June 2009 Weddings
Philly6*6*09
member
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Engaged after 6 months
What are your thoughts on this?
Some backround - girl was dating this guy off and on for 8 years. Then she met new guy in June, and they are now engaged.
Do you think that when it's right, it's right?
Or, do you think that people should experience more of life together by dating (meaning more then a year, being able to be together during the four season, take at least one week long trip together, etc).
Re: Engaged after 6 months
My Bio (wedding pics added 7/6)
My 101
I think it can definitely happen that way and is never something I would judge. My Husband and I both fell in love with each other at first sight (well not in love technically, but it was love at first sight for both of us), but a lot of people don't believe in that either--I think every person and couple and relationship is different and I would never think it was my place to judge people's actions when it comes to their relationship.
My parents were engaged after 3 months and married after 5 months--still going strong 33 years later. It can totally happen. I am sure everyone thought they were nuts when the announced it, but they just knew. I love that story!
Personally, I knew I wanted to marry my husband about two weeks after we started dating, but I wouldn't have said yes to a ring then. As much as I knew I loved him, I knew our personalities meshed, and I knew we would get married someday, there were also a lot of things I didn't know -- like, what he was like to live with, what he was like to travel with, etc. Knowledge is power, and time allows us to gain that knowledge.
Part of me would be concerned that, like Leigha said, she is just so relieved new guy is different from 8 years guy that she's assuming he's "The One" only because the 8 years guy, well, wasn't. It does come off as a little rebound-y.
The again, I know couples who dated for six years, got married, and divorced after two. I also know couples who, like angelfire's parents, got engaged and married quickly and are still going strong (my friend's parents were similar -- four months from first date to wedding, and it's been almost thirty years).
I guess I'm joining the wishy-washy "it depends" boat.
This. And, like Angelfire's parents, mine dated for 3 months and were married after six and just celebrated their 29th anniversary. But, if it were one of my friends, I would be wary about it...just to be honest.
Not going to lie, I judge people that jump into committment. I can see you loving eachother right away, wanting to get married someday, but 6 months into a relationship and getting engaged is a different story. If you're enjoying your relationship so much, why create stress by having to plan a wedding right away? I dunno, I just don't think it's a good thing to do. I am happy for people who fall in love right away, but I don't think love at first sight should equal a wedding within 6 months-year of beginning a relationship.
And for the people who said, when you know he's the right one, you just know. I agree with this to an extent. I am a realist and even though I know Paul is the one, things can change, and that's something I think everyone should come to terms with. I think most people go into marriage thinking that the one they're marrying is the one, and look how high the divorce rate is.
And specifically referring to your friend, I agree with the PPs who said that the girl is probably just so happy that this person is awesome and nothing like her past relationship it makes it seems so much better than it actually is. She needs to take her time, especially after coming out of a long relationship.
I think it all depends on the couple. My brother recently got engaged and they were only together for about 5 months. It did seem a little fast, but his FI is honestly perfect for him, and my mom and I knew as soon we met her that they were going to get married. In his case it was definitely when it's right, it's right.
DH and I on the other hand dated for 4 years before we got engaged. That was mostly because I was still in college, and I wasn't even thinking about being married then.
Odd timing.
gmk, did you read the post on our local today regarding a similar situation to what philly posted?
Lucy Elizabeth 10.27.12