So FI and I seem to be needing a little help. He seems to be having a bit...too much fun? He always seems to come early. Like, we get to the actual act of 'making love', but he almost always finishes before I do.
I'm not so worried about it - heck, he takes care of me in other ways, and we've got the rest of our lives to figure this out! - but he gets embarrassed by it and often doesn't want to 'have "salt"' (our code name) because he knows it will "end too soon".
Does anyone have any suggestions on steps we could take to help him? So far, we've tried pulling out and waiting a few minutes, stopping and not doing anything to give him time to rest, and three different types of condoms (which seem to increase his sensation, not dull it, despite what previous boyfriends told me). So far, no condom [though I am on BC] seems to be the best way to get him to last the longest.
Anything that I can take back to him and offer as a suggestion would be welcome. I feel so bad that he gets upset - and I really miss our "salt" time!!!
Re: Needing a little help
Eh...cause it's fun and makes me laugh. "salt" because i asked him to hand me the salt when i was making dinner one night and he said we were out, so i said screw it and we ended up doing it instead.
I never said it was a cute story, i just said it was a story. =]
***raise your glass if you are wrong in all the right ways***
oh noes, sweetpea UPDATED her planning bio
**Nestie Besties with Deutschefairy**
Diagnosed PCOS '03, TTC #1 Since March '09
BFP - 10/20/10, M/C - 10/29/10
June 2011 - 50mg Clomid = No O
Dieted and exercised my butt off for PCOS = BFP 5/7/2012
Due 12/29/2012
How do you know you don't O vaginally if your H doesn't give you a chance? Unacceptable, seriously.
There have been times when he hasn't finished that quickly. Trust me, he's tried to make me O that way. There'd be nothing he'd love more. We just haven't gotten there yet.
**Nestie Besties with Deutschefairy**
Diagnosed PCOS '03, TTC #1 Since March '09
BFP - 10/20/10, M/C - 10/29/10
June 2011 - 50mg Clomid = No O
Dieted and exercised my butt off for PCOS = BFP 5/7/2012
Due 12/29/2012
At least we're not alone! =]
***raise your glass if you are wrong in all the right ways***
oh noes, sweetpea UPDATED her planning bio
Um... I agree. You definitely don't know if you can O vaginally if your H only puts it "in halfway" and... then he's done. Im also side eyeing the "salt" story.
Anyway, I would suggest that your H slows down and when he feels he is about to O pull out... Just take it easier.
We'll keep trying the "pull out and wait" method...hopefully it does something one day! I definitely "O" vaginally so I get sad when he's done before me...but I still love him.
As for side-eyeing the "salt" thing, go ahead and do it all ya want. I'm not hiding anything, nor am I ashamed. It makes me laugh and that's important to me.
***raise your glass if you are wrong in all the right ways***
oh noes, sweetpea UPDATED her planning bio
TTC since 7/2009 ~ 9/2009 Removed Septum and Endo
Cycle 19 -HCG * Cycle 20 -Break unable to be monitored * Cycle 21 -Clomid 50mg + HCG * Cycle 22 -Clomid 100mg + HCG * Cycle 23 -Break due to cyst
Cycle 24 ~ 5/27/11 IUI#1 Femara + Follistim 75iu + HCG + + IUI + TI + prometrium = BFP 6/11/11
6/13/11 Beta #1= 242 * 6/15/11 Beta #2= 641
6/30/11 1st u/s = 1 baby w/ HB 122 6w4d ~ 7/14/11 HB 171 8w ~ 8/11/11 1st tri screening (downs = 1/6,200 & trisomy 18/13 = 1/10,000) ~ 8/19/11 HB 152 @ 14w ~ 9/8/11 HB 153 @ 16w6d ~ 11/22/11 GD has entered my life just in time for Thanksgiving
Baby Boy Negs born 2/15/12
Have him give you oral until you're most of the way there, then switch to penetrative sex. That way, it's less about trying to slow him down than about trying to catch you up
Out of curiosity, does he masturbate frequently? That can have an effect in sooooo many different ways that it's a pretty important thing to take into account.