North Carolina Nesties
elissaann26
member
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Kids Poll
When you first got married..
How many kids did you want?
How many kids did DH want?
When did you expect to have kids?
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.)
Now....
How many kids do you want?
How many kids does DH want?
When did you expect to have kids? Or when did you?
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.)
How close are you to meeting those?
Re: Kids Poll
I can answer that entire poll with one answer
We do not want kids. If the Lord decides to bless me with one that we did not plan then great, but we are not planning on having any.
When you first got married..
How many kids did you want? 4
How many kids did DH want? 2
When did you expect to have kids? within 3 years
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.) yes, DH needed to get through law school. We also wanted to get a dog beforehand.
Now....
How many kids do you want? 2
How many kids does DH want? 2
When did you expect to have kids? Or when did you? in 2 or 3 years (which will be 7 to 8 years after our wedding).
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.) Yes, DH graduate law school (done), get a dog (done), I complete my MBA (almost), DH needs a stable job (working on it), our savings account needs to grow (working on it), pay off credit cards and cars (done last month), I want to get in better shape so I can take belly pics and not look pregnant in the first few (work in progress)
How close are you to meeting those? See above
When you first got married..
How many kids did you want? 2-3
How many kids did DH want? same
When did you expect to have kids? We were on a '2 year plan'. We said we'd start trying after 2 years of marriage.
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.) No, not really.
Now....
How many kids do you want? 2
How many kids does DH want? same I guess. We haven't really discussed how many, but we know we're going to try again after this one.
When did you expect to have kids? Or when did you? We did start trying after 2 years, but it took us 2 years to get pregnant. I thought we'd have at least one by now.
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.) Not really. We are paying down some debt now and hope to have it if not paid off, at least reduced, before the baby comes.
How close are you to meeting those? If we use our tax return to pay off some debt, we'd be close, but not sure what we're doing with that yet.
When you first got married..
How many kids did you want? 2-3
How many kids did DH want? 2
When did you expect to have kids? I expected to be pregnant with the first by now.
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.) If we were still in NY, we would have all of them fulfilled. But since moving back, buying a house was definitely made a prereq, as well as DH finding a job with benefits (he's a contract employee now, but they will revisit his contract in August to see if they can hire him full time), as well as having an emergency fund.
Now....
How many kids do you want? 2-3
How many kids does DH want? 2
When did you expect to have kids? Or when did you? We will reevaluate in August, but we expect to start trying later this year.
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.) Same as above.
How close are you to meeting those? We're pretty close. We close on our house April 21st. We do have plenty of savings even after paying our down payment/closing costs. The insurance thing is something we'll have to look at again in August. Everything else seems set.
When you first got married..
How many kids did you want? 2
How many kids did DH want? 2
When did you expect to have kids? no clue.
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.) We just wanted to enjoy being married for a while before we even thought about it. We just didn't have a plan.
Now....
How many kids do you want? 1
How many kids does DH want? 1
When did you expect to have kids? Or when did you? it will happen when and if it happens.
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.) None at this time.
How close are you to meeting those? We stopped setting up when once DH found a FT job. Life's too short.
When you first got married..
How many kids did you want? 3
How many kids did DH want? 2 or 3
When did you expect to have kids? When we got married and up until a year and a half ago I was pretty much horrified by the idea of being a mom. I told DH that if I hadn't warmed up to the idea of it by the time I was 26, we would start trying.
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.) Yeah, we couldn't be starving. Sounds stupid, but if we wait until we have a huge savings account we'll be too old to have kids... and if we had a kid right now, we would make it just fine.
Now....
How many kids do you want? If we have a boy and a girl we'll probably stop there... if we have two of the same sex we might try for a third.
At the moment... I just want one healthy baby. I'll be happy with just one if that's all I'm supposed to have, but we've been trying for a year and a half and we still don't have any babies
.
How many kids does DH want? Same as above.
When did you expect to have kids? Or when did you? A year and a half ago.
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.) No, we've been trying for a long time... everything that absolutely had to be done (health insurance, checkups, enough money to be ok) has been done for a while.
How close are you to meeting those? See above.
How many kids did DH want?
When did you expect to have kids?
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.)
Now....
How many kids do you want? 2
How many kids does DH want? 2
When did you expect to have kids? Or when did you? Three years ago we started trying.
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.) Just have a savings and be comfortable in our home and have health insurance.
How close are you to meeting those? Nada. IF's a biitch. (Oh..and the other's we have though the savings took a hit thanks to owed Taxes and we need a new roof, but it doesn't matter since we can't get pregnant anyway).
When you first got married..
How many kids did you want? 2
How many kids did DH want? 2
When did you expect to have kids? When we got engaged (we were 22) DH said he wanted them when we were around 26, which I laughed at and said no way. I said when we were around 30.
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.) It was too far away and abstract to really have prerequisites. Since our house was kind of dated and had a number of projects, I knew I wanted to have those projects done prior to kids.
Now....
How many kids do you want? 2
How many kids does DH want? 2
When did you expect to have kids? Or when did you? I still don't really know when we will have kids. Last year I reminded DH of the pre-marriage kids timeline he mentioned and he laughed. I was grateful
I imagine we'll start sometime before my IUD expires in 2012.
