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I am upset - re: cousin's wedding
My cousin's wedding is turning into a nightmare, mostly because they are not planning things well! The wedding is June 19.
Turns out DH has class on Fri and Sat, and the wedding is Sat at 4pm. So now we have to drive 3.5 hours to Burlington on Fri night. Then DH is doing the photography with another guy, so I am going to be alone with the kids, and my DD is going to be a flower girl, so somehow I have to get everything done on my own (get everyone dressed and presentable, including myself - hah!)
There are going to be 4 flower girls, and my aunt is basically choosing the dresses. The dresses are all going to be totally different for each girl, and they are all sort of "country". They aren't ugly, but I don't like them (like old fashioned, they have a collar, dull prints). I suggested we get Easter dresses on clearance and I was told "we don't want easter prints". I didn't say I wanted dresses with bunnies and eggs on them. What about a nice dress in a light color? And now my aunt bought an $80 random dress for DD to try on and if it doesn't fit, I send it back. My impression is she is obsessed with this one local, overpriced brand, when I could get a gorgeous dress for half the price.
The thing is too - my cousin hasn't given her input - so everything is a mish mash of opinions.. if she just said "order the dresses here" it would be great, instead of trying to coordinate 4 dresses separately.
Not really sure why I'm posting.. venting I guess.. see what you ladies think of the dresses... *sigh* 
Here are some examples:
Re: I am upset - re: cousin's wedding
Yeah... I can see what you mean about the dresses.
Is there someone else who will be at the wedding that could help you get the kids taken care of? A younger cousin that you could draft into service? That's going to be a crazy busy weekend for you!
I take it your DH is getting out of classes to go to the wedding then, especially if he's doing the photography?
I'm not a big fan of the dresses but honestly, it could be much worse. When you are in a wedding, you have to buy your dress and often times it's hundreds of $$$$ and you only wear it once. At least the dress is only $80. My dress for my sisters wedding cost about $300 after alterations and that's not including the shoes or getting my hair done cost.
It would probably be best if you took care of your LO and your other DD that's a flower girl can be with the other people in the bridal party. I assume that there will be other women in the bridal party that can look after the flower girls.
I would get a teen cousin to help with your Lo who is not in the wedding- (a mother's helper per se)
and the dresses - def not my style but they are only 80 bucks and know what- it isnt your wedding- so just go with it- or take Natalie out.
I would also enroll a teen/young adult to help at the wedding.
The dresses - honestly, since it's not your wedding and you agreed to have your daughter in it, you kinda just have to suck it up and buy what they want. Sure a clearance dress might be cheaper and more your style but it's not up to you, to be blunt. The dresses could be worse...I've seen some innappropriate choices for little girls and I think they'll be comfy at least for her (no itchy tulle, etc). So you have to either roll with it or tell them she isn't going to be a flower girl.
Yes - he's doing photography.
The dresses are like linen material and she's only paying for the name, some local kitchey place. That is a lot of money for a crappy dress for a 3 year old. I could get a "real" flower girl dress from David's for $100 and I'd rather do that.
I know BM type dresses can be several hundred, I have been a BM, but I don't think a flower girl dress should be $300+. I would gladly pay $100 for a dress that is gorgeous and decent quality.
Nest Bio ~ ~ Baby Food Blog
Unfortunately it is this super scratchy linen type material. There is pleating on the chest and there are tons of seams, and the "top runner" has puffy sleeves that are sort of constricting.. *sigh*
I'm going to go with whatever... just not happy about it. DD will look ridiculous and she's going to hate wearing the dress (she already cried for me to take it off). The 4 flowergirls are going to be so mismatched.
I mean, I am disappointed that she won't look cute or that I will get to truly enjoy the wedding, but I understand it is my aunt's choice (my cousin is obviously not making decisions). If she wants to dress like thm like clowns, so be it, it just kind of stinks.
Also htey have changed their mind like 500x, and now I have to return all the dresses they don't want through the mail, etc.
Nest Bio ~ ~ Baby Food Blog
I agree, on both counts.
The problem with this sentiment is that you're substituting your judgment as to what the "right" dress is, for the bride/the MOB's. You as the mom would prefer a "real" FG dress, which may be what you chose for your own wedding (or maybe not) -- but apparently the bride and/or her mom don't want that look. A dress from a bridal store that says "flower girl" on the tag isn't objectively better or more suitable. Weddings, and style, are very subjective.
The specific dress doesn't seem like a hill to die on. It doesn't sound like it's a question of $, it's just one of taste. Women and girls have been wearing ugly, unflattering dresses in weddings for EVER, and alas, it's not going to stop anytime soon
This dress seems like the equivalent of a bride deciding that she hates the idea of "bridal shop" BM dresses, and wants one from Ann Taylor, or something like that. (I wore a horrible pink lace dress from Ann Taylor in a friend's wedding a few years ago...!) But meh. Her wedding. As a BM, you wear the ugly dress and you move on. It's not that different with a FG.
You might suggest that the long sleeved one might be hot on a LO in June, but style/taste wise I'd butt out. Like GlenLake pointed out, it's not age-inappropriate or sexualizing a LO like some that I've seen (low cut, straps...), and whatever it is, it probably won't fit by next year anyway.
Sorry ladies.. I may be a little misunderstood in this post... I am just venting that I don't like the dresses...
But part of it has been me asking what they want for 6 months now, and no one has a clue. So I call my cousin in CA, then my aunt in VT, then the other flower girl's mom in MA, repeatedly. I get the run around because no one really knows what the others want, or where to shop.
Honestly, they can dress the kids in clown outfits for all I care, but just tell me what to get instead of giving me the run around. It makes sense to decide on a store we can all go to and try on the dresses.
Also, my aunt is pushing this wedding as low budget - to the point of cooking all the food herself for hundreds of people, not hiring a photographer (DH and my other cousin's boyfriend will take SOME pics - they were told to take not a lot), not paying for flowers, everything will be homemade. I could care less how much the stuff costs, but it seems like a waste when we can find dresses for cheaper (or better value for the money). FYI - she is paying for the dress - so that was a moot point.
Nest Bio ~ ~ Baby Food Blog
Reading your post, it sounds to me like you don't really want your DD in the wedding. Why don't you just take her out? You aren't happy about the price, even though you aren't paying, you don't like the print, etc etc. I don't think it should be up to you to find a dress. You say you have been asking for 6 months about the dress. If this is a problem, stop asking and just let them find one. If they don't, then they won't have flower girls. I'm not trying to sound mean, but honestly, it seems like you are getting really worked up over this. If it's that much of a hassle, just bow out.
So she's paying for it? And you're complaining that you just don't like what someone is buying for your daughter to wear in a wedding?
Color me confused.