Canada Nesties
Dear Community,

Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.

If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.

Thank you.

Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.

Daycare not going so well...

So yesterday was day 1 of daycare.  Keep in mind she wouldn't do half days to get him used to going there.  So I dropped him off and he was fine, apparently he started crying shortly after.  She told DH that he only cried a bit.  Today she told me he cried the whole time.

I dropped him off this morning, she rushed me out the door because drop off is supposed to be less than 5 mins and I was taking too long telling her when to give bottles, and what to feed him.  He of course, starts crying as soon as he sees me leaving.  She calls me at work at 12, saying shes been trying to get a hold of me because he won't stop crying and she doesn't have time to hold him to comfort him and calm him down.

I cannot leave my son there anymore, not after she said that.  Who the hell tells a parent that they don't have time for the child that they are getting paid to care for?

So, I am sitting here crying my eyes out because I don't know what to do, I can't go home from work early every day, and I have to work so I can get my hours for my next mat leave.  This sucks!

Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers Lilypie Second Birthday tickers Lilypie First Birthday tickers

Re: Daycare not going so well...

  • First, congrats on #2! I just saw your reply to my post on the 2u2 board, glad I'm not the only crazy one doing this :)

     I am so so sorry that LO is having a hard time at daycare. My daycare let me go with J a few days so that he could get used to being there with me, and it gave him a chance to get comfy with the new surroundings, get used to the people and other kids, etc. It took a few days of me sneaking out after dropping him off, but now he loves it and runs to the front door when we drop him off.

    Can you look for another day care? I cannot believe the lady said she didn't have time to hold/comfort him. That would upset me big time, as her sole job is to take care of him no matter what he needs. I am so sorry this daycare isn't working out.

    (((HUGS))) and I hope you can find another place that LO loves soon!

  • It's prefectly normal for a child to be upset for days, even weeks after they start daycare. My nephew took nearly 2 months to be "ok" with it all. It's a big change, and something you all have to get used to. My nephew used to scream his head off for 3 hours while I had him at the gym in their daycare too...it's brutal, but sometimes they just do it in an attempt to get their own way.

    Being that I work for the gov in an area that licenses daycares, I am concerned a bit about her lack of "time" to deal with a crying/fussing child. But I can see how it might take her away from other activities and children if she feels that she can't leave your child alone.

    I would start looking for another daycare pronto.

  • It is normal for a child to take up to 2 weeks to get use to the routine at daycare and learn not to have mommy around all of the time.  Hang in there it does get better in time.  However with that being said, after her comment about not having time to comfort him, I would be looking for a new daycare immediately.  That is not acceptable for a childcare provider to say at anytime to a parent.

    Is it a daycare or dayhome that your DS is in?  If it is a daycare, I would strongly recommend trying a dayhome.  Some kids( like my DS) do horrible in a daycare setting but excel in a dayhome situation b/c they are given the individual attention that they need.

  • He's in a dayhome, but I think she just is not giving him any attention at all.  She sent him and another child home today because they were both crying.  So, his grandma is going to watch him the rest of the week, my friend is watching him next week, and I have an interview with another daycare and she will let him start the week after if I like her.
    Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers Lilypie Second Birthday tickers Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • What the F&*# kind of dayhome sends toddlers home because they are crying??? This lady does not sound capable, at all. It's probably a good thing you're getting him out of there!

    And I bet when you find a daycare where they are caring and capable, he will do much better and with much less crying.

     (HUGS!)

  • imageNFL_Wife:

    What the F&*# kind of dayhome sends toddlers home because they are crying??? This lady does not sound capable, at all. It's probably a good thing you're getting him out of there!

    And I bet when you find a daycare where they are caring and capable, he will do much better and with much less crying.

     (HUGS!)

    OMG!!!  This exactly 

  • imageAerochyck:
    imageNFL_Wife:

    What the F&*# kind of dayhome sends toddlers home because they are crying??? This lady does not sound capable, at all. It's probably a good thing you're getting him out of there!

    And I bet when you find a daycare where they are caring and capable, he will do much better and with much less crying.

     (HUGS!)

    OMG!!!  This exactly 

    Ditto. This woman does not sound capable to do the job she said she would do. Good to hear that you have support in other areas until you can find a proper daycare. I would give her a piece of my mind though.

  • Seriously? No time to care for kids who are crying? I would have totally been pissed. I'm glad you have other support for the next couple of weeks while you look for another (more qualified) daycare. I cannot believe she said that to you - I would be livid. I hope you are able to find something soon - good luck! I know daycare is hard to come by here.
  • imageNFL_Wife:

    What the F&*# kind of dayhome sends toddlers home because they are crying??? This lady does not sound capable, at all. It's probably a good thing you're getting him out of there!

    And I bet when you find a daycare where they are caring and capable, he will do much better and with much less crying.

     (HUGS!)

     ABSOLUTELY! Get him out of there pronto.

    That's like a teacher sending home a student because "he's having trouble understanding the math I've been doing with him" THAT IS YOUR JOB!

    Hey look at it this way, at least you have learned up front and really quickly that the lady who runs that dayhome is a LOSER, rather than finding out when something worse happens to your son.

    *hugs*

  • Sorry that you have to go through this. The transition back to work is hard enough without having to worry about DS.

    This is why I ended up picking a daycare for my DS over a dayhome. I liked that there were more adults around that could be with him if he had a rough transition. It's been three years, but he still has some mornings where the transition is rough, but someone is always there to take him from me if necessary.

     She doesn't have time? That makes me cringe.

  • It makes me cringe as well.  I remember a coworker saying she had initially been shocked when her daycare told her (gently) that they didn't have the time to customize the day for every kid.  The kids ate all together on a schedule, fed themselves, napped at the same time, etc and all the kids adjusted quickly to the daycare "rules".  They told her not to worry because often kids would still be "unable" to feed themselves at home and have no problem at daycare. 

    She says now, they were right.  But it was hard to hear as a new mom.

     

    However, she also said they were nice about it, they always took the time to explain the why (i.e. shorter drop off tends to help the kids adjust better) but they certainly never made her feel rushed, unwelcome or like her kid was a bother.  Which is what I'm reading here.  I'm glad you are able to find some other options, I hope they work out.

  • He is on the waiting list for all the centres here as well, most don't take kids til 18 months.  And some have spots for 74 kids and have a waiting list of 70. 

    I am feeling better now cuz he doesn't need to go back to the evil woman!

    Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers Lilypie Second Birthday tickers Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • That sounds dreadful. Sophie --my oh so fussy, high needs baby--took at least 6 weeks to get used to her day care and when the caregivers changed for 2 weeks in July b/c the regular staff had some vacay time at the same time, she cried all over again. And they held her for hours, and comforted her and rocked her and loved her. They did not call me and tell me to take her home. They told me the brief moments of fun she did have, and called the other time 'warming up' to the place. Also, they let us do visits during circle time, snack time, and play time for the first 2 weeks, then half hour visits, then half days etc til I felt comfortable that she would be okay (and even then, like I said, she cried sooo much). I sure hope you can find another place!!!!!
Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards