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Can I get someone to explain some things to my sheltered DH?
He just tunes me out when it comes to simple home maintenance. I am the repairer of things in our house. If it needs to be fixed I do it. I have tried to show him and sometimes (like the upstairs toilet repair) he gets into it. He will listen and learn. But if it slightly inconveniences him he tunes me out and I have had it up to here with him.
But the thing that is lately ticking me off to no end? The laundry tub. Our laundry room is teeny tiny. I hate it. THere isn't a lot of space in there and no counter to fold clothes on. It drives me crazy. Drives DH crazy too and quite often to give himself some room to maneuver in there he will put a laundry basket in the laundry tub. I have explained to him that this is a bad idea. That the washer drains INTO the tub and if he puts the laundry baskets in there the clothes will get wet and possibly get moldy if they don't get seen to for a week. If they get moldy they have to be thrown out. It's a waste of money and I have already had to toss a few sweaters of mine and a pair of his jeans.
So a few weeks ago my cousin drops off a bunch of maternity clothes of mine that she had borrowed. She basically took everything of mine and I am a clothes horse so there was a ton of it. I was going to wash it before I put it away so I tossed the bag into the laundry room AFTER fishing out a dress for a friend. DH does laundry before we go away for CHristmas. DH does laundry when we get back. He says to me, "you worry about your work I will sort the pile and everything." I think fantastic. I haven't been into our laundry room for weeks.
Today I realize that he has hardly done any of my stuff (I have been living in track pants since New Years because I am sitting at home sewing everyday) SO I think I will toss a load of my stuff in so I can go out this afternoon without looking like a shlub. What's in the laundry tub? My bag of mat clothes, opened, soaked and smelly.
I am going to have to go through it to see what to keep and what to toss. IT's annoying because he's going to *** when I buy clothes for my next pregnancy when I bought so much for the first. But it's his fault if I have to toss it.
Re: Can I get someone to explain some things to my sheltered DH?
I can soooooo relate to this. I was raised being forced to learn about home and vehicle maintenance...my dad always told me that I should never rely on a man to do it for me. Despite my best efforts, DH won't/can't step up. I end up doing it and he works as my gopher! lol
This is true also when it comes to laundry. We are lucky enough, now, t have a good sized laundry room but he still manages to mess up my system and things have gotten ruined. He has run a load in the washer and left them there for a week (can someone say mildew?), etc. I just had to come to accept that there are som things that he just can't be trusted to do. The compromise? I do all the laundry and he folds. That's the best I can hope for.
It's a shame to have to throw things out, especially clothing, it can get so expensive.
This would be the reason why my DH is not allowed to touch the laundry. I do all of the laundry, he is more than welcome to do his own, but leaves it for me to do.
He's not terribly handy around the house, but does cook and clean, so I won't complain.
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I realize you're just venting here (rightly so!) but maybe you can do this? We have a laundry tub and the washer doesn't drain into it. I don't know anything about plumbing though.
Sometimes I have to talk to DH like this:
Okay, look at me. No, right at me, in the eyes. insert instruction here Okay, now repeat that to me.
He gets really distracted sometimes.
If the clothes are ruined you should total up the cost of them and show it to him, maybe then he would really understand.
lmao. Maybe this would work. I have thought about the direct drain thing (which I don't know how to do) but my dad's arms are really bad right now and I don't want to have to get a plumber so it (like my leaky shower) have to wait until he's up to showing me what the hell to do.
lol, this is how we talked to the kids when I used to be a camp counsellor, only way to make sure (or at least up our chances) that they were listening.
Good idea with adding up the cost of the clothes - that should open up his eyes!
My DH isn't much of a handyman (like really not at all) but he wants to learn. For his birthday, I bought him the Reader's Digest Complete Guide to Home Repair. It is quite good. I definitely recommend it. Anyway, I don't know if that may help some of your DH's but....
I know it's terrible to say it, but it is like talking to a kid. He's either making goo goo faces at DD or one eye is still on the TV. Even then he sometimes says "Okay, sure. Oh...wait...what did you say?" It's really just an attention span thing.