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work-related advice

My son goes to a daycare facility at my work. I found out on Friday that the best staff person there, "Jane", has been transferred to a different daycare also run by my work, for higher-risk families. I thought she must have applied for this transfer but found out no, she is being forced there as a kind of discipline. I don't know the whole story about why she is being disciplined, but I do know that it can't have anything to do with how she relates with the kids as, because I worked there, I spent much time spying on them and hanging out in there and I know she's wonderful with them. When I first put Ethan in daycare I was really nervous about it and many of my co-workers told me not to worry, that Jane was fabulous.

Another mom is starting a petition to have Jane returned to our daycare. She told me that she does know the reason behind the discipline (although she wouldn't tell me specifics) and assured me that it doesn't have anything to do with her mistreating the kids- on the contrary, she seems to think that Jane and administration had an argument about certain policies, and the mom agrees that Jane was in the right (and, like I said, since I've seen Jane in action so much I can't imagine she's working to implement policy that would have a negative impact on the kids).

The mom asked me, and other parents, to send in letters to administration. I want to do this, but I am also hesitant to send a strongly worded email to my work. I have drafted this letter, feigning ignorance about a number of details because I want to appear to think very positively of the company, while disagreeing on this simple matter. I don't want to come across as questioning the decisions of the powers that be, especially as they relate to discipline, so I pretended that I knew nothing about that. Does this letter come across as properly respectful? Does it need editing? Should I send it at all? Or should I stay out of it?

Hi,

I talked to Sarah today, Emily's mom, from the 0 - 36 month daycare room. She seemed very concerned about Jane's transfer.

I was very reluctant to put Ethan in daycare this past April, as I had planned on being a stay-at-home-mom. However, several co-workers, including Anne, Jill, and even yourself, told me that Jane was  wonderful and that I could feel confident in trusting her with my baby. Despite these assurances, I often peeked through the windows while I was at work, to make sure that Ethan was doing well. I was pleased by what I saw. Everyone was right- Jane was wonderful.

Over the past seven months, there have been a number of staff changes in the 0 - 36 month daycare room. We've seen 8 staff members come and go (although I imagine some of them were only ever there temporarily as vacation coverage). It was always a bit disconcerting, arriving in the morning and finding a new staff member present, and leaving Ethan with a complete stranger. However, as I had grown to trust Jane and she was always present, I didn't allow myself to worry. Ethan seemed to feel the same way- he didn't seem worried about the presence of the new staff members, as he was very attached to Jane. He often ran up to her and hugged her upon our arrival. Jane has been the constant factor- Ethan clearly felt secure with her, and in turn I felt secure leaving him with her.

Monday morning, when I dropped Ethan off, he cried when I left for the first time in many months. While I have absolutely no concerns about anyone currently working in the 0 - 36 month room, they are all fairly recent additions and I don't think Ethan has gotten to know them all that well. I'm concerned that he cried because he felt uncomfortable. My husband agreed, and he returned very early in the day to pick Ethan up.

When I heard that Jane was moving to [other daycare], I assumed that she had requested a transfer. As such I never would have said anything, as Ethan's connection with her should not prevent her from applying for other jobs. However, after talking to Emily's mom (who I understand talked with you about the issue), I was saddened to learn that Jane didn't apply for the position. I understand that the kids and families of [other daycare] are often considered to be high-risk, and as such I fully understand wanting caring, supportive, knowledgeable staff like Jane working with these kids and families. I also know that, in time, Ethan will learn to feel comfortable with the current staff, but I find it disappointing that in just seven months he has had to attach to and subsequently un-attach from so many staff members. I had always thought of Jane as the constant presence in his daycare life, which mitigated the other issues.

Emily's mom told me that you encouraged parent feedback, and I hope that is true because writing this is a little awkward for me, for obvious reasons, as both a parent and a staff member.  I'm sure all factors were taken under consideration prior to moving Jane, but I still wanted to express how sorry I am, my husband is, and Ethan is to see her leave. I know that many of the other parents feel the same way, and I was hoping that our preference, and Jane's preference, might be sufficient cause for her to return to the 0 - 36 month room.

Thanks,

Lisah

 

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Re: work-related advice

  • I would shorten it. Make it clear that you really like Jane and give a few examples. Maybe talk about how you are looking out for your son's and other children's best interest.I agree that since you wren't dircetly told about the discipline, leave it out.

     

    Also, have you talked to Jane? Does she want to go back?

  • Yes, she does want to go back. When I was told she was leaving I assumed she had applied for the job and so I congratulated her. She told me that the move was not her choice and she was very reluctant to go and was fighting it every step of the way.
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  • I think it's a bit long winded. To be honest, I am not sure that I would get involved. It's a tricky situation. I mean, if there is a disciplinary action taking place, that is at the discretion of the admin of the daycare. Like you said, you do not know specifics. If you feel like your voice should be heard, I would keep it short and sweet. Emphasize that, at that young age, consistency of care is important, attachment of the children to caregivers is key to building trust, and ask if they might reconsider having Jane transferred. Good luck. Let us know how it turns out.
  • I agree with Mel. I don't think it is your place to be involved since this is a disciplinary issue.
  • Yeah... I kind of wondered if I should say anything at all. I drafted this letter in my email but didn't send it because I wanted to think about it overnight. It just sucks... I don't think it's fair that the kids suffer because of their decision, you know? Ethan loved her. Making a point at the kids' expense isn't really right. But yeah... maybe as an employee I should stay out of it (if I wasn't I'd totally send it).

     

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  • Maybe you could switch the intent of the letter to express your concern over the fact that there is such a huge turnover in the employees there?
  • Honestly, Sarah is going about this all wrong. She can't ask people to support a petition without giving them the whole story, and if she's not at liberty to share the information about why Jane is being transferred, then you shouldn't get involved.

    All you have right now is half of the story, as told by a third party observer, plus a little info from Jane. It's not your place to judge the situation, or who's right, based on so little info and your gut feeling.

    Edit out any mention of Sarah or any mention of the reasons behind Jane's departure (the last 2 paragraphs), as you don't really know any of it. Just send a short letter expressing your satisfaction with Jane, and perhaps your concern about the overall turnover at the daycare and the effect of that on your child.

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  • First off, I thought you worded that quite well, but I agree with the others that maybe you shouldn't get involved. Right now you only know the version of the story that the parents are relaying, and you know how the bias can play in.... plus because it's your workplace... it's a little bit of a risk.

    I know how much it can shake kids with such a high turnover... I agree that maybe you should address that and not the Jane/disciplinary issue (?)

  • imagering_pop:

    Edit out any mention of Sarah or any mention of the reasons behind Jane's departure (the last 2 paragraphs), as you don't really know any of it. Just send a short letter expressing your satisfaction with Jane, and perhaps your concern about the overall turnover at the daycare and the effect of that on your child.

    ?

    This is what I was thinking. ?It shows your primary concern is the comfort of you and your child in regards to the stability of caregivers, which is worth mentioning regardless of Jane's specific disciplinary transfer.

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