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How do i know if i have had an orgasm?

I just got married 3 months ago and both my husband and i were both virgins when we married. We have sex several times a week but for some reason i can't seem to get into it as much as he does. I don't know if it's due to my bc or if we are not doing something right. I don't think that i have ever had an orgasm. How do i know?

Re: How do i know if i have had an orgasm?

  • you would know if you had one. trust me.

  • imageJL0628:

    you would know if you had one. trust me.

    Yep.  I love your siggy JL Yes

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  • If you have to ask, you haven't had one.  They're pretty unmistakable and hard to miss.
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  • Trust me...YOU WILL KNOW!
  • Get a vibrator, use it and then come back here and answer your own question.
  •  You will certainly know.  I'd suggest you begin exploring your sexuality.  I'm amazed that you have never masterbated to orgasm. 

    1 - get a dildo.  doesn't have to be a big gawdy looking thing. my favorite one is about the length of my hand and only vibrates.  i've had the other larger spin and vibrate models, and I prefer the no frills.

    2 - use it with and without your DH

    3 - learn to touch yourself..some women cannot orgasm without clitoris stimulation, so you'll need to learn to touch your clitoris.

  • If you had had one, you would know it.  You need to figure out how to give yourself an orgasm before expecting your H to...especially your extremely inexperienced H.  Buy a vibrator.
  • sometimes trying a different position can help you get there too. if you're just using missionary, try a woman on top position, or try a coital alignment technique. this link describes how to do the coital alignment http://www.womenshealth.org/a/coital_align_technique.htm

    also it may just take time and fore play before you reach an orgasm. good luck :)

  • Lizg0021, Honey ? from your posting it is apparent you do not know very much about your own body.  If you have to ask; then, you?ve not had one.  I highly recommend that you get a vibrator ? then just go experiment on yourself a little.  I believe you will find what feels good you like in a very short time.  Then you can lead/guide your DH to do to you what you want him to do, feels good and what you like ? then come back ? now explain to all of us what it really felt like to just get one of those ?BIG O?s?.  Then you?ll know you have had something truly fantastic that your DH was able to ? with your help of course.

    Life is what you make of it ?
  • Meant to post this earlier:

     

    Trust me, you would know if you had experienced an orgasm.  It feels very good, like waves of pleasure rippling from the center of your body to your toes.  Your vaginal walls will clench, your thighs will tense and then it will feel like your body exploded.  

    The only way you will be able to show your boyfriend how to get you to an orgasm is to have one.  I say this from experience.  Long ago, I couldn't figure out how to climax, but once I had one, I knew the signs to look for.  

    I am sure that you have experienced that yummy tingling buildup when you have touched yourself or when your DH has performed oral sex on you.  Rub your clitoris with your finger.  If you aren't exactly sure where your clitoris is, take at look at this site (NWS) and it will help you find it.

    http://www.3dvulva.com/

    Now keep going, even when it seems like you can't take it.  Perhaps you will need a good erotic story or some porn to keep the momentum until you climax.  Have a glass of wine to relax you.  And remember, female orgasms are a vital part of the human sexual process

  • What Daring Miss said.You don't need a vibrator, necessarily, but you do need to work out what works for you, probably by yourself at first.  Then you can find what you need so you can start showing your husband and getting him to help find other things that work so he's involved in the process.

    When you *do* get there, you'll know.  Sex is way more fun that way.  :D

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  • imagepastrypuff9000:
    If you had had one, you would know it.  You need to figure out how to give yourself an orgasm before expecting your H to...especially your extremely inexperienced H.  Buy a vibrator.

    Ditto. Dh and I were virgins when we got married, but I had many, many orgams before I was married with a vibrator/fingers/shower head. Go have fun!

  • I highly recommend the book "I <3 Female Orgasm"...very helpful!
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  • imageDaringMiss:

    Meant to post this earlier:

     

    Trust me, you would know if you had experienced an orgasm.  It feels very good, like waves of pleasure rippling from the center of your body to your toes.  Your vaginal walls will clench, your thighs will tense and then it will feel like your body exploded.  

    The only way you will be able to show your boyfriend how to get you to an orgasm is to have one.  I say this from experience.  Long ago, I couldn't figure out how to climax, but once I had one, I knew the signs to look for.  

