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Feeling disappointed in a friend...kinda long...
A little background; i have known 'D' since college. She was about a year behind me in school but quite younger in age cuz she started college at 16. We were friendly, hung out in groups and at parties. When i moved to NYC 6yrs ago, she was already here and about to lose a roommate so i was asked to become the new roommate! What a moment of divine intervention! We only lived together for about 3 months, but in that time we totally bonded and talked and hung out and she showed me around the city. She then moved to Seattle to be with her bf, a guy she briefly dated in hs and reconnected with.
Skip to now. She's still living in Seattle and we email and chat on the phone every once in a while, but with no regularity. She visits NYC at least once a year and we've always been able to meet up, or she's even stayed with me a night here and there! And I've been out to visit her once...i think... Now she is engaged to this really awesome guy! (not the same bf she moved there for) They were supposed to get married Memorial Day weekend 2008, but they called it off a few months before. All i really understood about it is that she had doubts about their compatibility and he was in debt and she wasn't. Uh...okay...but they stayed together. Well, now they are broken up, as of a month or 2 ago. 
She's deciding to do some traveling with another friend to clear her head and just get out (she travels a lot, even with said ex-fiance). She came thru NYC a few weeks ago to see her best friend and she said that we'd get together. Her best friend tried to plan a night for all of us to get together, but it didn't really happen. I figured D would call or email me and we'd figure something out. We were pressed for time cuz i was going out of town the weekend she was here, so we only had about 2 nights to get together. I don't hear from her till 2 nights before she leaves and the night before i'm going out of town. She apologizes, says she's in a bad place, but she'll be back thru NYC towards the end of August and we'll get together then.
Skip to 10mins ago and i get a mass email from her with the link to her new blog that she'll be writing about her travels. I'm checking it out and i see that she's booked her flight to London for Aug 27th, right from DC!! (where she's visiting her mom) I guess this means she's not coming back thru NYC and we're not going to see each other! Then i read another post about her few days here in the city a few weeks ago and she talks about hanging out with her best friend, getting to see another friend and going to that friend's husband's softball game and seeing *another* friend do stand up! I was available the whole time she was here and i was never asked to come along!
*Oh, i should also mention that the last time she was here in NYC and i *did* get to see her, she forgot to tell me that she was coming, i read it on Facebook. I maybe got to see her, alone, by herself, for *maybe* an hour! And that hour doesn't leave a lot of time to catch up!
I'm just really hurt. And maybe a little jealous of these other friends, i'll admit that. 
Originally DH thought it was cuz i'm in an amazingly loving relationship 
and now she's not, and it's hard to see that when you've just broken up with your fiance. (now he's saying 'forget her' - he really hates it when my friends mistreat me). But so is her other friend, who's husband's softball game they went to see! I had another friend who started making me feel like 2nd best when we'd hang out and now we don't talk anymore. I don't really want that to happen with D, but i know i should say something. But what? I know she's in pain and confused and lost and i can't even begin to know what that feels like. But i'm here for her and it seems like she doesn't care. 
Sorry this is so long. Thanks for letting me vent.
Re: Feeling disappointed in a friend...kinda long...
Ok to be honest at first I was thinking oh give her a break she going through a tough time...until I read about this "other firends" that she had all this time to visit and hang out with. Wow, I'm sorry you are dealing with this. It sucks but people do grow apart sometimes as they grow. I'm kinda in the same boat. There are 3 of us that were pretty inseparable until I moved to the city and now the have prety much forgotten all about me, even though I'm only 45 minutes away. It just plain hurts. I know they don't mean to hurt me by it but sometimes I just feel like outa sight outa mind.
Feel it out and see if she comes around after things with her settle down, however I would drop a comment or two saying that you were hurt she didn't make time for you. Or tell her you've missed her so much and was really hoping to see her. She just may not realize it bothered you, or she may think you don't have the time? Whatever you do...I'm sorry your bummed and good luck with it.
It is amazing how similar your situation is to mine with one of my friends a few years ago. Same deal: coming to NY, not telling me until the last minute, finding out that she had seen all these other (mutual) friends while she was here and not inviting me, etc. TBH, I kind of broke it off with her. I figured her behavior wasn't indicative of what I wanted in a friend and it sort of seemed that she didn't value her friendship with me. I felt like I was always offering to be there and she was never there for me. Done deal.
I just wanted to say that I read your post and I feel bad that your friend hurt you so much.
I don't have much advice. I guess if it is going to eat at you, you could say something to her.