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PW . . . I'm worried about my cousin
My cousin/bestfriend/MOH is really trusting and makes a lot of excuses for people and their bad behavior. She has a "friend" right now that has me really concerned.
My cousin was here in Jan to have cosmetic surgery and stayed here for a week. Until then I had not realized what a problem this is. A woman she used to work with, who is in her late 40's, has pretty much started friend-stalking her. I think its bordering on very unhealthy and am worried. While my cousin was recouperating this woman would send frantic text messages requesting hourly updates on my cousins condition, would send messages on facebook . . . it was weird. The sheer number of messages and their emotionally-needy content was more than you would expect from a spouse, and definitely too much coming from a friend.
My cousin feels bad for this woman because she is alone, jobless, and has a drinking problem. As the daughter of an alcoholic, she grew up making excuses . . . but being 29 I think she has no more excuses and should not tolerate this BS.
I was just checking out my cousins wall on FaceBook and seriously, this woman is scaring me. She sent messages to my cousin requesting her home address to send a bday card . . . when my cousin didnt comply (by "forgetting") the woman started asking others for the address. She makes these needy, weird comments constantly . . . its just obsessive enough to creep me out.
I told my cousin in Jan that this was weird and she needs to back away . . . but it looks like she is trying to be nice and in effect feeding the obsession. (If you want to check the messages out . . . tell me if I'm being overly sensitive . . . just send me a message on FB.) I know I'm protective of my cousin but I honestly am worried that this woman will either hurt herself or my cousin if she doesn't get enough attention.
Re: PW . . . I'm worried about my cousin
This is scary, and this lady is not going to stop as long as she is being fed. I agree with PP that you need to have another talk with your cousin to try to get her to realize the severity of the situation.
You said this woman is also an alcoholic? Is she going to AA or trying to quit in any way?
I agree. Definitely try having another talk with her about this. It seems very inappropriate and scary. It definitely seems like your cousin, through only trying to be nice, is getting herself deeper and deeper into this by enabling the friend to continue and increase her contacts. It's a tough situation, but your cousin should do something definitive (stop all contact, etc.) to stop this. GL, I hope things work out ok!