October 2009 Weddings
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Cancer Sucks - mostly a ramble.

*sigh*  well ladies - cancer is about to claim another good soul in the world.  My uncle has been battling stage 4 prostate cancer for probably 5 years.  Considering when he was diagnosed, they told him less than a year, he's been doing remarkably well.  Unfortunately, his treatments are no longer effective and the cancer that was being held at bay for so long, is making its vicious and hostile takeover of his body.  My mom called me in tears this morning to tell me that the Hospice nurses who have been taking tremendous care of his body and his spirit, have put him on constant morphine to manage his pain and that his fight to conquer his condition is nearing its close. 

 He lost my aunt, his wife, to cancer 4 years ago and I can't even imagine what my cousins are feeling right now.  They're both mid thirties and that just seems too young to have lost both parents.  They are enlisting the help of as many family members and friends as possible to be with him round the clock so that when he does take his final breath, he won't be alone.  I participated in a similar vigil for my Grandfather when he lost his battle with cancer in 2001.  It is beautiful, peaceful, and rediculously sad all at the same time and even though I absolutely said, "sign me up - I'll be there" without hesitation, I had to call DH and ask if he'd come with me because I can't do it alone again. 

It is such a gift to be able to tell your loved ones how much they mean to you and as much as it hurts to do at the time, I wouldn't trade that for anything.  I think about all the people who lose loved ones suddenly and they never get a chance to tell them how much they loved them, how much they appreciated their strengths and gifts, how much you looked up to them, and I have been given that chance again and I intend to take it.  I have no idea what I am going to say... and maybe I won't even get to if he isn't fully conscious anymore. I'm grateful he was able to attend my wedding and see some of my out of town family again on a "good" day.  I'm grateful he was able to celebrate Christmas with his children one last time - they needed that as much as he did I'm sure.  I'm grateful for his legacy of faithful inspiration because even though he is miserable and in pain, his faith that he was meant for a higher purpose has never wavered and he found the silver lining in every moment he was given on earth. 

So - since you read this far - here is my message to you.  Tell someone how much you love them and how grateful you are that they are a part of your life.  Tell them while they still are able to say that they feel the same way.  Give someone a hug today.  And will someone please find a cure for cancer already!?  Cancer Sucks.

Re: Cancer Sucks - mostly a ramble.

  • Thoughts and prayers. I'm so sorry. Hugs to you and your family.
  • I'm so sorry.  You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. 
  • Thoughts and prayers being sent to the man upstairs.  My DH had a similar situation where he lost his aunt about four years before he met me, and then he lost his uncle (her husband) about two months into our relationship.  It's hard on the family, but also brings people closer together.
  • I really feel for you and your family that you are losing someone to that awful disease.  My prayers go out to you and yours!
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  • Thoughts and Prayers, this brought tears to me eyes, you wrote this beautifully.
  • Cancer big time sucks. But know that we're all thinking of you and your family right now and sending thoughts and prayers.
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  • Hugs, prayers, and positive thoughts to you and your family.
  • Big hugs to you hun. Keep your chin up & your hubby close. 

    I may be looking to you for strength in the coming months, we just found out that my father has lung cancer. He's going to be starting chemo & radiation treatments very soon.

  • So sorry to hear.  T&P for you and your family.
  • This brought tears to my eyes as well. You are in my thoughts and prayers as well. I lost my gram to cancer about five years ago and my pap back in may.
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  • We all lose someone close to us at some point in our lives, but it takes a strong and special person to both handle it with the kindness you have and to share how you feel about it so eloquently. I really think you should save this post, print it, frame it, whatever... if for no other reason than to remind yourself (or others who might need guidance) how valuable yet fleeting life is. I would even write down the sentiments that you have for your uncle and put them in an envelope in his casket when the time comes. Yes, it may seem a little silly, but my sister did this for our grandfather, and I regret that I didn't have the same idea. Conitnue to be the sweet, strong and caring neice you are and hug that hubby lots!
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  • Thanks everyone for your tremendously kind words.  Things are progressing for him like we all anticipated.  For the first time in my memory, he's gotten a bit crabby - not that I can blame him one bit. I think I'd be pretty crabby too if the situation was reversed.  Thats got to be tough on my cousins too.  Their normally happy, upbeat, optimistic Dad is in there somewhere, just not as loud and proud as he used to be.  I think that he's reserving his pep talks for himself now more than anything and that is a good thing.  When the time comes, I know he'll be ready.  I think he's made his peace with his condition a long time ago.
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