I had a chat on the phone with my mom today, and part of the conversation went like this:
Mom: So will Ben have a videocamera or just a camera?
Me: He'll...what? Will he have a what?
Mom: Will he have a regular camera or is he going to videotape the babies while they're being born?
Me: (laughing hysterically) Um...neither. Yeah. Definitely neither.
My mom was disappointed that we didn't want to capture such a "precious" moment. However, I can 100% guarantee that I will have absolutely no desire in the future to flip through or watch images of my childrens' enormous heads coming out of my vajayjay, and I can't think of anyone else who would want to see that either. Pics of my face or of the kids right after they're born would be fine, but I don't need anyone photographing the actual arrival through the catdoor.
I have no problem with other people doing this if they're comfortable with it, but it's just sooooo not my thing!
Re: BR: poll - photos/video of the birth
I didn't vote, but I will say that we do have pictures of the actual birth for my oldest. It's not a lot of pictures and I definitely don't look at them often, but they do exist.
This time around the only pictures taken in the labor room was after my DD was born.
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My mom snapped pics of EVERYTHING and I have to say, I am glad. Not that I'll be looking at the crotch shots over and over but it is amazing to see Libby's birth frame-by-frame and has made me appreciate my body that much more. Plus the emotion captured is amazing (on the non-crotch shots)...
Like this photo of Joseph and our doula:
And of the three of us just after Libby was place on my chest:
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I'm pretty squeamish. The only way for me to remember this moment as precious (as opposed to horrific) will be NOT to photograph or videotape it. I'm not even 100% sold on face-only photos.
I love the way you put things....these are my thoughts exactly!!!!
I don't think I'll want actual photos and video because I honestly don't know what I'd do with them in the future. Plus, as of right now, I think I'd want MH to be the only other family member in the room and I'd want him by my side, not roaming the room shooting photos/video.
However, I think I might want the option to watch what's going on in-process (if it's a vaginal birth). My feelings may change later, but I'm not quite disgusted by the visual just yet. I'm one of those people who always watches whenever having blood drawn or getting shots. I just need to know what's going on, which helps me make sense of any resulting pain. I know giving birth is quite a different experience, but I think watching my progress might be good feedback for me during the birthing process.
We didn't get to bring a camera to the hospital because we left in such a hurry, but we did have a video camera that could take still pictures as well.
Our doula asked us if we wanted pics/video of everything. I was already to push and I was kind of frantic at this point, so we said "whatever, we can delete stuff later." She got some really great shots of Russ, my mom and I, as well as some fantastic pictures of Elyse right out of the oven. There were also pictures of her head crowning etc (SUPER glad I had a wax a few days before labour!!). The pictures of my va-jay-jay are definately not something I will look at alot, but it is interesting to see.
Russ saw everything (our plan was for him to catch her,but her shoulders got stuck so that didn't happen). He isn't traumatized by anything. I am though. The first (and only) time we've had sex since I couldn't get the image of her head crowning out of my head. I'm really hoping the squeemishness goes away soon!
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I wanted a pro photog at the birth because a really good pro photog captures such amazing, non vajayjay shots.However, we couldn't afford one. Maybe, if we have a third kid, we'll get one for THAT birth.
Seriously though, the few birth slideshows I've seen have made me tear up!
This is how I feel, but Ben really wants to catch them (if he can).
I've tentatively said yes because he's said several times that he wants to do it, but in reality I don't want him down there at all. I know he knows how things work (he grew up in a rural area and saw plenty of cows etc giving birth lol) but this is ME, you know?
ummm, no thanks. I really think birth is beautiful and really liked Jack's birth but I had no desire to record it and I don't regret that.
I wasn't in bed so the only way to see what was going on down there was with a mirror. The midwife and nurse had one under me the entire time and I had another one they occasionally positioned for me so I could see. I did like watching and I know MH looked a couple of times (once when I got really excited to see his full head of hair and again when his head was fully out) he doesn't seem traumatized and has actually told me he thinks the whole thing was amazing and he was glad that I stuck to my guns about the type of birth I wanted. He was sure it didn't matter, but after going through it feels that Jack's birth was a beautiful amazing event and he's glad that it seemed so quiet, natural, and relaxed.
Now once I had to get in bed for the placenta issues and getting stitches and they turned the lights up and I had all sorts of strange people coming and going I totally felt different and didn't want MH looking down there at all - the moment was lost...
My doula mentioned that she was surprised my mom was allowed to take stills of the actual birth as most hospitals do not want video or photos taken for the very reason you mention...potential evidence in a malpractice case.
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I am saving them for the day that Libby comes to me and announces that she's ready to have sex with her boyfriend! Then I'll say..."well...are you ready for this?!?!" And show her the pics! That should horrify her enough to possibly hold-off, donchya think? LOL!
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LMAO now there's a use I hadn't thought of!
I agree! Good one lori!
LOL!!
We're going on our hospital tour this Saturday and I'm curious to see if they'll bring up their policy on this. When we went for our big ultrasound, there were signs in the waiting room that said that photos and video weren't allowed so I'm assuming that it would be the same for the birth.
Even if it is allowed, there's no way in hell I'm letting anyone photograph or video my lady parts. I even told John that he was forbidden to look down there and had to stay up above my waist.