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My mom teaches entitlement
So, my sister's BIL is really sick and he may not come out of the hospital. He had H1N1, has a secondary infection, has been on a vent for 10 days or more, may have to go on a bypass machine and he's only 30.
That's bad enough, but you needed the back story.
I said something to my mom about his wife's job (let's call her A). Mom said A doesn't work, she's a SAHM. I asked how they were going to make their bills (does he have disability insurance, etc). Mom said that his boss was giving A about $200 a week while C (Sis's BIL) is in the hospital. I asked about health insurance and apparently C has none. I said "I just don't think $200 a week will pay their household bills. What are they going to do?"
My mom's response was "Well, A's parents COULD give them money to help them out. Lord knows they don't help out your sister and her husband."
Um...arent' we all adults? Shouldn't we be able to take care of ourselves without help from our parents??? A and C not included - they need the help because C is deathly ill and A doesn't work because she didn't NEED to work but really? BIL's parents should help out my sis and BIL because why?
That was more of a rant than anything....
Re: My mom teaches entitlement
Wow. It never ceases to amaze me how many full-grown adults rely on their families regularly and almost exclusively.
(Greg came from a family that at 16, his dad looked at him and said "When do you plan on getting a job?" I had to get a job, but will admit I didn't work during H.S., but was involved in a TON of church & school programs. But I had to make do with what we had (clothes, eating out with friends, even gas money... I only got any when/if my parents had ANY left, period. There were weeks I went without.)
I hope C is able to recovery quickly... how scary!
My parents didn't really force me to get a job...it was kinda implied. I had a car payment when I was 15! Luckily my parents cosigned for me to the loan but I've basically been on my own since then. I haven't stopped working since I started 10 years ago.
Poor C. I hope they get some good news soon.
I only worked during the summers in HS and then got random PT jobs in college (I won't lie though, there was a good year where the rent bill for my apartment and all the utility bills went straight to my parent's house). For my college graduation gift my parents bought me a new car but that's where it stopped.
My littlest sister is still in college but should have graduated this year...my parents still pay the mortgage on the condo she and her FI are living in and for any medical bills that come up - sometimes she takes her grocery shopping. Whatever, I understand she's in college and saving for her wedding. The thing that bugs me is her FI's parents aren't paying for much of the wedding (his ex-step dad offered to pay for the rehearsal dinner) and my sister is refusing to invite people to the RD that really should be there - b/c it's "not fair" to his step dad. But it's okay for his mom to invite 20 more people to the reception (which my parents are paying for) at the last minute.
Sorry, this turned into my own rant.
.: Diary of a Recovering Runner :.
Mandy- I'm so sorry your extended family is giong through this - I hope that C makes a full recovery.
My family is the kind of family that helps out, but I'm just too damn stuborn to accept it. I refused to let my parents pay for college (they were still paying for my brother, who's 5 years older then me when I graduated) - I worked 3 jobs every summer so I could make it on my own - that being said when i found out I was pregnant at 22 and finishing my last year of grad school I had to break down and accept some help, I let them pay my health insurance and some of my delivery expenses. My mom and I fight about me not accepting money from them on a regualr basis to this day, they always want to give us money (we're fine on our own which is why we fight with them about it) our solution was to set up savings accounts for the kids - they want to give someone money - give it to the kids. I don't understand why some adults feel like their parents owe them something - sure when there is a crisis then family should be there to help, but it should never be expected.
Totally agree with this!