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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Friends are separated - not sure what to think
So we have these friends, we call them "The Bickersons"...name basically says it all. They are one of those couples who are *always* fighting and snapping at one another but, in a weird way, it seemed to work for them.
It seems that over the weekend they have decided to separate. Wife confided to me about a year ago that alot of his behaviour was really bothering her, but I had no idea that it was this bad. I don't really know what to say to her (she ran into DH yesterday, told him about the separation, and asked him to have me get in touch with her). Part of me wants to give her a high five and do a happy dance cause her DH can be pretty tough to take sometimes, but part of me wants to give her a big hug and tell her to work it out.
Re: Friends are separated - not sure what to think
It's always a little awkward when a fellow couple split. We recently found out that one of DH's cousins and his wife have separated. We were shocked (they never bickered like the couple you know). We still don't know how to deal.
I'd give her a call and judging by her response, either high five or encourage to work it out.
I would call her, tell her DH told you about the seperation and you want to support her so let you know what she needs and follow her lead - but NEVER show her the happy dance or bad mouth him. Just in case she's furious with him now but later decides it can be worked out.
Just listen, be sypathetic, don't tell her what to do, even to work it out. If she's leaning that way, suggest she work the details with a counsellor. If they've tried counselling, suggest they try someone else who might be a better fit since there are different styles of counselling. Remind her it's not because you don't love and want to support her but if/when they work it out it would be awkward for you to know all the details.
Good luck. It's a tough spot to be in.
I think this is really good advice (better than anything I could come up with. Good luck, I don't envy you being in this situation.
This is very good advice. I have a friend who separated from her DH for a year only to reconcile, and then separate for good two years later. Very messy, and not good if you put your foot in your mouth!
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