    I am sure that you have experienced that yummy tingling buildup when you have touched yourself or when your DH has performed oral sex on you.  Rub your clitoris with your finger.  If you aren't exactly sure where your clitoris is, take at look at this site (NWS) and it will help you find it.

    http://www.3dvulva.com/

    Now keep going, even when it seems like you can't take it.  Perhaps you will need a good erotic story or some porn to keep the momentum until you climax.  Have a glass of wine to relax you.  And remember, female orgasms are a vital part of the human sexual process

    You have just stated the whole thing for us girls, women, and ladies in a nut shell.  The only thing left out is all the fireworks which follow ?  I can feel it again and again ? love the way you put the tingle back in my life ? now to get Bill in the picture which he has just said ? you never told me you felt that way even though I thought you did many times.  Is that right?  I told him YES! YES! YES! That?s the way you make made me feel ? ever time.  WOW!  Let's Go!

    Life is what you make of it ?
  • imageJL0628:

    you would know if you had one. trust me.

  • i had the same question for a while. but its not like i wasnt having the time of my life while we had sex, but i was curious. i found out that the more i thought about it the less i enjoyed our sex. just dont worry about it. i also started focusing on making him feel good. i love the looks he gets when he really gets going. and now i know that i have multiple orgasms each time. :)
  • yup you would know
  • get your husband to lick the lollipop for about 20 mins.  you will def. have an orgasm.  and you will know.
  • I have wondered the same thing. Everyone here seems to have a really amazing experience. I feel mild contractions inside but it is nothing I couldn't live without. I just feel like okay, I'm done... is this not it? 

  • imageKara1287:

    I have wondered the same thing. Everyone here seems to have a really amazing experience. I feel mild contractions inside but it is nothing I couldn't live without. I just feel like okay, I'm done... is this not it? 

    Well Kara1287, I don?t believe you?ve given yourself enough credit for orgasms.  Many times this is the way they start out.  They do make you tingle inside alright (with a little more to add) sometimes described as mini-contractions to start out with; but, this is not always the case.  If you were to have given these simple contractions a little more time then they might have blossomed into full blown vaginal orgasm(s) that you would have definitely not mistaken for just mere mild-contractions.

     

    This sounds as if you didn?t just follow through to a complete orgasm.  What a shame ? you?ve probably missed out on an experience like none other which you could have really enjoyed.  EmilySurprise

     

    Life is what you make of it ?
  • imagesmithleye:
    imageKara1287:

    I have wondered the same thing. Everyone here seems to have a really amazing experience. I feel mild contractions inside but it is nothing I couldn't live without. I just feel like okay, I'm done... is this not it? 

    Well Kara1287, I don?t believe you?ve given yourself enough credit for orgasms.  Many times this is the way they start out.  They do make you tingle inside alright (with a little more to add) sometimes described as mini-contractions to start out with; but, this is not always the case.  If you were to have given these simple contractions a little more time then they might have blossomed into full blown vaginal orgasm(s) that you would have definitely not mistaken for just mere mild-contractions.

     

    This sounds as if you didn?t just follow through to a complete orgasm.  What a shame ? you?ve probably missed out on an experience like none other which you could have really enjoyed.  EmilySurprise

     

     

    Hm, well that is interesting. That is the only feeling I have ever felt in my life. I mean, what I feel is nice, sometimes more than others, but like I said it doesn't seem to be anything like what others describe. 

    I guess I've never really tried to continue stimulation beyond that point b/c it feels like that is the end... and sometimes I get a weird overwhelming feeling/ "shock" (like not in a good way) if I am stimulated after this point - is that what I need to push past?


  • What others describe is what they felt; each one is different, but very pleasurable ? take it from one who has had many in their some over 48 years of marriage some are better than others.  Some last longer and others not quite as long but if you get the first tingle, wave, ripple, twitching, then you are well on your way.  Don?t let that pleasure die or stop ? keep it going as long as you can stand it.  It only gets better.  At the point it starts ? keep the stimulation going until you just get so tired you can?t possibly go any further because you?ve just gotten the pleasure of a lifetime.  You?ll know when you reached that ?BIG O? believe me you?ll know.  You'll feel as though you want to pee all over your husband; but, you want really pee on him.  So don't worry.  Now the answer to your question ? ?is that what I need to push past??  The answer to this is a resounding YES ? YES ? YES going on past the point of no return ? You?ll be glad you did.  Believe You Me ? ~~Emily~~ Big Smile

    Life is what you make of it ?
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