May 2009 Weddings
Dear Community,

Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.

If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.

Thank you.

Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.

Bachelorette Party Vent!

I had to get your opinions on this! I'm a bridesmaid going to a bachelorette party this weekend and the bride to her MOH she was not comfortable getting lingiere. Ok fine then we don't really have to get her anything as a gift at these is optional in my opinion. I had a lingiere shower for my bachelorette party and she didn't even come let alone get me a gift and she was a bridesmaid. Which was fine but now its her turn and her MOH asks for money to put towards a gift card. I say whatever and give her $25. Well now I hear she is just giving her the cash because the bride didn't see anything when they went to VS. I am super annoyed because I hate giving gifts of cash and now I'm pissed because I think if you don't want people to give you a gift I shouldn't have given the MOH my money at all! I asked her for my money back because I was semi ok with a gift card but didn't want to give her cash as a gift and she said but that is really what would make the bride happiest. Not to mention we each had to fork over more than $50 to go see this dinner show tomorrow night so it's not like I'm being cheap I'm just annoyed. What do you think? Do I have a reason to be upset/annoyed?
Krissy and Craig
Mr. & Mrs. as of May 23, 2009
Parents to Baby Jack as of March 4, 2010
and Bobbi Claire June 7, 2012

Re: Bachelorette Party Vent!

  • Um, I had a hard time understanding your post/typing, but I have never heard of buying gifts for the bride at a bachelorette party...  drinks - yes, but gifts??  I understand gifts at a shower, but not a b-party.

    You already gave your money and she told you what it was for - I can't believe you asked for it back...  But since you did get it back, I don't think there's any reason for you to dwell on it now.

    I don't know how I'd feel as the bride receiving a wad of cash at my b-party, so I'd be more concerned about your bride friend having to deal with that.

  • I think the cash is totally tacky when I gave her money it was to put towards a VS gift card which I still didn't really like but was okay with a gift card.  Now she has changed her mind and is just giving her the cash to put towards her lingiere fund.  I didn't get it back when I asked for it that's my issue.  I just talked to her on the phone and she said she thinks its the best gift for the bride and was kinda arguing with me as to why she shouldn't give it back.  I am so annoyed I really don't want any part of it!
    Krissy and Craig
    Mr. & Mrs. as of May 23, 2009
    Parents to Baby Jack as of March 4, 2010
    and Bobbi Claire June 7, 2012
  • Honestly, let her keep the money and don't worry about it.  If they went shopping together then she probably knows the cash is coming and would have objected at that point if someone else felt it was tacky.
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic
    BabyFruit Ticker
    TTC #1 since 08/11 IUI#2 = BFP!
  • What's done is done, move on and forget about it. As many people can attest, being a bridesmaid is not always the best job. You did have a choice in becoming one, so just go with the flow. Remembering who gave you a gift and who didn't is a very childish reason for giving or not giving a gift. Gift giving is supposed to be a nice gesture, not a chore. Perhaps you should examine your friendship with the bride more closely and be happy for her. And, for God's sake, try reading your sentences before posting!
  • Ditto Melissa...I honestly don't see the huge difference between cash and a gift card.  I don't like to give either, but if that's what the bride wants, just give it to her...you had your special day with all of it's quirks (I'm sure SOMEONE found something they considered tacky or inappropriate about your wedding)...now it's your friend's turn. 
  • I agree that you should not dwell on this any longer.  I would just let it go.  Even if you don't agree with the gift 100%, it is still a nice gesture and gift for your friend, and it is what she would prefer.  This is one time you need to step aside and give a gift that maybe you wouldn't normally give.  It is her day and her moment and it really isn't about you at all. 
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards