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F/U: for those who don't think we should help Haiti
Note: this is not addressed to the women of this board who have a heart. This is for those women who want to be able to sit down to their nightly sitcoms w/o being "bothered" by concerns over the hundred of thousands of Haitian going through hell.
If you do not think we have a moral obligation to help Haiti (God help you), please know that the U.S. owes this to Haiti.
- After Haitians independence in 1804, the US refused to recognize it as an independent country--wouldn't want our own slaves to get the idea they could be free and self-governing, now would we?
- US financially backed decades of cruel Haitian dictators--couldn't let Haiti turn communist now could we?
- US poured money in "humanitarian" projects in Haiti which were really political pay-offs to large US contractors--e.g. building a damned reservoir over the largest portion of Haiti's arable land forcing Haitian farmers to try farming on the sides of steep mountains making subsistence agriculture in Haiti impossible.
There is plenty of Haitian blood on the United State's collective conscience. A good portion of Haiti's misery is at the fault of the US and other developed nations.
So even if you can sit back and eat your doritos while watching 30 Rock without being nagged by a conscience, maybe you can just get up and use the potty during commercials so those Americans with hearts can go about trying to help the strong, beautiful people of Haiti.
Re: F/U: for those who don't think we should help Haiti
I read the post you're referring to and:
a) No one was saying NO AID TO HAITI. I gauged it simply as a reflection of "wow, we do spend so much money overseas and with all these ads that are published about sending money over there I wish we could get some of the same people to donate $10 to US funds". Not that people don't but take it FWIW.
b) Who are you? ETA: This is non-confrontational, but I'm curious bc you've never popped in before.
And c) It wasn't a cry to not help so they can eat chips and watch TV. That's a bit of a stretch.
GlenLake read my mind!
Who are you? This is a pretty close knit board- you come on cursing and name calling. It's one thing to disagree but I think every other woman that replied did it with a little more grace & dignity. It's not like anyone is "scared to say it", like you posted- it's just that others have learned to express their opinions in a more appropriate fashion.
I am very sorry for what happened in Haiti but I don't think you're doing much good for awareness by a snarky post like this.
First off, if you are a true Upstater- way to make a splash onto the board!
I want to thank you for this. It has been eating at me the number of people who object to us helping out in Haiti but haven't wanted to say anything because I don't want anyone to think I am attacking them. (not so much on this board but others and on facebook- sometimes I wish we didn't have the access to others' thoughts the way we do now!) Yes, we should be helping those on our own soil (but that shouldn't just be the governments responsibility- all Americans should be helping our fellow citizens) but when something as tragic as the earthquake in Haiti occurs, I see nothing wrong in asking people to help. That country has a been through hell (and that's before the earthquake even hit).
Thank you for starting (although a little harshly- but maybe that's whats needed) this conversation.
Thank you for posting, I have been thinking of you and wondering if your kiddos were home! I see that they are and thankful!
When this happened I mentioned your story to my dh, just wondering out loud if your kids were safe and/or home. I couldn't recall your nest name, but remember you from SAIF.
I wish I could scoop up all these poor babies that have been left, it is so sad!
Theoretically, I agree with you, but I also agree with GLL who said that your approach does not help to get your point across. Chastising people for their beliefs (no matter how different or crazy they may be) is never the way to be heard.
I think Two addressed the fundraising issue best in the OP:
I donated almost immediately to the relief effort in Haiti, and donated again this morning after hearing about the 6.1 "aftershock", but I also donate to many local and national charities throughout the year for domestic and local causes.
I understand where some of the ladies are coming from--it's just like I hate being asked at the supermarket to donate to their charity of the week. If I want to donate to something, I will. I don't need it being shoved in my face.
I think as a nation of means, we have a moral obligation to help those who are less fortunate, unfortunately, not everyone agrees with me on that point and they are all entitled to their own opinion.
I was the one who started that post. I come on this board, not only to share my opinions, but to hear the opinions of the other ladies, whom I respect. I love hearing different points of view on issues and frankly, I like the discussion that my post caused. I LEARNED something from hearing other peoples thoughts, which is what I am always striving to do. It's always nice to be able to hear a different side and to get out of my own head.
My post was not meant out of disrespect to Haiti or the people of Haiti. It is unimaginable and catastrophic what happened to them, in the past and right now, and I do feel horrible (I think I said that at the time).
So I'm sorry if you took that post the wrong way, that was not my intention. And I never said no one should donate money. I just think that the US has a lot of issues to sort through before we go spending money to help other countries. That is my opinion, like it or not. To the ladies who participated in the non-snarky discussion, I thank you. Especially to Two who was able to provide facts to help me open up my eyes to how things work.
First off, I called her self-absorbed b/c her statements indicated clearly that she is. Ditto for why I called her selfish. I called her a b*tch b/c honestly, she needed to hear it. Sometimes we all need a cold splash of water in the face.
I originally tried to write something less inflammatory, but the previous posters (like Two) had already said things well. I was incensed by her callousness and stand by my words.
Getting angry--as she clearly stated she was--that others were asking for donations for Haiti while there are others in the US need help is like getting upset when something good happens to someone else but not to you (except more morally culpable b/c in this instance it really isn't just good happening it is trying to save lives). As it is now the donations are not enough. The poorest poor in the US have resources individuals in Haiti could never dream of. Of course, we should also donate to charities stateside. Asking for donations to Haiti does not prevent people from donating to other charities stateside, but YES the need in Haiti right now is immeasurably more dire.
I'll take the bait here. I'm not going to comment on Haiti, but what happened surrounding this and the previous posts. As others have said - we are a pretty tight knit group here. Many of us have been posting on this board (& theknot upstate board) for many years.
Candm, I don't know if you are and Upstater, or if you've just come to cause trouble and name call one of our long term residents. I understand that you have children from Haiti and so this is a passionate viewpoint of yours. However, you not only posted once, but twice calling Tina a b*tch. That sister, was classless and uncalled for. Then you go out of your way to write this seperate piece of soapbox drivel? Who do you think you are?
I won't speak for others on this, so I'll speak for myself. I am very welcoming to new folks on this board. But if you're just here to be mean, cause trouble, name call and then lecture us about our discussions, then let me say it plain and simple - you are not welcome here. Please leave.
Ok, now I did not take your first comment as a personal attack, but this one is and it's not welcome on this board. You can think what you want of me and my opinions, that's fine. But don't come on here to cause trouble with the regular posters.
It's obvious that we have different opinions, but there is never a need to launch a name-calling attack on anyone, EVER. It's completely counterproductive. I stand by my words as well, so agree to disagree and move on. There was no need for you to make that 2nd post and outright call me a b*itch. You made your point with your first post.
Candm, I don't know if you are and Upstater, or if you've just come to cause trouble and name call one of our long term residents. I understand that you have children from Haiti and so this is a passionate viewpoint of yours. However, you not only posted once, but twice calling Tina a b*tch. That sister, was classless and uncalled for. Then you go out of your way to write this seperate piece of soapbox drivel? Who do you think you are?
I won't speak for others on this, so I'll speak for myself. I am very welcoming to new folks on this board. But if you're just here to be mean, cause trouble, name call and then lecture us about our discussions, then let me say it plain and simple - you are not welcome here. Please leave.
Ditto
I had responded to that post, so I will also respond here. You have NO idea how much heart the women on this board have - this is an incredible group of women you are dealing with here. Do I feel badly for everything that happened in Haiti - ABSOLUTELY! However, you probably don't know this about me:
My sister, BIL, and 1 year old nephew lived in New Orleans. On August 27, 2005 they took what they thought would once again be a three day trip out of the city for another hurricane. WRONG! August 29, 2005 would change their lives forever. Were they lucky in that they rented and were in the small portion of the city that wasn't flooded, yes. However, their home was damaged, when they could get back in everything was full of mold and had to be gotten rid of. They couldn't go back to live there because they lost their jobs due to Katrina. Their friends and co-workers lost their homes. My sister's mentor, who was very close to our family, lost her life shortly after because everything she lived for was taken away because of the storm. When I went down there 18 months later and drove around the real New Orleans, it sickened me to see that nothing had been done. Don't be fooled by the images you see of the French Quarter - flood gates protected that. There is so much that needs to be done still in that area. The way our government reacted to a disaster in our own 50 states was nowhere near how quickly they react to other countries, and that is what still bothers me. When something like this hits close to home you feel strongly about it.
We all have reasons for feeling one way or another over situations and causes and we should all respect the fact that as individuals we are allowed to have such feelings.
Now that I've rambled I'll shut up now and go back to work.
Ditto. I'm not very active on this board, but I felt like this deserved responding to. When I do post it's because I feel like I can get objective opinions and support from you gals. This kind of behavior is just silly and childish, especially from someone whom lots of us have never encountered before.
I won't speak for others on this, so I'll speak for myself. I am very welcoming to new folks on this board. But if you're just here to be mean, cause trouble, name call and then lecture us about our discussions, then let me say it plain and simple - you are not welcome here. Please leave.
You are not welcome here.
While what has happened in Haiti is awful and I feel for them. People are the world right now in other countries, in our country are suffering. The events that are occurring right now does not lessen others suffering and does not stop it. They will only suffer more as the world turns it's head focusing on the new tragedy. I can bet you the little kid somewhere in NY who hasn't had a good meal in weeks is only thinking about himself and there is NOTHING wrong with that. I think it's inspiring to see ladies who can help other countries stand up and talk about the own injustices in our own country.
So when several other tragedies struck our own country and others what did you.......helped when the earthquakes hit China, stopped your life and helped after the Tsunami, helped after Hurricane Katrina, help all the other suffering that doesn't make the news day after day. Are you that person? I highly doubt that you are. If you didn't adopt your children from Haiti...would even care as much? Did you care very deeply for China? Do you care for all the crap that is happening in almost every single African country? Do you care what is happening in South America, the sex trading of children?
I am happy you have ties to Haiti. You should work harder than others because you have ties there, that is how life works. When someone you know dies from breast cancer, it makes you more aware and you share your knowledge.
You did not share in an uplifting way, you did not inspire love and wanting to help your fellow human. You came off as a name calling know it all from another board who berated us, our friends and think that you know better than anyone else. Shame on you and do not come back.
To the OP, I really didn't mind your post in the other thread at all. Harsh, yes, but needed. I think we have all been called a lot worse than *** before (I know I have, lol), so I really don't think that's a super big deal.
Starting a thread to "vent" about donating money to Haiti, less than a week after it happened, while people people are dying, suffering, still trapped, etc etc.... Seriously?? You really need to vent about that? I know it really rubbed me the wrong way, so I can only imagine if I had kids from Haiti.