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Oh, the DW Dramz!

Oy.  I'm pretty sure that I was understanding and accommodating when I had my own DW.  I was, wasn't I?  I'd like to think so. 

Anyway, as I've mentioned, I'm the MOH in my MOH's DW in NOLA.  Bachelorette party in Vegas.  MOH invited 34 people to NOLA. So expects 34 people to go.  Is FREAKING OUT that so far two couples have said they can't go because of finances.  She simply can't wrap her head around it.  She thinks that, because the B party is in February and the wedding is in April, everyone should have PLENTY of time to save enough money for both events.  She literally said, "Don't they get that this is my WEDDING?!  And that they are part of a very small group that I HAND-PICKED to be there?  I can't BELIEVE the nerve of them cancelling!"   

And now...one of the 3 bridesmaids lost her job and doesn't know if she can do either event.  Girlfriend hit the ROOF!  Granted, I didn't have bridesmaids bagging out on my DW, but still...you'd think that MOH would be a little more empathetic.  Oh, AND I've been put in charge of organizing the BACHELOR party too because the Best Man is being "flaky."  Ha ha -- I may have some good Bridezilla stories for you between now and April.  :)     

Re: Oh, the DW Dramz!

  • whoa. 

    I will be staying tuned for the fun stories from now 'til april. 

  • It's kind of fun planning a Bachelor party in Vegas, actually.  :)

    But the fact that I've been directed to do it is beyond ridiculous, if you ask me.

  • Oh wow...I'd like to think I was accommodating as well with our DW. In fact I know I was, maybe I'm just a pushover. LOL.

    I can't wait to hear more stories from you...

  • oh, um, good luck!  have you said anything to her???  I mean, I was really disappointed when certain people I really wanted to be at my bachelorette and/or wedding cancelled, but you know, and I know, going to a DW is expensive.  Have you reminded her about this?  Maybe it's not appropriate though.  But I would think, if you two are each other's MOHs, that you are BFFs, and that maybe a conversation could be had...

  • Seriously? SERIOUSLY? That's insane. And SO uncalled for. (I feel like this should be done in SNL Seth & Amy style)
  • imagemsmoore27:

    oh, um, good luck!  have you said anything to her???  I mean, I was really disappointed when certain people I really wanted to be at my bachelorette and/or wedding cancelled, but you know, and I know, going to a DW is expensive.  Have you reminded her about this?  Maybe it's not appropriate though.  But I would think, if you two are each other's MOHs, that you are BFFs, and that maybe a conversation could be had...

    Yeah...I've been trying.  We've been friends since we were 10 and, even though I'm 6 months older, we've have always had a grumpy big sister/silly little sister dynamic (with me being the silly little sister).  Now that we're both grown up professionals I know she finally respects me, but she still has a hard time listening -- to anyone.  It's her personality, and part of her charm.  ;)  In any event, I really do love the girl and we have a ton of history.  And I'm trying to do my best to keep it real when it comes to all of this DW business.  I think it just may be time for me to put my foot down a little firmer. 

  • imagemsmoore27:

    ...going to a DW is expensive.  Have you reminded her about this? ...

    We have talked about this specific point, too, but she really, really has a hard time relating.  She is great about saving and investing money, so even when she has been laid off for extended periods of time, she's remained financially comfortable.  That's her thing -- she can't understand that not everyone makes enough to save for a rainy day, and that lots of our friends really do live hand-to-mouth.

  • w-o-w Indifferent  really?!  that is crazy.  as we all know, with having a dw you have to expect people may not be able to attend any or all things. 

    i have no advice, but i am thrilled to hear your stories from now until then! Stick out tongue

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  • I'm not even too sure what to think about all this.  Did she get the memo that nearly everyone in this country is suffering in some way or another due to this recession?  Even without a recession, DW's are so expensive all the way around.  I wanted a bachelorette party in Vegas sooo bad mainly because I had planned so many of them for my other friends, I felt it was my turn.  But I could NEVER justify asking even my "well off" friends to drop even more money to come to Vegas.  The guilt was bad enough knowing they were coming to Hawaii. 

    I think you'd be a really good friend by being really honest with her.  You're really good with words so I'm sure your approach will be perfect.  Unless someone "clues" her in early in the game, this could get ugly later.  (Even though, I would enjoy hearing the stories!) 

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  • Yikes!  I have no advice either, unfortunately, but keep us updated!
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  • Oh noes, I am sending you 'be strong' vibes NOW lol.

    Keep us updated! I'm sure you're going to have a goldmine of stories in the coming months!

  • I have nothing to say about personalities...

    but, NOLA is a blast!  I'm originally from there.

    Whoever can't go, should take all of their change to Coinstar and reevaluate.

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  • wow i can't believe she is being such a bridezilla!
  • You are a great friend...I don't think I could do what your doing and about to doIndifferent
  • Whoa! You know, I can understand her frustration (no, really), but at the same time - in this kind of economy, you HAVE to be understanding. People can love you to death, but if they can't afford it, then they can't afford it - period. I hope she can come to understand that. Huh?
  • Thanks for the support, girls!  :)  I think many of you are right -- I have to be firmer with MOH starting NOW or else things really could get interesting down the line.  (*starts rehearsing speech to MOH in head now*).  Regardless, it's going to be an interesting ride, I'm sure.
  • imageadpilove:

    I think you'd be a really good friend by being really honest with her.  You're really good with words so I'm sure your approach will be perfect.  Unless someone "clues" her in early in the game, this could get ugly later.  (Even though, I would enjoy hearing the stories!) 

    This, exactly.

    Maybe since she is only inviting 34 people she is worried it will be just too small a wedding if some people don't come?  If so, could you suggest she start thinking about a B-list of invitees? 

    Nancy - DH had his bach party in NOLA last summer and LOVED it.  I was so jealous, I really want to go!

  • Indifferent

    Sounds like this girl needs a major reality check lest her DW becomes an elopement!

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