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Secular rehab facility in York?
So...I love my DH, truly do. But, he spent the honeymoon wasted and when I confronted him, he broke down and said, "I think I need a 28 day program or something. I hate myself and you don't deserve this."
After assuring him I meant "for better or for worse" and I wasn't going to leave him, I spent the rest of the week with anxiety-induced stomach aches. I knew he was an alcoholic, but I thought he had it "under control" HA....I feel like an idiot putting that in writing.
Anyway, he is 100% atheist, so he won't tolerate anything that even has a trace of religion to it (ironic that I pray for him every day!). Does anyone know of any programs in the York area? It can be inpatient/outpatient/group/individual...anything but spiritual or he won't listen to the advice.
While you're at it, I'll take any advice you might have for me, too. Anything BUT "get a divorce" because he is absolutely the most awesome man I've met in my life and I'm head over heels for him!!
Thanks!!
Emily
Re: Secular rehab facility in York?
Honestly, my recommendation would be to contact the York/Adams Drug & Alcohol Program (3410-B E. Market St, York, (717) 840-4207) as they can probably assist you in finding an appropriate facility.
I know of a few in York and Adams counties, but, they don't always take people "right off the street" -- they often take them through a service.
If you have a PCP, you can also have your DH go to their PCP and explain the problem, the PCP should also have reccommendations and it may be covered by insurance.
In addition to the recommendation above you might want to check both of your employers services. I know my employer has an Employee Assistance Program which allows you to talk to a counselor a certain number of times, etc. They might have some good information or resources too.
I give your DH credit for admiting that he has a problem and needs help. Many people would be in total denial.
Ooh! Good call on EAP, I forgot that one.
Yeah, definitely check out the EAP. The one at my company was wonderful for what I have needed in the past.
Good luck with everything...it's going to be a long and painful process, but I'm sure it will be worth it in the end.
Hi All,
I'm still new to posting on boards, so I really hope I am replying to everyone because all of you had great advice. I didn't even think about going through EAP. I'd assume they keep that all confidential, right?
As for being thankful he admitted the problem- I totally am. He was so upset with himself for "dropping a bomb" on me, but I'm thrilled that he openly admitted he needs help. I'd be much more upset if he thought his behavior was totally acceptable.
I didn't go into this marriage blind, but I definitely had NO idea how little control he had over his actions. I thought that he was just living it up until we decided to settle down & play house & be grown-ups. Well, I guess I was wrong. He wasn't just living it up...he was just living. The only way he knows how.
Tonight he went to bed early. We are remodeling our kitchen and he cut his hand pretty deeply with a power saw. We got in an arguement because I insisted he get stiches. He refused for who knows what reason...probably b/c he didn't want to go to the ER drunk...I don't know.
So I took the saw away from him and went to my mom's to get first aid supplies. When I got back home, he was in bed with his back turned to the door. I asked him if he wanted me to clean his hand up and he said he was fine.
This is the type of thing I can't do for the rest of my life.
Thanks for the support. I have a funny feeling I'm really going to need it.
All my best to all of you,
Emily
Hey Emily,
Yes, EAP is confidential -- you should be fine in that regard.
Best of luck -- my MIL has these issues, and it's a tough road for everyone involved.