're very minimal on knick-knacks and having things out on the tables/shelves, etc., so it's relatively easy to clean.

DH cleans the bathroom and the kitchen and does the vacuuming (the two bedrooms).

I dust the wood furniture, swiffer the wood floors, mop the kitchen and bathroom floors and clean the glass furniture/shelves.

Otherwise, the chores are just done on random days. DH mows and edges the lawn once a week (spring/summer). I do the laundry and we both fold it/put it away as needed. I do the cooking and DH does the dishes. Smile

bayhunter6 · July 2009

I'll be honest - DH does way more around the house/yard than I do. Part of it is that he's OCD about the house being spotless at all times whereas I don't really care if it's a little cluttered as long as it isn't actually dirty. He also gets off work about 2 hours before I do so he often cleans before I get home from work. On the weekends we split chores and I do some stuff all the time, like grocery shopping, caring for the dogs, etc.

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