Hawaii Nesties
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
How much $$$ do you usually give at a wedding?
If you're going to a friend's wedding (not a close friend, but not an acquaintance - just a friend friend), how much money do you give as a gift? Or, if you're giving a physical gift from a registry, etc., what amount do you spend on the gift?
I'm just curious because for the wedding that Ben traveled across the country to attend, we had to discuss how much cash we'd give them - I usually give a physical gift, but they only had a honeymoon registry (just the "contribute to this fund" type, not the "pick an activity to pay for" type).
[Poll]
Re: How much $$$ do you usually give at a wedding?
I feel a little bad, we are not well off, so we usually give a gift of $50 or a little more. If we really don't know them well, then it's $35 or so from their registry. I guess I would feel embarrassed giving a $35 check.
If it is someone close to us, particularly close family, it will usually be cash, between $150-200.
Don't feel bad, I do the same thing! We're not rolling in it by any standards lol. In this particular instance, we're feeling a bit poor what with buying a house and whatnot, plus we had to spend a fair bit on Ben's trip, which is why we debated the gift amount a bit -- I wanted to give less, but because he used to be quite close to the groom (they were very good friends at college, then lost touch and reconnected about 9 months ago on Facebook), he wanted to give more.
We ended up agreeing on $100, but honestly if it was a registry gift we'd probably have spent less -- I always feel like I have to give more in cash than I'd spend on a physical gift, for some reason.
If it's not a close friend, then I would say in the range of $40-60. I don't think we've ever had to not travel and stay in a hotel for a friend's wedding so this is always the range we give regardless of whether we were travelling or not. But we feel like we make up for the amount we spend on the gift on the time, thought and effort we put into it. We usually try to be creative with our gifts and think of something that we know the couple will really like, and be meaningful and special to them, not just a toaster.
For close friends, we've usually spent about $150 or so.
I totally agree! I think it's the physicality of it... I'm using the wrong word, but you know, the fact that they are holding something and looking at an actual 3D gift. It makes up for spending a little less somehow in my head.
If they are really close friends or family, we'll give $200. (Kind of rare)
If they are good friends, $100. (Most common)
If they are more of acquaintances, $50-75.
Also, if we have to travel to the wedding or pay for accommodations, we usually take that into account and give a little less.
We always give cash at local weddings, but if we are traveling or if we can't make the wedding, we sometimes give something from a registry. (I am a little anti-registry, though, b/c it bums me out that shipping and handling usually cost so much, and I'd rather just give the entire amount to the couple.)
I think the most important thing, though, is to give what you can AFFORD. (I only stepped up the gift giving after we were married and more financially secure.) I know I never looked down upon people who gave frugally at our wedding. After all, I didn't invite them for the gift... I invited them for their presence!
DH got invited to his former co-worker's wedding. They are not very close but somebody he used to hang out with when they worked together. We gave $80. For our close friends, it ranges from $100 - $300. DH usually gives more to his friends. Between me and DH, he is more generous. I am more $ conscious!
This.
I usually try to do this, but in this circumstance, I really have no idea what it might be. I've never traveled to the area, and couldn't find that kind of info online (Australia doesn't have the kind of online presence that places in the USA do). When Ben asked if there was a dress code, his friend said "smart casual" which leads me to believe it's *relatively* inexpensive (i.e., not a black tie plated dinner), but I also know that Melbourne isn't a cheap area, soooo...I really have no idea. That's part of the reason we went with $100 - I figured that would probably cover it no matter what the place was like.
Same here!
We usually give $150-350, but that includes both wedding and other gifts, like shower and bachelorette.
If regular friend, then we'd spend $100 on registry or write a check for $150. But most everyone falls in the good friend category... Good friends, we'd spend $200 on registry or write a check for $250. DH thinks a check needs to be more than what you'd spend on the registry.
And those amounts are for gifts from both DH and I. And it depends if we go to the wedding or not also. We assume each plate is around $100.
Malia & Dave & Alexa
Happily married since 2-17-08! Three since 9-9-09!
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This, definitely. We had some friends, a couple, who we know are not particularly well off, plus they had just found out they were expecting a baby. Not only did they spend the money to come all the way out to Hawaii for our wedding from the East Coast and stay for a whole week, but they still got us a gift from our registry. We really didn't expect a gift from them, we were just so happy they were able to swing it to come out, so even though it was just a $35 gift it really meant the world to us--more than a $300 set of cookware from our parents' friends would.
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