... and I turned them down.
It was like an outer body experience. I just heard myself saying, "Thank you for considering me, but I will have to turn the job down." I cried after I hang up with the admin, and I cried all night. I am still feeling down today. I was so sure that if they call me back, I would jump at the chance. It is ironic that I turn down a job I was hoping and praying for all summer... but I had to do it. I have to do it for the baby. I really, really wanted to go back to work, and we really need the second income, but for the sake of our family, I turned it down. I know in a few days or weeks I will be at peace with the decision I made, but for right now, I am really sad that I had to make that choice. By far, it was the hardest decision I had to make, but I know in the long run being home will be the best thing for the baby.
I feel selfish crying over a job I turned down when others have not been called back, but I hope I am making some sense. I love teaching, and teaching has been my life for almost 12 years now. I know I will love being a Mom, but I will also miss being a teacher.
So that's that. I would have had to start on Monday, which would have been a nightmare. I know things happen for a reason, and like DH said, something else will come along someday.
Thanks for reading. I should really have a blog.![]()
Re: So my old job called me back w/ a job offer...
The admin was asking me if I can work until Sept 20, and then go on maternity leave, but I told him I couldn't guarnatee that. I mean, how could I, right?
I think its only natural to feel sad that you're leaving a position you worked so hard for and was a part of your life for awhile. I'm sure once baby G makes her debut, you wouldnt even want to go back to work
. But like Lena said, the nice thing about your profession is that you can always go back when you're ready.
Right. That's is just really weird to me.
It sounds like you made a good choice. I know the decision to SAH is a difficult one. I've been there...I'm still dealing a little with the uncertainty because I've already left my job...about 5 months earlier than planned.
It's scary thinking about your lost income...but as long as you can make it on your husband's income you can focus on what you're gaining...that precious time with your little one!
And think of it this way...don't feel bad about turning down a job that others have been hoping for...you opened up an opportunity for someone else who wasn't going to get the call.
And you are right, Rebecca. After I turned down the job, they called a friend of mine who also got layed off. She is so happy, and it also makes me happy for her.