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.) We plan to get a larger car (er, SUV rather) before getting knocked up and want to save a significant down payment before buying. And our house still has some projects, at the very minimum the carpet needs to be replaced. Also, I'm leaning towards trying to get my PE prior to kids, but I'd have to pass 2 tests to do so (taking one this April) and I don't know the likelihood of actually passing each on the first time (or at all)
How close are you to meeting those? Well, we just dropped our savings on building a screened in porch. So yea, it's going to be awhile.
When you first got married..
How many kids did you want? 2-3
How many kids did DH want? 2
When did you expect to have kids? we said we'd start trying after 1 year
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.) no
Now....
How many kids do you want? 2-3
How many kids does DH want? 2
When did you expect to have kids? TTC one now
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.) save money!
How close are you to meeting those? getting there
How many kids did you want? That changed daily.
How many kids did DH want? He wanted to start with one & see how that went. Haha.
When did you expect to have kids? Ha! We originally said we would start trying when we were both 27. That was last October.
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.) We wanted to pay off some debt.
Now....
How many kids do you want? I would have several if DH would let me.
How many kids does DH want? He'd still like to just see how one goes, but I don't want an only child. So right now he's saying two.
When did you expect to have kids? Or when did you? We're hoping to start TTC this coming fall/winter. We'll see.
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.) Yes! We want to be done with the insurance settlement from my car crash last year. The whole thing is just too stressful to add anything else on top of.
How close are you to meeting those? We'll start negotiations as soon as I'm released from all my doctors. Right now that looks like July.
When you first got married..
How many kids did you want? 0-1
How many kids did DH want? 2-10 (yes, he always "joked" he'd like a little league team plus an arm in the bullpen).
When did you expect to have kids? Around now (I'm 30, he's 32)
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.) Have a house was really the only thing we knew we wanted before having kids.
Now....
How many kids do you want? 0-1
How many kids does DH want? 0-1
When did you expect to have kids? Or when did you? Realistically, I think we might test the limit of my biological timeclock. We both have discussed that we still MIGHT want kids, but also have come to the decision that we might be OK to not have children either.
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.) At this point, there are a ton of pre-reqs--better savings, better spending habits, different career goals, etc.
How close are you to meeting those? Not anytime soon.
When you first got married..
How many kids did you want? 2 biological then adopt a 3rd
How many kids did DH want? same as above
When did you expect to have kids? we planned to start soon after we were married since we knew endo would affect our timeline
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.) health insurance and steady jobs
Now....
How many kids do you want? 2 (which will both be adopted)
How many kids does DH want? same
When did you expect to have kids? we started trying 6 months after we were married. After TTC for 30 cycles, 2 surgeries, and 4 failed medicated cycles, I ended up with a total hyst and we started the adoption process. Seriously I thought we would have had 2 kids by now. Instead we just celebrated the finalization of the adoption of our first
We plan to start the process again for #2 next fall.
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.) same as above
How close are you to meeting those? n/a
How many kids did you want?
3
How many kids did DH want?
2
When did you expect to have kids?
Eventually- we assumed before 30
Were there any prerequisites for kids?
Nothing that was ever stated. We were both mature enough when we got married to know that 1. we wanted to enjoy our marriage sans kids that 2. we financially need to know where we stand (this does not mean that we've got a pot put away, but that we are in stable careers that we enjoy)
Now....
nothing has changed, we're enjoying marriage, we assume before 30, and we're in a good place if and when we are readyWhen you first got married..
How many kids did you want? 2
How many kids did DH want? 2
When did you expect to have kids? When I was around 24
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.) No
Now....
How many kids do you want? I would be happy if we could just have one
How many kids does DH want? See above
When did you expect to have kids? Or when did you? We are currently learning to live our lives trying to accept the idea that we may never be able to have kids
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.) No
How close are you to meeting those? Going on 4 years of TTTC and aging...learning to live our lives trying to accept the idea that we may never be able to have kids
When you first got married..
How many kids did you want? 4
How many kids did DH want? 3
When did you expect to have kids? We had Connor right about when we expected to have #1. We had been married a year when he was born (together 8 years)
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.) Not really. We had already bought a house and both done with school.
Now....
How many kids do you want? 3
How many kids does DH want? 3
When did you expect to have kids? Or when did you? Connor is almost 3 and we've been trying for a little while now for #2.
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.) this time, carrying a baby to birth.
How close are you to meeting those? I guess I'll know in about 6 days or so.
When you first got married..
How many kids did you want? 1 biological, 1 adopt
How many kids did DH want? didnt matter, as long as he had 1
When did you expect to have kids? we never decided
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.) no
Now....
How many kids do you want? 1 biological, 1 adopt
How many kids does DH want? same
When did you expect to have kids? Or when did you? Not sure when we will start, DH said no later than 2012
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.) I want to pay off my car (
How close are you to meeting those? I should be finished w/ my payments by the end of this year
When you first got married..
How many kids did you want? 2-3
How many kids did DH want? 3-4
When did you expect to have kids? early 30's
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.) just financial stability
Now....
How many kids do you want? any! I'll even take one!
How many kids does DH want? same
When did you expect to have kids? Or when did you? We've been trying for a while with no luck. Starting to look into treatment.
Were there any prerequisites for kids? (buy a house, grow savings account, etc.) same as above
How close are you to meeting those? We're ready now.
This. Exactly my thoughts.