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Having an odd week...
So on Wednesday I took Scarlett to the doctors for her check-up. I had told my mom about the milk thing and she badgered me until I agreed to tell the doctor at Scarlett's appointment. So I did. I told him that that I had two negative tests, I told him about my IUD (my OB was the one who told me to get it and he was the one who put it in, not my gp) I told him about the lack of period. At first he said, " Sometimes it happens because of hormones. DOn't worry about it." Then he stopped and looked at me and said, "when did you stop feeding her and when did you have your last real period." I told him that it's been almost five months since I breast fed and that I have only had spotting that has slowly tapered off to nothing, I haven't had a period. I swear his eyebrows hit his hair line.
He laughed at me and said, "I think you are pregnant and that you are in denial" ( I must put in here that my spell check on my mac thinks that "denial" should be spelled "penile") He is sending me for bloodwork but the clinic I normally go to wasn't opened that day and I was going to Toronto so I haven't had the test yet.
I don't think I am. I don't want to be yet. I am not ready for another baby yet. At the same time I know that if the test comes back negative (Which I think it will) I will be disappointed. Given the excitement of the last few days I haven't really been thinking about it. But now that I am home it's 3:30 in the morning and I have been up for a few hours just thinking about it. How do I feel about it? And I really don't know.
I was told that I would be high risk if I got pregnant before Scarlett was a year old (issues do to her size and some damage she did to me internally because she was waaaaaaay too big for me) which is why that particular iud was recommended in the first place.
We would have to sell our house. It's too small and DH said that he wouldn't want to live here with two kids.
I'm not ready to make Scarlett share me yet. I am just not.
But even saying all that, it's kind of exciting and I don't know if I am going to feel relief or not when I get the results.
Well I will hopefully find out before Christmas. And I guess there wasn't much point to this other than I needed to get it off my chest. Thanks for reading (if you made it this far).
Re: Having an odd week...
Wow! That is crazy! Keep updated. I hope you get the answers you need before the holidays.
Holy stress Sammy!
I find the waiting to be the hardest thing in any situation like this with very different outcomes - it's hard to emotionally prepare yourself for any of the outcomes when you know in the back of your mind the other option is so different....
I hope you find out soon, keep us posted
WOW is right!
I hope they don't make you wait until Christmas (5 more days will drive you nuts)..and I can totally understand how you're torn as to what to feel. What does your DH say about this?
I'm sure that if it is (+) Scar will not feel any less love from you, you're a great mom!